Please Can You Help Me Work This Out? Options

[Soph15]

Yes, but I have done that and dont know why they do it, the only reason they could have is that I am fat. If I wasnt they wouldnt do it would they?

It is more likely that being overweight is a symptom rather than a cause.

Or it may have absolutely nothing to do with it.

What is the other reason, why is it always me?

They could be jealous of you! You have probably already acheived a lot more than they ever will, and they won't like that, so they try to put you down for it. I get a fair bit of that, but the thing to do is ignore the idiots and get on with life. Don't let them get you down!

Why would anyone want to be jealous of me? There is nothing that they could be jealous of.

[Rosemary7391]

Yes, but I have done that and dont know why they do it, the only reason they could have is that I am fat. If I wasnt they wouldnt do it would they?

It is more likely that being overweight is a symptom rather than a cause.

Or it may have absolutely nothing to do with it.

What is the other reason, why is it always me?

They could be jealous of you! You have probably already acheived a lot more than they ever will, and they won't like that, so they try to put you down for it. I get a fair bit of that, but the thing to do is ignore the idiots and get on with life. Don't let them get you down!

Why would anyone want to be jealous of me? There is nothing that they could be jealous of.

Oh, I don't know. Clarinet, Saxophone? You seem to be doing pretty well there! Non-musicians tend to be amazed looking at a simple piece of music, or hearing you play the simplest things (Going by my friends reactions here).

[appleblossom]

Yes, but I have done that and dont know why they do it, the only reason they could have is that I am fat. If I wasnt they wouldnt do it would they?

It is more likely that being overweight is a symptom rather than a cause.

Or it may have absolutely nothing to do with it.

What is the other reason, why is it always me? If anyone in the class ever gets trouble off them it is me I dont get why they cant leave me alone and they know it bothers me.

You have answered your own question Soph. The more people know it bothers you, the more they will do it. There is a "Charisma" thread here somehwere, which I wrote on (As Charlies Aunt). I had the same bother you are having now, but I learnt to ignore the bullies and the teachers who wrote me off as "never likely to get anywhere". One of the bullies is now one of my greatest friends. I will never be mistaken for Claudia Schiffer, but I could be mistaken for Dawn French. Who cares though? I love Dawn French, and more importantly I love myself. Get on with your life as it won't be long before you are as old as me and Mrb.

[mrbouffant]

Get on with your life as it won't be long before you are as old as me and Mrb.

Shurley shome mishtake?
The boolean operator here should be or (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

[appleblossom]

Get on with your life as it won't be long before you are as old as me and Mrb.

Shurley shome mishtake?
The boolean operator here should be or (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

Shorry lovey- my mishtake! You're as old as you feel eh shweet? And don't call me Shirley! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

[skylark]

Before yet another thread to which you're contributing goes off-topic, flower (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif) , here's the link to the aforementioned Charisma thread, which was before your time Soph so you might find it useful (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[appleblossom]

Before yet another thread to which you're contributing goes off-topic, flower (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif) , here's the link to the aforementioned Charisma thread, which was before your time Soph so you might find it useful (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

I believe you are stalking me skylark!!! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

Sorry Soph- I do hope you manage to sort things out xx

[Boo Radley]

Exactly what AB said! The more they know it bothers you, the more they will do it.

If you prod someone and they say ouch then you will do it again.
If you tickle someone and they laugh then you will do it again.
If they bully someone and you get really upset or bothered about it, they will sure as heck do it again.

The best thing you can do is try to act as though it doesn't bother you. The less you react, the more bored you will get and the less they will try. It may be difficult, but just try it, act as though there is no way anything that immature could possibly distract you from your life course. You will soon see things change.

When you look back in 5-10 years time, you will see just how unbelievably immature the whole system of school politics is, yet it doesn't feel that way when you are in it. Remember you won't be in any form of contact with these people in a few years. So why let them wreck your life before then? Appear confident, and you will become confident - it's all a state of mind. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)

[Soph15]

Exactly what AB said! The more they know it bothers you, the more they will do it.

If you prod someone and they say ouch then you will do it again.
If you tickle someone and they laugh then you will do it again.
If they bully someone and you get really upset or bothered about it, they will sure as heck do it again.

The best thing you can do is try to act as though it doesn't bother you. The less you react, the more bored you will get and the less they will try. It may be difficult, but just try it, act as though there is no way anything that immature could possibly distract you from your life course. You will soon see things change.

When you look back in 5-10 years time, you will see just how unbelievably immature the whole system of school politics is, yet it doesn't feel that way when you are in it. Remember you won't be in any form of contact with these people in a few years. So why let them wreck your life before then? Appear confident, and you will become confident - it's all a state of mind. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)

How do you ignore it though, how do you not let it bother you?

[The Old Lady]

How do you ignore it?? Well, you have to be an actress as such. It may be bothering you inside, but you have to act as though it doesn't. Again, I agree, they are looking for a reaction. It's like a game, albeit a sick one, to them.
Fat doesn't come into it. They have made you a victim, so if you had glasses you would be four-eyes, if you were short you would be titch, tall, lanky legs or whatever.
My daughter was bullied in Year 7, but it got physical, so we intervened. He was also much taller and bigger than her, so if she had hit him back it would have been worse. It stopped, and she is stronger now.
When you get to the 6th Form, the majority of the wastrels will have left, and you will be with people who you have more in common with.
Good Luck.
Beverley.
P.S Dawn French is drop dead gorgeous. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[Soph15]

How do you ignore it?? Well, you have to be an actress as such. It may be bothering you inside, but you have to act as though it doesn't. Again, I agree, they are looking for a reaction. It's like a game, albeit a sick one, to them.
Fat doesn't come into it. They have made you a victim, so if you had glasses you would be four-eyes, if you were short you would be titch, tall, lanky legs or whatever.
My daughter was bullied in Year 7, but it got physical, so we intervened. He was also much taller and bigger than her, so if she had hit him back it would have been worse. It stopped, and she is stronger now.
When you get to the 6th Form, the majority of the wastrels will have left, and you will be with people who you have more in common with.
Good Luck.
Beverley.
P.S Dawn French is drop dead gorgeous. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

Thanks, teachers have been involved though but they still think it is funny to carry on. I have trued with no reaction, and it doesnt help that one of them delivers our paper.

I am glad your daughter got it all sorted out.

How do you ignore it?? Well, you have to be an actress as such. It may be bothering you inside, but you have to act as though it doesn't. Again, I agree, they are looking for a reaction. It's like a game, albeit a sick one, to them.
Fat doesn't come into it. They have made you a victim, so if you had glasses you would be four-eyes, if you were short you would be titch, tall, lanky legs or whatever.
My daughter was bullied in Year 7, but it got physical, so we intervened. He was also much taller and bigger than her, so if she had hit him back it would have been worse. It stopped, and she is stronger now.
When you get to the 6th Form, the majority of the wastrels will have left, and you will be with people who you have more in common with.
Good Luck.
Beverley.
P.S Dawn French is drop dead gorgeous. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

Thanks, teachers have been involved though but they still think it is funny to carry on. I have tried with no reaction, and it doesnt help that one of them delivers our paper.

I am glad your daughter got it all sorted out.

[Charlies Aunt]

SOPH SOPH SOPH SOPH SOPH!!!!!!

For goodness sake! When you get up in the morning the first thing you must do is go to the mirror. Stand in front of it and say aloud "You are me. You are beautiful. I love you and you are worthy of a life on this earth". Then you must say "I will face up to these people. They are nothing to me. I will hold my head up high and be proud of who I am and what I have achieved. I thank God I will never lower myself to their standards". Then you put on a piece of music that you can have a good old dance and singalong to so that you do not go to school LOOKING DOWN AND EXPECTING TO BE PICKED ON. This is exactly what bullies look out for- the more upset you look, the more they will pounce.

I think it was Christina Aguillera who sang the song about being beautiful. Listen to that and repeat the words to yourself as well.

As The Old Lady says, you have to be an oscar winning actress but the more you can do this, the more they will get fed up and find some other poor soul to pick on.

All the advice in the world won't help if you are not able to help yourself.
Give it a try. It worked for me. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

PM me if you need to.

[Soph15]

Stand in front of it and say aloud "You are me. You are beautiful. I love you and you are worthy of a life on this earth". Then you must say "I will face up to these people. They are nothing to me. I will hold my head up high and be proud of who I am and what I have achieved

How can I pretend to be something I aren't?

[Charlies Aunt]

Stand in front of it and say aloud "You are me. You are beautiful. I love you and you are worthy of a life on this earth". Then you must say "I will face up to these people. They are nothing to me. I will hold my head up high and be proud of who I am and what I have achieved

How can I pretend to be something I aren't?

Everybody is something to someone!! You must have loads of people tellling you you are good at something. I take it that is you in the middle of your photo? You have a beautiful face to start with and you have two children who obviously like being with you. Focus on this and HAVE FUN!!!!!!

[bobifier]

Stand in front of it and say aloud "You are me. You are beautiful. I love you and you are worthy of a life on this earth". Then you must say "I will face up to these people. They are nothing to me. I will hold my head up high and be proud of who I am and what I have achieved

How can I pretend to be something I aren't?

What you are relies on what you believe you are, and if you are intent on believing that you are not worth it, that's all you'll ever believe yourself to be. You've got to make yourself believe that Yopu're better than them, and, ultimately, you will be!

By, I'm philosophical today.