All Good Things Must Come To An End :( Options

[nicki_flute]

Well, I found out this morning, that my amazing music teacher will not be teaching me next year. It is due to cirumstances out of her control, but I'm just really shocked and upset, for both her and myself.

She took me on 3 years ago, when I was an ok flautist, but had some major weaknesses, and didn't really know much. 3 years later and I am a completely different player. After so many rubbish teachers, I finally found her, and have gained so much.

I know some people would say she's just a teacher, but she's done so much for me, and helped me. Although I could possibly have the odd lesson with her she lives in a different county, over an hour away.

I'm just upset at her leaving, she's a lovely person, and then I am worried about the future. It is like does someone not want me to get to university or something, my 2 History teachers have left, she's had to leave, and I don't want to go backwards in my playing, I've come so far, and I don't want my technique and musicality suffering when my flute playing is the best it's ever been.

*Sigh*

[katyjay]

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) What a shame to lose such a good teacher.

By "not teaching you next year" do you mean after Christmas? Or next school year?

If it's the latter, that's when you'd be off to Uni anyway, so a change would have to happen at that point whether she was going or not. If it's the former, then that change has happened a little earlier than expected.

That doesn't mean you'll forget the things she's taught you, those will stay with you wherever you go next for lessons. And part of developing musically is learning to be less dependent on your teacher however good she is.

[nicki_flute]

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) What a shame to lose such a good teacher.

By "not teaching you next year" do you mean after Christmas? Or next school year?

If it's the latter, that's when you'd be off to Uni anyway, so a change would have to happen at that point whether she was going or not. If it's the former, then that change has happened a little earlier than expected.

That doesn't mean you'll forget the things she's taught you, those will stay with you wherever you go next for lessons. And part of developing musically is learning to be less dependent on your teacher however good she is.

Oh, as from January. I know I would have been in uni anyway, but it's just a shock, and she's so good...

I just really don't want her to leave

[sarah-flute]

Nicki, I know how much you like your teacher and how sad you were anyway that you'd have to leav her when you went to uni, but you're a GOOD flautist, and that isn't suddenly going to change because your teacher changes. Don't forget the hard work YOU have put in over the last few years, your teacher has been a great inspiration and help to you, but you have also done the donkey work and got yourself to the level you're now playing at.

*hug*

And you can always keep in touch with her.

[nicki_flute]

Nicki, I know how much you like your teacher and how sad you were anyway that you'd have to leav her when you went to uni, but you're a GOOD flautist, and that isn't suddenly going to change because your teacher changes. Don't forget the hard work YOU have put in over the last few years, your teacher has been a great inspiration and help to you, but you have also done the donkey work and got yourself to the level you're now playing at.

*hug*

And you can always keep in touch with her.

I know, I've put in hard work, but I really want a top quality flute teacher, and my teacher was that. I might end up going to my conductor for lessons, but it won't be the same.

I still will be able to keep in touch I suppose. Maybe I'm making a big deal over it...(IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif)

[maggiemay]

Nicki - I'm so sorry to hear this news and I can understand how bereft you feel - or expect to feel.

A couple of pluses - she's seeing you through your grade 8, no ?

As others have said, you have learnt a lot from her, and you appreciate that - imagine if you hadn't had that opportunity. I'm sure she has been delighted to have such a keen and responsive student, and it seems unlikely you will lose touch. You're not going to lose all that skill, having done all you've done, and reached grade 8 level, if you happen to be without lessons for a few weeks.

However, whatever we can say on the positive side, change is always unsettling. Keep in mind the possibility that you might be fortunate enough to find someone even more amazing as a teacher at some point, even if not immediately. There is a saying "when one door shuts, another door opens" -

difficulty is, we can never imagine what might be on the other side of that door.
Try to accept the inevitable and wait and see!

[Cyrilla]

I'd just like to endorse everything everyone else has said already.

I really feel for you, Nicki, because I know what it's like to lose a wonderful teacher. But, believe me, you will never lose what she has given you - personally, technically, musically - and you will never forget her. She will continue to inspire you - especially if you ever teach yourself.

And, as maggie says, it IS an old cliche about one door closing and another opening - but it's true - especially the bit about not knowing what's on the other side of the new door! It's what happens in life, time and time again.

Do everything you can to find another excellent teacher - you won't want to put up with second best after her. Maybe you will wait until you're at uni before finding a permanent one. Maybe you could still see your old teacher once a month from January?? You will have done your Grade 8 and that would keep you ticking over. There are so many helpful people on this forum - andante and Bagpuss immediately spring to mind in the 'helpful flautist' category! And I'm sure Bag and I can come and see you again and I know Bag would help in whatever way she can.

So try not to despair. It's just a nasty shock right now, but try to hang on in there. Just be sure that there WILL be another door that opens...

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[nicki_flute]

Nicki - I'm so sorry to hear this news and I can understand how bereft you feel - or expect to feel.

A couple of pluses - she's seeing you through your grade 8, no ?

As others have said, you have learnt a lot from her, and you appreciate that - imagine if you hadn't had that opportunity. I'm sure she has been delighted to have such a keen and responsive student, and it seems unlikely you will lose touch. You're not going to lose all that skill, having done all you've done, and reached grade 8 level, if you happen to be without lessons for a few weeks.

However, whatever we can say on the positive side, change is always unsettling. Keep in mind the possibility that you might be fortunate enough to find someone even more amazing as a teacher at some point, even if not immediately. There is a saying "when one door shuts, another door opens" -

difficulty is, we can never imagine what might be on the other side of that door.
Try to accept the inevitable and wait and see!

Yes, I'll have her for the competition, Grade 8 and my music teacher said that I could do my A2 recital before Christmas.

It's just sad, and I didn't expect it. I nearly lost her last September, and that was bad enough, and I had warning.

[andante_in_c]

Sorry to hear the news, Nicki. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) A similar thing happened to me after Grade 8, and I found it difficult switching to another teacher during my Upper Sixth year. I hope the right person comes along for you - yes, it is rather like finding a partner. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[nicki_flute]

Sorry to hear the news, Nicki. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) A similar thing happened to me after Grade 8, and I found it difficult switching to another teacher during my Upper Sixth year. I hope the right person comes along for you - yes, it is rather like finding a partner. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

My teacher said she could teach me, but she lives over an hour away...I need to consider the options

Hi Nicki, sorry to hear about your flute teacher leaving. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) As I said earlier, at least you don't have to change teacher before your grade 8 abd the competition. Has she suggested other teachers who might be able to replace her? Your next teacher might be just as good. I know how upsetting it can be to lose a teacher like that, but you have been lucky that you didn't lose her last year and if she leaves in January, it's only a few months before you would have been leaving her.

My Music teacher thought of someone, and my flute teacher has heard of her...but hmmpphh

[nicki_flute]

Maybe you could continue with your present teacher and arrange a fortnightly lesson?? I know people who travel for 3 hours for a lesson!

Maybe...on a Thursday afternoon or something, I'll see..

[Deborah]

It's happened to me a couple of times, although in each case it was because I moved, rather than because the teacher moved. It's not fun getting used to a new teacher's quirks, but we all have to face change at some point.

As has been pointed out, you'd only have her for a couple more terms in any case, by which time you will have taken (and passed (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)) your Grade 8; am I right in thinking that your final exam goal after this is your A2 recital? Given the workload and examload that A-levels have, perhaps a longer lesson once a fortnight (as has been suggested), is just what the doctor ordered.

As one door closes, another opens - this could be the opportunity you need to find an even better teacher. I know that such a teacher might not seem to exist at the moment, but prepared to be surprised. At the risk of stating the obvious, ask your current teacher if she can recommend anyone.

Oh, and stop worrying (IMG:style_emoticons/default/dry.gif) I caught sight of my pointy stick yesterday!

[notmusimum]

Oh Nicki I feel for you! I'd try and stay with your current teacher even on an adhoc basis if you can. To change in Feb and then again in Sept is probably not a good idea.

Good luck whatever you decide.

[Rainbow]

Oh Nicki, I'm so sorry to hear this (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif) I agree with what the other posters have said though - it's what you've learned from her that's important and you will continue to learn and you're still a good musician. And I know you'll keep in touch with her.

I had to stop having lessons with my old viola teacher when I left secondary school and I was really upset but my new teacher is good - very different, certainly, but still good.

[moomalade]

I am also really sorry about this as well Nicki, when I left my old piano teacher to move to college I felt like I had lost my teacher and a friend. You could try a new teacher, you never know she might turn out to be really good as well. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sad.gif)