Music + Friends, how do you cope? Options

[Mini_mo]

I can sympthasise with this, Ella-not so much for music, but I'm in year eleven and dance twenty hours a week (during normal time, that doesn't include extra rehearsals and practice time!)

and you play 2 instruments?! Do you sleep? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

I've been playing flute for years, my friends have never taken any interest in my music, never come to any of the concerts I play in even when I'm doing solos and I got used to it, they just didn't like orchestral music and I accepted that. But last year one of my friends decided to take up flute which was fine, but then one of my friends listens to her practise every time and takes so much interest in her playing! I feel so rejected and can't understand why she takes interest in her and not me.

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/thereThere.gif)

I think that as you get older accepting that people do not share the same views/interests/passions comes more easily. I no longer care what people think about my interests, I just do them. If they like them great, if they dont fine! I'm sure I would have thought differently 20 years ago, when I perhaps needed to seek greater approval from my peers and friends.

[Neil Quinn]

It's an interesting point regarding wanting our friends to be interested in what we do.

I generally have my head full of music most of the time. I recall the film "Fever Pitch" (based on the Nick Horny book) where the protagonist is obsessed with Arsenal. He spends all his time thinking about the team, the fixtures, the outcomes and the possbilities of them winning the league etc. Anyhow, if I recall correctly it goes like this. He is looking in a window of some shop and his girlfriend asks what he is thinking about. We men love to be asked that question (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)

Anyhow, he realises that he constantly talks about football and feels a bit guilty, so although he was actually thinking about Arsenal he lies and says some other random topic, hoping that he won't seem so singularly obsessed with Arsenal and that the conversation will just fade away. Sadly his girlfriend takes some interest in this random topic and he has an awkward time trying to maintain a conversation before admitting that he was actually thinking about Arsenal again.

If I replaced "Arsenal" with "music" that pretty much sums me up. Unsurprisingly most "normal" people don't have that same level of interest. On occasions where I find someone with a similar level of interest I enjoy an in-depth conversation with them, but most of the time I live in my own little music world. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)

N

[jojo]

I think that the quick and only answer is to just 'accept it' as it is.
My family/friends also don't show any interest, well actually ONE friend does, I visit her twice a year and she always says to me to 'make sure' I take my double bass and violin with me to practice in front of her (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)

but yes, anyway, I just 'accept it', I have 'this place' (the forums) which is full of virtual friends who are very interested and share my joys/desperations, some I have even met in real life (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

if it wasn't for these forums I'd feel quite lonely actually (IMG:style_emoticons/default/ph34r.gif)

[Solari]

That's why I made piano 'fwends' on here (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wave.gif)

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(IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wave.gif)

Must say I'd have absolutely no musical friends if it wasn't for meeting some top notch peeps on here (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[Fran*Piano]

I can sympthasise with this, Ella-not so much for music, but I'm in year eleven and dance twenty hours a week (during normal time, that doesn't include extra rehearsals and practice time!)

and you play 2 instruments?! Do you sleep? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

Not much! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif) but on a serious note, my dancing comes first, hence why neither my piano or violin playing is as good as it could be! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

[notmusimum]

Ella my daughter and her school friends laugh about their different interests and mutually tease one another over them. She doesn't like the sort of pop music some of them are into but they don't all like the same stuff.

They moan a bit when she isn't able to go out with them on a Saturday but more because they want her company. They often rearrange things around people in the group. I'm actually quite proud of her school friends as they always invite one of her music friends when they arrange an outing. This is someone who isn't from the same school.

I suppose Emsoboe is lucky that she has a range of musical friends outside school. She's also had a lot of support from her form for her musicality and they are interested in what she can do. It think this partly because school aren't generally.

A few weeks ago she asked one of her best friends to go to a concert. I was surprised that she accepted and she has been with us to concerts that daughter has performed in recently.

I agree with others who think that maybe you just have to accept your differences and enjoy your hobbies whatever they may be.

[Martin.Walters]

Looking at Ella`s grades, this is much more than an interest but a way of life. A career is looming.

Those grades already adequate for university entry ! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
On top of that your doing GCSE`s !
I find it most interesting and inspiring! ~ So much so im going to attempt to learn some more instruments !

the differences in peoples character and way of life makes such a difference in what they feel is acceptable in society.. or general personal interest.
Most teens in school follow the leader. ~ In an essence, your a leader of your own being. You give them 2 years where they have to my study type decisions and less of the playground school environment they will have a different attitude. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) If they dont, you simply tell them this is what I want, this is my future.

I wanted to do music in school, but couldnt play an instrument which I thought was essential for the GCSE. I took business studies instead (IMG:style_emoticons/default/unsure.gif) ~ 4 & 1/2 years later I am pursing my dream!

[bassoongirl]

Having known most of my friends for about 5 years now they have finally stopped asking me why I can't come to the cinema or a party in the holiday. They just say "It's music isn't it"
My friends and I just tease each other about our differences in intrests and then go on to discuss something else!
Most of my friends have never seen me play an instrument-they just take my word for it!!