Family support, Are your family supportive or not? Options

[Blackbow]

After two marriages to men who belittled my achievements to make them feel better about themselves, one of the reason I have been with my current partner so long is his unfailing encouragement in whatever I want to do, however harebrained. He was shocked when I said I had bought a violin because I had never shown the slightest interest in music before, (probably more shocked then when I told him I'd bought a block of flats or when I came home with a motorbike), but nonetheless very supportive. He was even more shocked when I didn't chuck it in after six months, but pleased. He has even got used to me taking a violin on holiday with me.

Everyone else I know seems to be somewhere between slightly puzzled to openly admiring and even voicing jealousy that I can play, (at least somewhat), and they can't. I don't think anyone has said anything negative about it.

Personally I can't think why anyone would criticise. I always think that having a hobby, no matter how bizarre or even boring to other people is better than not having a hobby. I know people someone who has a room full of Spiderman artifacts, and another with an encyclopaedic knowledge of numberplates. Good for them I say. If it gives them pleasure why not? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

[jazzycat]

I consider myself very fortunate in that my husband absolutely loves my playing and is very proud of my musical achievements. He listens to my practice and offers helpful comments where he can [he professes to be tone-deaf but isn't at all (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) ]; and he always comes to band and orchestra concerts and usually brings a few friends. I couldn't have more support.

The cat, on the other hand, loathes my playing wind instruments - but she will sit with me while I play the piano (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

[Appassionata]

My Mum is very supportive of my music, however my Dad isn't. He has never heard or seen me play and when I sent him a link of me playing clarinet on Youtube with my band, he thought I was one of the flautists! I've never told him I even play the flute. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/huh.gif)

I am lucky though as my Mum and stepdad put up with hours of me practicing my various instruments every evening (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[lottie]

I consider myself very fortunate in that my husband absolutely loves my playing and is very proud of my musical achievements. He listens to my practice and offers helpful comments where he can [he professes to be tone-deaf but isn't at all (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) ]; and he always comes to band and orchestra concerts and usually brings a few friends. I couldn't have more support.

The cat, on the other hand, loathes my playing wind instruments - but she will sit with me while I play the piano (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

I think this is lovely (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

I mentioned earlier my husband does support me to an extent but I have only ever played viola in one concert with the local amateur orchestra. It was a summer evening affair in a beautiful little country church. None of my friends and family came and after the concert when the families were all hugging kissing each other, enjoying the home-made buffet and chattering away with their friends I have to admit I have rarely felt so lonely. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) I had spent six months trying to get to know some of them but understandably they were busy with their own groups so I just slipped away. I loved playing in that concert though and stopped the car at a viewpoint on the way home so I could enjoy the delight a little longer before going home to normal life!!

I didn't go back to that orchestra in the end but my husband doesn't enjoy 'my' kind of music anyway.

[Tenor Viol]

I consider myself very fortunate in that my husband absolutely loves my playing and is very proud of my musical achievements. He listens to my practice and offers helpful comments where he can [he professes to be tone-deaf but isn't at all (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) ]; and he always comes to band and orchestra concerts and usually brings a few friends. I couldn't have more support.

The cat, on the other hand, loathes my playing wind instruments - but she will sit with me while I play the piano (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

I think this is lovely (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

I mentioned earlier my husband does support me to an extent but I have only ever played viola in one concert with the local amateur orchestra. It was a summer evening affair in a beautiful little country church. None of my friends and family came and after the concert when the families were all hugging kissing each other, enjoying the home-made buffet and chattering away with their friends I have to admit I have rarely felt so lonely. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) I had spent six months trying to get to know some of them but understandably they were busy with their own groups so I just slipped away. I loved playing in that concert though and stopped the car at a viewpoint on the way home so I could enjoy the delight a little longer before going home to normal life!!

I didn't go back to that orchestra in the end but my husband doesn't enjoy 'my' kind of music anyway.

How sad.

My mum goes to most of my concerts (my dad did when he was alive). Sometimes travel logistics prevent that from happening. It can be underwhelming when you have no-one to share the experience with - there's nothing flatter than just going home on your own after a concert. We do make a point in the choral society of having a glass of wine and a few savoury nibbles at the end of concerts - our MD is keen that we have a chance to "decompress" and we're careful that people aren't left alone.

[Lemontree]

I guess, by now, everyone around me is used to me doing things, whether it is woodworking, sewing, handcrafting, tap dancing, creating art works, cooking, playing chess, or whatever else my mind fathoms to do. So, nobody really was surprised when I picked up an old interest after 26 yrs and decided to make a profession out of it (at my age!).

But I have made the experience in my life that there are few people who work that way and much more of the sort that get a family, go to work, have some people over, occassionally do something, and mostly end up in front of a tv. I don't even own a tv. I consider myself luck?, if there is enough time left to read a good book. Since I know, how little others can do, I don't really care what their opinion is.

I do care about the opinion of my friends (friends; not associates), of which I have quite a few. And our general consenus is that we all know the process of learning something. One of my friends is a dancer, the other a horse rider, and one is an actress. I only have one friend who works the other way, but we know each other since we were in our early teens, so she is used to it and respects what I do, although she doesn't know where I find the time to do it all. And this process of learning something is for many an ordeal they don't want to have in their life. I don't know if it was school that did them in, but for some reason they would love to be able to do things but without the way that it needs to get there. And many of those envy those who do go all the way.

I once met a girl, who wanted to be a friend, but she couldn't deal with me doing thing. She was so jealous. She always said: wow, it's amazing how many things you are able to do, I would like that, too. And I said in return, well, you just have to start somewhere. If you never make a beginning, you'll never find out, whether or not you even like it or have a talent for it. She never did. Surficive to say, that this friendship didn't last long.

I sometimess wonder, what my neighbors think. I try not to annoy them too much. However, I do play 2 hours six days a week. Funnily though, I seem to have set an example. Making music is hard work. Removing mistakes, getting the skill. Well, recently our 15 apartments city house has gained one african drummer, one singer, one guitar or contrabass (haven't figured that out yet), and one piano. All adults. So I guess, in some way, they approve.