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> Music Jokes......, What's your favourite?
arthur
post Nov 16 2007, 02:29 PM
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Mine is this (with apologies to Gershwin!)


You say Carm - eee - na
I say Carm - eye - na
Let's Carl the whole thing Orff


A (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)
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vectistim
post Nov 16 2007, 03:19 PM
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This sounds like a slippery slope, before we know where we are there will be thousands of viola jokes.
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snhs
post Nov 16 2007, 03:48 PM
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And whats wrong with that? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)
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vectistim
post Nov 16 2007, 03:59 PM
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The last time I took my viola out of its case I found the C string had gone.

All right then there now follows a viola joke, followed by a limerick:

Q: How do you keep your violin from being stolen.
A: Put it in a viola case


Up in Heaven, George H. and J. C.
Meet at least once a week, for high tea.
In December, the din
Of "Messiahs" wears thin,
So they watch game shows on the TV.
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JulieCSM
post Nov 16 2007, 04:01 PM
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QUOTE(vectistim @ Nov 16 2007, 03:59 PM) *

The last time I took my viola out of its case I found the C string had gone.



I must be thick, I don't get that.
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vectistim
post Nov 16 2007, 04:15 PM
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QUOTE(JulieCSM @ Nov 16 2007, 04:01 PM) *

QUOTE(vectistim @ Nov 16 2007, 03:59 PM) *

The last time I took my viola out of its case I found the C string had gone.



I must be thick, I don't get that.


Sorry, it wasn't a joke but the truth, I suspect if I open it again at least one more will have gone.
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JulieCSM
post Nov 16 2007, 04:16 PM
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Why was the piano invented?
So the musician would have a place to put his beer.

---

How do you tell if a tenor is dead?
The wine bottle is still full and the comics haven't been touched.

---

How many basses does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They're so macho they prefer to walk in the dark and bang their shins.

---

Minimum safe distances between street musicians and the public:

Violinist: 25 feet
Bad Violinist: 50 feet
Tone Deaf Guitar Player who knows 3 chords: 75 feet
15 year-old Electric Guitar Player with Nirvana fixation: 100 feet
Accordionist: 60 miles

---
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Deborah
post Nov 16 2007, 04:17 PM
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Q. How many clarinettists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Only one, but it takes ages to find the right bulb.
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fsharpminor
post Nov 16 2007, 04:24 PM
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QUOTE(JulieCSM @ Nov 16 2007, 04:16 PM) *

Minimum safe distances between street musicians and the public:

Violinist: 25 feet
Bad Violinist: 50 feet
Tone Deaf Guitar Player who knows 3 chords: 75 feet
15 year-old Electric Guitar Player with Nirvana fixation: 100 feet
Accordionist: 60 miles

---


?? Bagpipe player ?? Half way round the world !
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Ms.Fiddle
post Nov 16 2007, 04:55 PM
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'What's the difference between a bull and an orchestra?'



'A bull has the horns at the front and the a$$h*le at the back.'










Actually everytime I put a violin under my chin it's a joke...
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John Willett
post Nov 16 2007, 05:37 PM
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Bagpipes - they are wonderful.








They are the perfect kindling for an Accordion fire. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)
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BBTOTW
post Nov 16 2007, 05:51 PM
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Q What do violas and doormats have in common?
A It doesn't matter if you tread on them.... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)
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pianoboe
post Nov 16 2007, 06:07 PM
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Oh dear. Music jokes. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)
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barry-clari
post Nov 16 2007, 08:09 PM
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QUOTE(Deborah @ Nov 16 2007, 04:17 PM) *

Q. How many clarinettists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Only one, but it takes ages to find the right bulb.


You beat me to it Deborah, that's the joke I was going to post! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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Rosemary7391
post Nov 16 2007, 08:46 PM
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Hey, at least we clarinettists don't spend aaaagges adjusting bulbs to be exactly right, not like some people! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)
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