Leaving the forums

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Leaving the forums

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ffliwt	Mar 12 2012, 11:03 PM Post #1
Prodigy Group: Members Posts: 1580 Joined: 17-February 07 Member No.: 9572	Not sure if many of you will know who I am, but after many years here I am leaving. I might still hover around and have a nosey (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) But won't be posting. You're the nicest bunch of people (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif) But due to a few, I no longer have any freedom of speech and everything I say can be turned into a personal attack, accusing me of being this that and the other, 'this could destroy your future career' etc.etc. It really saddens me. So I think my time here is over (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) I'm no-where near thick skinned enough for this, I give up! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/peace2.gif) Thanks for all the help and advice i've been given over the years - from before I'd ever touched a violin to now being in music college, I really wonder if I'd even be here without the inspriation and help from everyone here! So thanks! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/thanks.gif) Good luck with all your music making! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wub.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/party1.gif)

Lee King	Mar 13 2012, 06:02 AM Post #2
Advanced Member Group: Banned Posts: 349 Joined: 15-February 12 From: Das Land ohne Musik Member No.: 405979	Music is a valuable commodity, and learning to play it is enriching the world's culture. Only some sort of General Franco type fascist would attempt to make your journey in music a difficult one, and then have the cowardice to dismiss it as 'constructive criticism'. When you play violin solo at the Royal Albert Hall you will remember this...Pob lwc gyda phopeth a wnewch yn eich gyrfa cerddorol, sy NEWYDD ddechrau!

Sunrise	Mar 13 2012, 06:35 AM Post #3
Virtuoso Group: Members Posts: 3389 Joined: 7-June 10 From: Gibraltar Member No.: 106844	I'm so sorry to hear this, Ffliwt. Have you said anything to the mods? I don't want you to go and I don't see why you should.

Clari Nicki1	Mar 13 2012, 07:16 AM Post #4
Virtuoso Group: Members Posts: 3054 Joined: 8-August 06 Member No.: 7335	I am really sorry to hear this ffliwt as you have always appeared to me to be one of the sanest and loveliest posters on here. You have always reminded me of an older version of my youngest...maybe due to your instrument choice and sport choice! I hope you decide not to go.... but thanks for being a lovely member of this on line community. I for one will miss you.

sunil	Mar 13 2012, 08:01 AM Post #5
Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 202 Joined: 7-February 11 From: Peckham :) London Member No.: 205779	ffliwt, sorry to hear that you are leaving. I saw your postings in question, but never felt anything wrong in that even though I come from same ethnicity. I sincerely hope you are not leaving the forum, though it is personal choice!

maggiemay	Mar 13 2012, 08:34 AM Post #6
Maestro Group: Members Posts: 18061 Joined: 12-January 04 From: S E England Member No.: 413	I am sorry too - I think it would be a loss to the forums and I hope you will reconsider. I don't see any reason for you to go. I really don't. Hope you will reconsider.

barry-clari	Mar 13 2012, 08:42 AM Post #7
Maestro Group: Members Posts: 40564 Joined: 10-January 06 From: South East London Member No.: 5804	Occasionally, ffliwt, you'll end up in a conflict on the forum, if you post anything like regularly, however hard you try to avoid it. I know I've been involved in plenty! I don't think it's a good reason to leave completely, and I hope you'll reconsider. If you do decide to go, all the very best in the future, I'm sure you'll do fabulously! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

Listener	Mar 13 2012, 09:51 AM Post #8
Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 676 Joined: 17-February 09 Member No.: 56207	QUOTE(barry-clari @ Mar 13 2012, 08:42 AM) Occasionally, ffliwt, you'll end up in a conflict on the forum, if you post anything like regularly, however hard you try to avoid it. I know I've been involved in plenty! I don't think it's a good reason to leave completely, and I hope you'll reconsider. If you do decide to go, all the very best in the future, I'm sure you'll do fabulously! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) On the rare occasion a post irritates you, you reply with firmness and good humour. Not everyone is as balanced. Wolf-pack behaviour does happen and unfortunately tends to happen when the invariably unwitting 'offender' is vulnerable in some way; animal behaviour at its worst. Two threads active this week, at least, bear witness to the time and thought ffliwt puts in to helping others despite her demanding conservatoire studies, yet she now feels obliged to leave. We need to develop a collective and robust no-tolerance policy to wolf-pack behaviour, and leap to the defence of victims before it reaches the stage that prompts a thread like this. The temptation is to keep quiet in the hope fuss will die down but wolves don't respond to that.

Claudia's Mum	Mar 13 2012, 10:29 AM Post #9
Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 750 Joined: 18-September 06 From: London Member No.: 7704	I read the thread in question before it was edited extensively and didn't see any wolf pack behaviour. All I saw was one person who objected to some of the generalisations which Ffliwt was using and advised her not to use them on a public forum as they could be construed as racist remarks. And another person agreed. As Ffliwt's comments have now been deleted she must have agreed that it would be more sensible to do so. The matter is finished and dealt with amicably and there is no reason to leave the forum and I hope you won't.

Listener	Mar 13 2012, 10:38 AM Post #10
Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 676 Joined: 17-February 09 Member No.: 56207	QUOTE(Claudia's Mum @ Mar 13 2012, 10:29 AM) I read the thread in question before it was edited extensively and didn't see any wolf pack behaviour. All I saw was one person who objected to some of the generalisations which Ffliwt was using and advised her not to use them on a public forum as they could be construed as racist remarks. And another person agreed. As Ffliwt's comments have now been deleted she must have agreed that it would be more sensible to do so. The matter is finished and dealt with amicably and there is no reason to leave the forum and I hope you won't. "Amicably"?

Claudia's Mum	Mar 13 2012, 11:01 AM Post #11
Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 750 Joined: 18-September 06 From: London Member No.: 7704	QUOTE(Listener @ Mar 13 2012, 10:38 AM) QUOTE(Claudia's Mum @ Mar 13 2012, 10:29 AM) I read the thread in question before it was edited extensively and didn't see any wolf pack behaviour. All I saw was one person who objected to some of the generalisations which Ffliwt was using and advised her not to use them on a public forum as they could be construed as racist remarks. And another person agreed. As Ffliwt's comments have now been deleted she must have agreed that it would be more sensible to do so. The matter is finished and dealt with amicably and there is no reason to leave the forum and I hope you won't. "Amicably"? Was it not?

Misterioso	Mar 13 2012, 11:02 AM Post #12
Virtuoso Group: Members Posts: 3132 Joined: 18-July 07 From: Outer Hebrides Member No.: 13351	Like others, Ffliwt, I hope you will reconsider. But if not, you will be missed; like many others, I have appreciated your comments, and wish you all the very best. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif)

corenfa	Mar 13 2012, 11:06 AM Post #13
Virtuoso Group: Members Posts: 4218 Joined: 28-March 10 From: Here Member No.: 95861	ffliwt - I hope you'll stay, but I understand it may be hard to if you feel uncomfortable here now. The problem with policing "wolf-pack behaviour" is that it is hard to tell when someone is really being hounded and when it is simply a few people disagreeing with what one person said. I've no idea which happened here (could be neither). The danger is then that people become reluctant to disagree because they're afraid that they'll be seen as ganging up on someone. I dither a lot about whether to post dissenting opinions (including this one) because I'm afraid that it might be taken the wrong way.

Listener	Mar 13 2012, 11:34 AM Post #14
Advanced Member Group: Members Posts: 676 Joined: 17-February 09 Member No.: 56207	QUOTE(Claudia's Mum @ Mar 13 2012, 11:01 AM) QUOTE(Listener @ Mar 13 2012, 10:38 AM) QUOTE(Claudia's Mum @ Mar 13 2012, 10:29 AM) I read the thread in question before it was edited extensively and didn't see any wolf pack behaviour. All I saw was one person who objected to some of the generalisations which Ffliwt was using and advised her not to use them on a public forum as they could be construed as racist remarks. And another person agreed. As Ffliwt's comments have now been deleted she must have agreed that it would be more sensible to do so. The matter is finished and dealt with amicably and there is no reason to leave the forum and I hope you won't. "Amicably"? Was it not? Well if the net result is that a long-standing forum member feels the need to leave, then I wouldn't say it was amicable.

andante	Mar 13 2012, 11:59 AM Post #15
Prodigy Group: Members Posts: 1846 Joined: 27-April 09 Member No.: 63837	So it's ok for short standing members to leave?

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