Nerves, What Can You Do? Options

[dembones]

I was similar to you: was fine when I was younger, then had a break from playing for a while, and when I went back to it, I've had appalling attacks of nerves whenever I've had to play any kind of exposed solo. (Regular orchestral playing, without any big solos, is okay.)

The problem with it is that you get in a cycle: because it happened last time, you're scared it will happen again, and then it does, so the next time... It's horrible, and you know rationally that it's completely psychological, but that doesn't help! So the drastic measures help you to break that cycle.

Sorry I picked on this quote because it's exactly how I felt in a nutshell (and I think you mentioned you were an oboist down the page which is partly what I'm talking about). Knowing whilst I'm playing that this is completely irrational and I get furious with myself (my grade 7 violin exam I was just staring at my hand angrily thinking "what are you trying to do to me???"). My breathings fine, I just can't stop shaking and then I get embarrassed and it gets even worse. It was actually hilarious in my exam because my bowing arm was responding no problem but my hand wasn't, which meant I bounced off the strings no end. I also play the oboe and I thought the reason I had issues with that was simply because of my breathing but it turns out not, I just can't keep my hand still. It was actually quite a surprise to find I had the same problem with the violin (last night I performed and my legs went too, even though I was playing in a string quintet!)

I only get nervous when I literally stand up in front of people, beforehand I am actually quite content and looking forward to playing (I wasn't even nervous before my violin exam I was quite looking forward to showing off my spanky new violin). I was thinking of hypnotherapy before the beta blocker, does it involve relaxation techniques before I play?

Everybody's been so helpful, I really appreciate this!

[ad_libitum]

I used to take beta blockers for panic attacks/anxiety, which worked well, although I found it difficult to concentrate on everyday tasks while I was on them. I think they were quite strong though.

Your doctor will be able to advise you on that and it's worth asking about, even only for the short term.

I have to say hypnosis never seemed to work for me. The way I have always done it is to pretend I'm in my own living room. If I'm looking directly at the piano and not around me too much, it's quite effective!

Edit : p.s - a wee nip of Hennessy doesn't do any harm either (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[Alicia Ocean]

I was thinking of hypnotherapy before the beta blocker, does it involve relaxation techniques before I play?

No. Nothing further to do.

It's like being cured of a fear of spiders (or whatever) & to be honest I can't see what I was fussed about now. Thought that's a sign of my cure.

I really can't imagine "self-hypnosis" working in such a profound and immediate and final way. Perhaps it's just me. It cost 90 pounds in total for two sessions and to me it was worth the risk of it not working. It's not really about Relaxation at all - in fact I was encouraged to feel Excited but in a happy and positive way.

[Claire21]

I really can't imagine "self-hypnosis" working in such a profound and immediate and final way. Perhaps it's just me. It cost 90 pounds in total for two sessions and to me it was worth the risk of it not working. It's not really about Relaxation at all - in fact I was encouraged to feel Excited but in a happy and positive way.

Same here. It took me four sesssions, but frankly if it gets me over the panic, it's money well spent.

[The Old Lady]

Bev, I don't want to dismiss what you say, it could work for some people (and I agree that we sometimes need to get things in perspective), but the problem with this level of nerves is that you KNOW it's totally irrational, but it happens anyway! I have done concerts in drafty old churches to an audience of old ladies who wouldn't know which end of an oboe to blow down, and sure as anything wouldn't care if I played a couple of wrong notes, but that didn't stop me wanting to run screaming from the church!

My level of nerves for my Grade 5 was such that I actually thought for a minute before I started, "shall I just walk out of here" (IMG:style_emoticons/default/blink.gif) I really considered it. Think it was the money and time and effort that stopped me.
Then I played at Leeds, which saw me with hands under cold tap a couple of turns before mine, but I did it. Stumac says that the more you do it the better it gets, so keep on playing at every opportunity.
It's funny, but the turn I did with Daisychain and Petrat, I wasn't nervous about, even though I don't normally sing solos. Maybe because I didn't care what people thought, it was meant to be awful (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)

Anyone tried what the gymnasts do?? I saw Prof Winston on TV showing how they "visualize" their moves in their heads, and then they do the move perfectly. I tried this a week before the exam, imagining me walking into the room, as cool as can be, saying hello to the examiner and sitting down and enjoying the exam. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/ill.gif)
While I can't say I enjoyed it, I think it helped alongside the light bulb moment.
If anyone can tell me how not to be scared of spiders, let me know (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)
Bev.

[keeponsinging]

I suffer very badly from nerves in my singing i had a panic attack before and nearly fainted. The poor singing teacher was just a little worried! I think i might try medication next time but i would only do it a couple of times to break the cycle
x

[dorabella x]

As regards the alcohol approach - as steward for the local ABRSM exams, I once had an adult lady to escort to examination room, she literally bounced from one side of the wall to the other all the way down the corridor! I asked her if she was OK (fearing a medical condition I may have to deal with) to which she replied that the 3 double brandies she had taken for her nerves, made her forget all her problems!!! I often wonder if she passed, and yes, I did ensure she went home by taxi!

[ad_libitum]

As regards the alcohol approach - as steward for the local ABRSM exams, I once had an adult lady to escort to examination room, she literally bounced from one side of the wall to the other all the way down the corridor! I asked her if she was OK (fearing a medical condition I may have to deal with) to which she replied that the 3 double brandies she had taken for her nerves, made her forget all her problems!!! I often wonder if she passed, and yes, I did ensure she went home by taxi!

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif) 3 double brandies would have me in a coma!

[Dulciana]

Alcohol is risky. When you're not too stressed and the atmosphere is pleasant one or two glasses of wine can get rid of the tension and leave you free to concentrate on expression rather than worry about your shaking hands not even getting the notes right. But if you're over-anxious and haven't eaten as a result, even one glass can go straight to your head and cause you to struggle over the more technical bits.

http://www.nytimes.com/2004/10/17/arts/mus...amp;oref=slogin
An article that you might find interesting, about musicians and betablockers.

[Susie]

I haven't played properly solo for a long time. But I did "volunteer", or perhaps I should say that I was volunteered to accompany at the school carol service - not just straight 4 part carols, but fancy things where the accompaniment was everything! Standing singing the first carol of the evening (played by the organist - an Oxford ex-organ scholar if you please) no words would come out, and I truly wondered how I had let myself in for it. Some how I got myself through it - and it obviously didn't show all that much because I was asked to do it again the next year! (Nerves were not quite as bad second time round, but still not good)

However, since then I have become involved in playing for church services occasionally, on an organ, and although I'm still apprehensive, not to such an extent. I think that repeated exposure to these sort of occasions must be beneficial nerves-wise, and having read all the posts, I think I would go down the hypnosis route before resorting to beta-blockers.

[dembones]

Alcohol is risky. When you're not too stressed and the atmosphere is pleasant one or two glasses of wine can get rid of the tension and leave you free to concentrate on expression rather than worry about your shaking hands not even getting the notes right. But if you're over-anxious and haven't eaten as a result, even one glass can go straight to your head and cause you to struggle over the more technical bits.

http://www.nytimes.com/2004/10/17/arts/mus...amp;oref=slogin
An article that you might find interesting, about musicians and betablockers.

Thanks! I was going to say as much as I love the idea of alcohol I have a tendency to completely lose my embouchure even after one glass, I'm such a lightweight (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

[The Old Lady]

I have found that alcohol makes me think I have played like an angel, or sung like a star, but it doesn't have that effect on the audience (IMG:style_emoticons/default/rofl.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/rofl.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/rofl.gif)
I would try anything other than pills until they were the last resort. I'm a nurse and believe me beta blockers don't suit everyone. If you do use them, try them before the performance just in case.
Bev.