Pupil not in, ...for first lesson! Options

[tetrachord]

So just as it says, I went round to the flat to give a ten year old what was to have been her first lesson and got no response on the buzzer. I got let in when someone just happened to be going out the downstairs door. I tried the bell and no response, it was only when I chapped on the door that a man answered it and looked completely blank to see me standing there. When I said that I was there to give a violin lesson he answered 'They've all gone out together.' I don't really know what I'm supposed to do now - never had this happen on what was supposed to be a first lesson before! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/unsure.gif)

[dolce@piano]

Well, you might be a very forgiving person, and I'd always give someone a second chance (especailly when they're not quite in the swing of it yet),, but it's hardly a great start . . .

[Misterioso]

No, hardly a propitious start! However, I think I would give them a second chance. When my son began lessons with a new teacher, I got the time wrong and forgot to take him! It could be that they are feeling really bad about it now, and are not sure how to put things right. Why not phone to see what happened, and make another arrangement for next week? Surely they couldn't forget again.....?!

[miffy]

Yes I would give them a ring. You'll be able to gage by the reaction whether they are serious about lessons as a commitment or not.
There's a good chance the mother is feeling highly embarrassed right now (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wacko.gif)

[Scooby Doo]

Well there are any number of possibilities as to what went wrong, but I think the onus is on them to ring you if they have got it wrong, and they clearly know what has happened as you turned up and spoke to the chap.

Personally I'd be fairly reluctant to continue with someone who wasn't bothered enough to be there for a first lesson.

[chraze1]

Slightly different scenario, I had a phone call from a father re giving his son piano lessons, we arranged a mutually convenient time and they turned up, father stayed and lesson went ahead, that was 6 weeks ago, we've only had 1 other lesson since!, one week the father was running late from work, another week the boy wasn't feeling well!, another week - they forgot it was parents night and wouldn't make the lesson, another week it just so happened there was a big football match on at the same time as his lesson, and he suddenly couldn't make it that week either!
I made the mistake of saying that lessons could be paid for weekly for the first 4 and thereafter it would be fees payable on the first lesson of the month. Never seen them for weeks and I'm out of pocket! I've now included in my terms and conditions that if 3 consecutive lessons are cancelled in any one month, I reserve the right to terminate without written notice.
If you decide (like I did) to give second or third chances, I'd be really careful if I were you. Make sure you have your terms and conditions in your hand which you ask them to read and sign whilst you are giving the lesson.
Good luck

[Dugazon]

(...), one week the father was running late from work, another week the boy wasn't feeling well!, another week - they forgot it was parents night and wouldn't make the lesson, another week it just so happened there was a big football match on at the same time as his lesson, and he suddenly couldn't make it that week either!
I made the mistake of saying that lessons could be paid for weekly for the first 4 and thereafter it would be fees payable on the first lesson of the month. Never seen them for weeks and I'm out of pocket! I've now included in my terms and conditions that if 3 consecutive lessons are cancelled in any one month, I reserve the right to terminate without written notice.

Simply introducing a notice period for cancellations would solve that problem, at least partly. Mine is 48 hrs, end of, virtually no exceptions (minor illness included, sorry). I understand things can crop up short-term, and looked at individually, they might seem like people should be "let off", but if I made an exception for late notice because of a traffic jam, working overtime or belated notice of parents' evenings every time, I couldn't pay my bills.

I also know of teachers who now take payment in advance for the very first lesson via PayPal. I am not doing it (yet), but I can understand why some people do.
It happens more often than you'd think that students don't show up to their first lesson and don't seem to think there's anything wrong with that. I appreciate we all make honest mistakes, and if that's the case, a solution will certainly be found - I would at least assume the student apologises (and maybe even offers to pay - what a pleasant dream). Very often though, it's just complete disregard for the value of the teacher's time I'm afraid.

[tetrachord]

Ok, I decided to check my emails before coming back on here to see if the mum had contacted me about the missed lesson. Slightly weirdly she's sent me another email through the same site she had used to contact me in the first place asking if I could give her daughter violin lessons. The tone of the message suggests she may not be aware I am the same teacher who came round today - she starts off by introducing herself and telling me where she lives (which I already know being as I was round there earlier) before asking if I can teach her daughter - nothing to suggest we'd already made arrangements for me to do so! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/huh.gif)

[Alicia Ocean]

I had one like that last year. The new pupil didn't show up at the arranged time. Then sometime later sent an email enquiring about lessons. I figure they think it a good way out of having to explain themselves. There's nothing new under the sun though.

These days I only take new pupils via an email exchange. That way they can't pretend to have not got the message or got the facts wrong about when and where.

[lorraineliyanage]

Ok, I decided to check my emails before coming back on here to see if the mum had contacted me about the missed lesson. Slightly weirdly she's sent me another email through the same site she had used to contact me in the first place asking if I could give her daughter violin lessons.

That is really weird - I'd probably just avoid this parent, sounds like she's a bit of a nut! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/ohmy.gif)

[miffy]

I think avoid..

[tetrachord]

Yeah, fair enough. Suppose I should be glad it's come to light now rather than after lessons got going (if they had done)...

[Englebert]

(...), one week the father was running late from work, another week the boy wasn't feeling well!, another week - they forgot it was parents night and wouldn't make the lesson, another week it just so happened there was a big football match on at the same time as his lesson, and he suddenly couldn't make it that week either!
I made the mistake of saying that lessons could be paid for weekly for the first 4 and thereafter it would be fees payable on the first lesson of the month. Never seen them for weeks and I'm out of pocket! I've now included in my terms and conditions that if 3 consecutive lessons are cancelled in any one month, I reserve the right to terminate without written notice.

Simply introducing a notice period for cancellations would solve that problem, at least partly. Mine is 48 hrs, end of, virtually no exceptions (minor illness included, sorry). I understand things can crop up short-term, and looked at individually, they might seem like people should be "let off", but if I made an exception for late notice because of a traffic jam, working overtime or belated notice of parents' evenings every time, I couldn't pay my bills.

I also know of teachers who now take payment in advance for the very first lesson via PayPal. I am not doing it (yet), but I can understand why some people do.
It happens more often than you'd think that students don't show up to their first lesson and don't seem to think there's anything wrong with that. I appreciate we all make honest mistakes, and if that's the case, a solution will certainly be found - I would at least assume the student apologises (and maybe even offers to pay - what a pleasant dream). Very often though, it's just complete disregard for the value of the teacher's time I'm afraid.

Totally agree. A cancellation policy is a must. Mine is also 48 hours and like you, there are NO EXCEPTIONS - not even for illnesses.

[owainsutton]

First lessons can be chaos. With younger pupils, it can be the first time they (child or parent) have dealt with a regular weekly commitment in this way.

This is a good reason to actively offer a free initial lesson/meeting/consultation. Whoever is actually travelling to whom, it takes some of the pressure away, by dealing with any "Arrggggh no parking spaces/sat-nav going bonkers/not enough petrol" panics, along with the nerves most kids have when of meeting a new teacher, well before money changes hands!

[dolce@piano]

Ok, I decided to check my emails before coming back on here to see if the mum had contacted me about the missed lesson. Slightly weirdly she's sent me another email through the same site she had used to contact me in the first place asking if I could give her daughter violin lessons. The tone of the message suggests she may not be aware I am the same teacher who came round today - she starts off by introducing herself and telling me where she lives (which I already know being as I was round there earlier) before asking if I can teach her daughter - nothing to suggest we'd already made arrangements for me to do so! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/huh.gif)

This is quite weird.

When was it sent ? Shortly after the first email ? Or after you had already scheduled the first lesson ?

If the first, maybe she was emailing several people and just mistakenly did you twice.

If the second, she shouldn't be contacting anyone else if she's agreed to have lessons with you.

Did you ever speak to her by phone ? (You can tell alot from speaking to someone, even on the phone). If not, I'd be suspicious.

Yes, I always give people a second chance but, on the other hand, if you make an arrangement to go to somebody's house, that person knows that you are out at that given time. You can see where I'm going with this train of thought . . .