I'm a little embarrassed to ask this, but I need help, my confidence has hit rock bottom. I cannot even play a scale in front of my tutor anymore never mind play a piece. I don't know whats happened, I used to love playing in front of people and although I suffered from nerves it was never bad, I used to use the adreniline to boast my performance.
Now I think it's sad cause I'm at music college and should be loving it and improving loads whereas with piano and all aspects of music I have lost the enthusiasm that I had. I worked really hard to get where I am, and can't believe thats I've went from such a positive confident person to this.
I'm so sorry for the rant, but I have to get some advice from others who maybe have been in the same situation. I miss playing piano and playing it for me, not being paranoid that others are judging me. I want the enthusiasm back. I'm not giving up music, but I don't really know how to progress further being in this type of negative mood.
Once again I'm really sorry about the rant.
Thanks PSL

Often the ego gets in the way - and creates fear of making mistakes and not living up to some preconceived standard. It is why most of us play better in private practice than in performance.

The answer is to put your attention entirely into the act of creating the music.

Easier said than done - but it is true.

I think the summer holidays coming up are just what you need - in all things in life where we apply ourselves consistently sometimes you just need a break.

Not necessarily a complete break from music (although a week or 2 if you're going away won't hurt and might help) but the opportunity to play things that you want to play for yourself, and maybe if you feel up to it perform some of them for friends before you go back to college in September.

When you are really focusing intensely on something for a prolonged period of time, the brain needs space and time away to file it away and process it and if you don't give it that you can get frustrated as things get stressed and go wrong.

I used to see this alot when my daughter was swimming competitively, there was always someone suffering from 'burn out' and a small break or change of focus would help enormously.

In addition to the above advice talk to your teacher about it.
Just opening up and saying how you feel about it can help and your teacher will have some ideas to help to get you over this.

I went through a patch for about two weeks last year when I totally lost my enthusiasm for the piano, though I continued to play the organ.
I decided just not to worry about it and not play, then eventually I got in the mood again.
I think many of us go through episodes like this, your enthusiasm will return in its own good time.

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Hey
Thanks for all the advice! Very much appreciated
I think it will be good when the summer break comes, that way I am still practising but there is no pressure and I will probably find I relax more and notice an improvement.
This started around October last year with just getting worse nerves than usual and gradually got worse until my confidence in all aspects of music was down. I don't know whats caused it though, I think if I could get to the bottom of why my confidence suddenly went very low then I would be able to deal with it alot more easily.
I maybe thought it was because for 6 months before I started college, I practised non stop and I did improve alot that I maybe just burnt out a bit, and need a break to get the enthusiasm back.
Has anybody else ever suffered from this problem and how did you resolve it?
Thanks PSL