Argggggg

I've caught this horrid cold-bug that's going around and I'm really ill. I just wandered round the house all night last night in my dressing gown sneezing everywhere and finally went to bed at 4am. I've just taken a lemsip and feel sick.

Bleaughhhh

My nose sounds like the dogs' squeaky toy and I sneezed the newspaper right out of my hands!!!!! I daren't practice in case I drop my violin because I'm so wobbly....

(moan over.. sorry.. just a bit of self-pity.... aaaaaaachhhhoooooooooo!!!!)

my parents wont let me dance, and are taking me out of college.


this weekend has been crushing to say the least.

Argh I have a cold, my eyes are all sore and every time I blink it hurts....

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Thank you noodle, it's bery nice of you to tink of me (aaaaaachoooooooo!!!!!! )

It is amazing how the actions of one person can have so much power over you... I do feel quite alone now in terms of people I can talk to, people who I consider friends.
The girl I called my best friend, a couple of weeks ago, for some unknown reason, started to completely ignore me, and just me, avoid me and when she had to communicate insult me. And would not tell me, or anyone else, why.
It would now seem that she just got bored of me, decided she didn't like me any more and didn't even have the decency to tell me. She just completely blocked me out of her life.
And now, when I'm feeling a bit down, stressed and nervous about certain things that I really don't have anyone to talk to. All the people I would consider my best friends, or those I could talk to, either live the other end of the country or are just rather distant... they are all still friends with this particular person and since then it just seems that there's something holding back between us.
I just want a hug and to chat to someone about everything, but there's no one I can. And I still don't understand how overnight she went from being my best friend to completely ignoring me.

School is weird, and girls can be especially weird at school

Why don't you write her a letter and ask her what the matter is? What about your other friends? Maybe they can shed some light? It could be something really small like a misunderstanding. The annoying thing is when people "sulk" and won't let you know. I can't stand sulking

Just looking at your profile pic - I think you have the same glasses as me

**hug**

*hug* I know it's not the same online, Anna, and that 'real' friends are vital, but I know how you feel. Please feel free to PM me at any time if you want someone to talk to. Finding out who your real friends are is often a horrible experience, but if she is treating you like this now then you're probably better off without her. Sounds really harsh but I think it makes sense.

Thanks

I'm thinking I will write her a letter... I thought I'd got over it, but I obviously haven't so that's probably the best idea. Other friends have tried asking her, but apparently she just brushed it off and didn't really give an answer. I think they've now just accpeted it, it doesn't directly affect them much any more.
The really weird thing is it doesn't seem like sulking. To start with I was quite worried about her as she obviously wasn't fine, but now it seems she's just fine, so I really don't know, the whole situation is just really strange.

Thanks Fiona - no, it's not harsh and I know it's right. To be honest what's getting me is not knowing - in some ways it would have been better had we had a proper fight...

D-String, girls are weird at school, and actually I've just been talking to a friend of mine about an issue just like that - one of my friends; E went on a music trip to school and her other friend; L just started ignoring her... and she didn't know why, everytime she asked she was just brushed off - months later things just slid back to normal... when E asked L what had gone on, L just said "oh I thought you were getting a bit arrogant being first clarinet" - and we're supposedly too old for that stuff! *Hugs* I know it hurts.

Pour moi, I'm really miserable. I've had a cold, and my voice went for ages, it's been going funny on and off since before Christmas, and now I feel like I can barely sing a note this week - because the sore throat is back without warning.
I was asked to sing a solo for someone's A-Level music coursework a while ago, and I was really proud and flattered and happy about it - turns out they've just got someone else to do it without mentioning it to me... I know it wasn't exactly a solid promise - but she asked me to do it... and it makes me feel like my voice is rubbish (and the girl has only heard it at its best!). I'm worried about the theory exam on Wednesday because I just feel unmusical and stupid and rubbish. Sigh.

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What happened?

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Edited to remove angry ranting...

Erm, sorry to point out the obvious, but how can she possible teach a grade 5 pupil if she hasn't even got grade 2?



Same here

Also edited to remove more of the angry ranting.

I reckon it is better for me to actually talk to the people involved rather than post it on here. Thanks for listening those who read and replied!

Difficult situation, I do sympathise.

You can't really tell pupils that another teacher doesn't teach properly - even more tricky when it's your mother and so close to home !

Hope you are able to keep your pupil.

Had a chat, and am apparently having a blip. Give me a couple of good services and things will be better again.
To be honest, this week was a bad time to have a blip. Humph

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Well maybe

MTT, I know it's your recital tommorrow, but if the weather in Ripon is like it is here its sunny.

Pick up your coat. Put on stoat shoes or boots, and go for an hours walk in the Yorkshire countryside. You can escape it from Ripon very easily.

On your return make yourself a warm drink a sit down.

Don't even think of recital for a bit.

Only once you've taken this break do you go back and practise. You will benefit, especially for tommorrow. It will unscamble your brain.

You've got a Trio-sonata to play so need some good Yorkshire air to clear your head and get you less stressed.

It's too late to teach you yoga, pilates or structured relaxation methods, so the alternative is a bracing walk with good views. I would suggest taking a bus to Fountains and Studley Royal. They're really pretty and certainly the type of place I would go if I needed a head clearing exercise.

I know it's a typo but "stoat boots!"

Tickles, I can't spell for toffee, and at the moment, you know I'm facing imminent bereavement. Please cut be some slack!.... Bet they'd be warm though... someones removed my dictionary and thesaurus, so I can't even look up words anymore .

ARRGH! I just came across an evil salesman who was horrible to my daddy.

Daddy isn't home at the moment, therefore I answered phone and polietly told him to go away.

He starts giving us offers and I'm like no thanks etc. and he goes

" Mr ... sounds awfully boring doesn't he"

I was like " That is my dad and what gives you the right to say what is he like? Who the ###### do you think you are" .. and hung up without saying sorry.

Now I'm just annoyed. Very Very annoyed.

You did the right thing now stop being annoyed about it!

salespeople - especially ones like that - deserve to be given no quarter. they are really intrusive.

darn... i am alone at home and really need to practise, but i am always too on-edge when i am alone at home to do so. i have all the lights on and the door to the other half of the house locked (and the key in my pocket), but i can't concentrate. my brain is jumping too much.

We once had some phone company or similar phoning a few times in the same day to ask what we thought of their services. I nearly told them the third time...

Living the 'Scream'


Aaaaarrrrghhhhhhhhhhhh!



AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Thanks, I needed that.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH


I'm doing an exam this term.

So is one of my pupils.

And like a lot of adults taking exams, we're a lot less fussed about WHERE to take the exam than finding a day that works without having to reschedule everyone else we work with to get time off.

So imagine our delight when we hear that a piano teacher near us is setting up a visit, as she always does, and she always gets a Wednesday for her visit 'cos it's her day off - a day that suits both me, my pupil and the accompanist who will play for both of us.

So we get in touch with this piano teacher, get ourselves added to her visit and send the forms off. And in due course the appointment letters come back......

FOR A THURSDAY!!!!! Which is a far more difficult day for all three of us. Especially for my pupil, who has the last slot of the visit, and who will only just be able to get to it with seconds to spare - no time to settle or warm up or anything.

If I had known it wouldn't be a Wednesday, I wouldn't have teamed up with this visit. I would have asked the Board with our entries to try and find us a Wednesday somewhere within a fifty-mile radius or so.....

But now we're stuck.


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH
HHHHHHHH

AAAARRRGGGHHH

WHEN IS LIFE GOING TO GIVE A BREAK!

You lot must be fed up hearing about each little snivvle. It's been absolutely non-stop since that hospital stay in September. I can not actually recall really being me since.

I'M FED UP!!!

This may be of limited use to you, Jo, but how about following some of your own advice? And I mean that in the nicest way possible. Take care of yourself.

I want to. The trouble is I've got to teach today as I can't teach next week. Uncle's funeral. Then the family expect me to look after them.

Whilst I'm here typing and sipping water, not talking and warm its fine. The idea of cooking dinner (next half hour) does not fill me with pleasure.

The idea of picking children up fills me with even less.

At least I've only one half hour piano lesson to teach today and the studio is just down stairs. I can have a hot cup of tea when teaching then rest until I pick up the kids. Then I can hand them over to their dad. Eat dinner, take my anti-biotics and go to bed.

Just as long as eldest child does not want a row with me I'm fine.

AAAAAARGHHHHH!!!!!!!

My English teacher! The most evil creature in the history of the universe (slight exaggeration perhaps)! Anyone who has been here for a while might remember my previous rants on the subject - this time he hasn't done anything specifically to me, but I'm still so ANGRY!!

Background. For those who don't know, in AS level English there is a section of the exam for which our school studies a book called "Wise Children" by Angela Carter (very enjoyable in my opinion). Every year without fail, everyone in the year does badly. This year, I got full marks first time, and a couple of my friends got As too.

Today, after the results of the resits, we were all, including mr evil-english teacher trying to comfort those who did badly. I had helped a couple of friends revise for the resits, who then did better, but nearly everyone did worse (not taking this upon myself - they'd have done better anyway I'm sure). Anyway, in trying to comfort those who didn't do so well, my teacher (let's call him Mr C) was SO offensive.

Two of my friends and I had done well - I'm a total feminist, one of the others is a sort of lukewarm, half feminist, and the other is extremely anti-feminist and half sexist. Despite this, Mr C proclaimed that the exam was biased - only feminists could do well! Another boy in the class said "what, so I got a U just because I'm not a hairy man-hating lesbian?!" and Mr C smiled at him, and nodded. Cue all sorts of remarks of this type which were tolerated. More remarks were tossed around, including "really, people with a decent grasp of English couldn't do well in this... it's only those who don't think very deeply who could get good marks" and "well the truly talented of you all did badly - I don't know what to think!"

There were many many sexist and anti-feminist remarks, as well as general remarks against those who did well... and what really gets to me, aside from the anti-feminism, is the fact that a lot of these people, including a few of my friends, are retaking again. How will they do any better if the teacher all grasp at excuses for their failures?! I know that a few of them, at least, already wrote "from a feminist angle" and to be honest, we're mostly writing what we think of Angela Carter's views - which most certainly were 100% feminist!

Personally, I think the problem is not the fact that people "spoke their mind about feminism" it's the fact that they didn't have a mind to speak. Last week we were told by a different English teacher (we have two, though it seems like Mr C is the only one we ever notice or remember) to go off and analyse a text and everyone said "we can't do that on our own - in Mr C's class he goes through it with us". This is true - in fact often we spend several lessons writing notes on a single poem - and then learning them by heart so we don't have to think and analyse ourselves.

It's ridiculous. I like thinking for myself, I like writing what I think, and I know that if I did parrot everything I'd been told on Angela Carter I would do badly too - because it wouldn't be relevant to the often obscure questions.


I'm so angry!!

Also, feminism isn't man-hating! It's a belief in equality for men and women - thus hating men is anti-feminism, because in that view women are not equal to men, they're above them - that's not equality!

Hope that rant helped, Lucky! I don't think you and Mr C are ever going to see eye to eye, but for your own sake maybe you should let it all run off your feathers. It doesn't seem fair to imply that those of you who did so well didn't think very deeply, but it's so clearly nonsensical that I think you could afford to laugh at it!

i can't believe a teacher could be so unprofessional. how long has he been teaching? because with that sort of conduct and behaviour i couldn't imagine him lasting. i had quite a cruel english teacher for a few years, but she was liked, and respected, because she kept her conduct completely professional and never made inappropriate comments or personal jibes. and it is shocking that such bigotry and discrimination (for example, the comment about "hairy man-hating lesbians") is not dealt with. i don't think that sort of comment is something to laugh off. if comments such as that must be laughed at, then it must be asked whether females anywhere ever truly think they will achieve gender equality.

You're probably right - it's just that he's so well-loved by a lot of people that he says these things, and they take them on board, and don't question them... So now lots of people are going away thinking "in my resit, I'll just write that I love feminism and get an A" and they won't. Other people are going away thinking "man-hating feminists ruined my grade Mr C said it so it must be true", and a lot of people now must think I'm stupid.

Oh well. You're right though I should laugh it off. Now I've had my rant - at least it wasn't at him!

Benson, he's been teaching a very long time - I've heard him say these things a lot... but he's sort of subtle about it... his remarks on "lesbian literature" weren't subtle, but he's built himself up a repuatation as a sort of yoda now, he's the head of department and a lot of people look up to him... they think he's amazing - so he can say what he likes. My other, female, teacher has made similar comments about "mad militant feminists" (they keep saying that word - I don't think it means what they think it means!)

The comment about man-hating hairy lesbians was made by another boy in my class - and Mr C just nodded and agreed though. He didn't actually say it himself, which is something.

I think it might be rather difficult for women to achieve true gender equality now - feminism is a dirty word in my school really (though the text was set, which is something) but I called myself a feminist once, and fielded rumours about me being a lesbian for weeks after.

Annoying for you, Lucky045.

But just think - in a term and a half's time, you'll be out of there and on your way to a far more interesting future at uni and beyond, whereas MrC will still be stuck in his sorry little world.....

i know you said your teacher didn't make that comment, but it is even worse that he chose to do nothing about it. it only takes people to do nothing for evil to triumph.

lucky045, I totally understand what you are going through. Being a feminist myself, i have had many of these experiences and it just goes to show that some people in this world have extraordinarily narrow minds and hope to pass off their own problems onto something which they cannot understand themselves even.

you've got to let it pass like water off a duck's back. I mean, sure, you were right to stand up for what you believe in and i hope this rant helped, but don't think about this too much afterwards!

just remember- it is often hopeless to have hope upon people who are too set in their ways!

Yes you're right, that's what my mum and friends keep telling me. Also that I live in an area that's very rural and a bit stuck in the past, and the attitudes that irritate me aren't that prevalent in "the real world" but I don't know how true that is.




Oh isn't there that famous quote? "All that is necessary for evil to triumph is that good men do nothing"? Though I wouldn't call my English teacher particularly a good man. My French teacher told me the other day that I had to change the questions I'd written for her on the subject of Sarkozy because she wasn't allowed to be subjective - I think that's why my teacher said nothing - he let other people - ie the sexist boy - say what he wanted to himself.




Yep you're probably right - though I always hold out hope that people who are so set in way which I consider to be wrong will listen to my arguments and be persuaded to my point of view. I suppose when they argue back they're probably thinking the same about me!

You can whack some people in the face with a wet fish and they'll still call it a rock if thats what they want to see... I make it about 2 months until you never have to deal with him again I always hated the parrot method of teaching as well, but some people get the impression that everyone is at least as stupid as they are therefore need it.
Good for you to keep trying though, it says a lot of good about you

Have you ever studied the art of argument? From the posts of yours I've seen, you seem to have a pretty good handle on it. It's a useful skill. I don't know if you plan to go to University and what to study, but if you get the option to study Philosophy as a free-elective in the first year, go for it.

It depends. There are two sorts of people in arguments: those who construct arguments, counter arguments, and so on; and those who flail around wildly hoping if they're noisy enough people will agree with them. If you're arguing against the latter, then it isn't so much that they want you to agree with them, it's just that they can't cope with the thought of being wrong themselves .

I don't know what constitutes "the real world", but I don't think things are too bad where I live. Of course, there is still the problem of traditional women's jobs e.g. child care, cleaning being less well paid than tradtional men's jobs, but I don't think attitudes are at all anti-women. Of course, that may just be the circles I move in, but that's how it feels to me.

I'm sure when you get to university you'll meet all sorts of people - some who think as you do, and some who think the exact opposite! But I'm sure you'll have sots of fun debating all kinds of issues, and learning from one another. Any progress yet on which uni to choose?

Haha thanks! I love that analogy. I don't think anyone needs the parrot fashion teaching - it's just that so many people have never learnt to think for themselves that they're certain they can't. Maybe there are some very weak students who need the help - but even then I'm sure they could think things through a little themselves.



Yeah, I've met a few people like that - who keep repeating the same thing over and over again, more and more loudly until you give up? Well, thanks for the compliment, I've never studied the art of arguing, but I always liked debate in English, and we did a bit of philosophy when we had the-best-RE-teacher-in-the-worldtm, and we finished the GCSE syllabus early... She'd studied it at uni I think... it was fun. I'd love to take it some day, I love reading about philosophy, and thinking about it.



Ah, no progress yet, I'm thinking of ringing and trying to change my course at one university - to a joint English and French course... but I'm still not sure which to pick as second and first choices.

You're probably right that most attitudes aren't anti-woman... I think there are still a lot of subconscious prejudices which bother me, as you've mentioned, but mostly it is subconscious, which is why what I encounter at school is so annoying.

I help out in a year 7 class, and even by then they seem to be so determined that they cannot work things out by themselves... Its sad really - their standard response to a question such as 'How do you say 'I' in German?' is along the lines of 'I dunno.' Yes they do know they just can't cope with thinking for themselves!! Its got to the point where I'm ridiculously happy to see a kid actually look something up for themselves rather than saying 'Can't do it' and waiting until someone notices they're doing nothing and helps them... then sit there for another 15 minutes!

No, he got a U for writing extremely poorly... and it would have had to be pretty bad at that to come away with such a grade (or "ungrade" as the case may be!).




Why, was it written in German?!! Isn't an English exam supposed to test your grasp of English? I'd be complaining to the highest authority about this incident. It's just intolerable... make a scene!






If you talk about the fact that you feel you should have equality, then you deny it to yourself. If you feel equal to someone, then you are, and you don't need to do a thing to prove it


.....also, hugs to Jod and hope you feel better too. Insist on being waited on tonight

You used reductio ad absurdum the other day, even if you didn't realise it. You seem like the sort of person who likes to be right (no offence intended, unless I'm also offending myself, see my sig ), and one of the nice effects of actually being able to construct and deconstruct arguments is being able to make yours bulletproof whilst systematically breaking down those of your opponents in a purely (de)constructive manner .

Sorry, I realise that this is a serious discussion and don't want to lower the tone, but...

I help in a first year class (or used to, before this drove me to the brink of despair ) and they were doing a project on endangered species. I was asked by a group of girls, 'Are hedgehogs endangered?' They were being deadly serious. I suppose on a serious note they should have known where to go to find out - they were in a library after all, but it was very hard to take them seriously.

Lucky, I know you haven't got long left with this teacher but you shouldn't have to put up with things like this. I think you've had lots of useful advice though.

wow, you sure are an expert....wouldn't like to be on the opposing side of you!