Andante in C said it, really. Very sorry to hear this Dawn - thinking of you all, and hope your dad is ok xx

^^^ wot they all said.
Thinking of you all.

Gosh Dawn how awful Sending you best wishes

Really sorry to hear this, Dawn

My thoughts are with you, your father and your children as you deal with this. Wishing you the strength you need to get through it all.

This is the one : violence is totally unacceptable : why does he think that showing that temper like he does is in any way acceptable?

I shall be thinking of you, and all those you love, Dawn. Take good care of yourself.

So sorry to read this Dawn. Thinking of you and take care x

Sorry to hear what's happening to you Dawn.

Have just had a moment to catch up on this thread. Very sorry Dawn, to hear about your difficulties. I will be thinking of you and hope that you will manage to find a solution.

I'm sorry that you're going through all this, Dawn. Violence is never good and I'm glad you've decided that it doesn't have to be in your life. You and your kids will cope. Many have coped before you and I'm sure that many will unfortunately have to cope after you. Kids are very resilient - I'm sure they'd much rather have to scrimp and save but not have to worry about whether dad's in a temper when they get home from school. You have all your forum friends to help if you need us. The trail of carnage can be dealt with... it's only stuff and can be replaced. A few broken things may well be worth your future health and sanity. I'm glad you hid your violin away though.

<trytomakedawnsmile> There's a lot to be said for beans on toast Students live on it for years. Alternate with cheese on toast to get some protein.

So sorry to read your sad news, Dawn, and hope you and the kids get on okay. Take good care of yourselves.

So sorry to read this, Dawn

Hop everything works out in the long run though

Thanks everyone for your support...well still hanging in there. Turns out DH came off worse than Dad, he has a black eye...and a fractured ankle! So won't be going anywhere at the moment.

He has said that he has been so frustrated because we are alot more sorted than we used to be, and thinks he CAN be happy with the music so long as we get some us time. We've (including Dad, who is achy, and a bit bruised - he was throwing the punches, DH didnt do much....he just goaded him) agreed that nothing like that can ever happen again. If it does there is no going back.

We are going to try again...but this is the last time. DH doesn't want to leave me or the kids. Just please send us lots of positive vibes to try to find a way through it. Especially the next week when he is off with his ankle....

Oh and my violin is OK....thank goodness I bought the good case, it was thrown HARD on the floor 3 times, upside down and all, and is unscathed...as is the case.

Thanks again to you all x

That is a happy(ier) ending of sorts? Best wishes to you all and hope you manage to work through it as a family.

MMm except just found out my violin has a crack from the soundpost running about 40mm from the top to 40mm from the bottom of the back. Don't know if it is repairable. DH has said he will repair if poss or replace - but he doesn't have the money to buy another now. I daren't play it or tell my Dad at this point. Andy had checked it before but didn't see that or that the bridge had shifted to the left too.

Oh, blast. That is awful.

Oh Dawn have a hug from me . I really really, hope things work out for you.
Through your hard work and dedication you are on the brink of the most amazing opportunities that most of us can never even dream of, and we want to see you fly.
Have another hug for your children and a high 5 for your Dad.

I am thinking of you Dawn, and your violin, and hoping that a miracle working luthier in need of a "just for fun not charging anything" project turns up on your doorstep.



Am actually quite disturbed by own reaction...not until I read andante_in_c's post, and barry-clari's endorsement of it, did I even think of violence as being...um...unusual. Cheers mother

So sorry to hear this Dawn, and about your poor violin too! At least when things come to a head like this they tend to get sorted out, and it sounds like it needed sorting. Your Dad sounds wonderful, and I'm sure everything will turn out well for you all. Thinking of you

Some people find it difficult to dissipate their frustrations - my mother used to keep old plates in the house so that when she was really cross about something she could go outside and fling one at the house wall! I also knew a teacher who kept old spent biros so that if a child became very angry (s)he could be given a few to break in two. I know people who when their boys were younger hung a punchbag in the garage and if the child was angry would suggest 5 minutes hitting that. Violence really isn't unusual, but it needs to be directed at something inanimate, or channelled into physical activity. Violence involving people is totally unacceptable (unless it's controlled, like boxing), but sadly sometimes happens. Look at the statistics on domestic violence, which is found in all strata of society, if you want to see how common it is.

It is always hard for a spouse to feel that they are not being given enough consideration when big changes are going on. It's also hard to have your in-laws constantly around. So while I think Dawn's OH would agree that what he did was totally OTT, I do actually understand something of why he did it, and why he feels he and Dawn need to work on their relationship.

Dawn, all the best in keeping your marriage on track. Your children need their father as well as their mother. I really hope your violin can be made to sound as good as before.

And that is why he is still here. It is hard with Dad here (9 years now). Most of the time not a problem, but sometimes...

And my violin is, we believe, not viable for repair. It would cost more than the final instrument will be worth. DH has said he will replace it, but he can't afford to now and I don't know where I'll find one.

Sending a big Bag-Hug, Dawn.

Your Forum Friends are here in abundance for you.

Bxx

Your Forum Friends are here in abundance for you.

I know, and I really, really appreciate that x

Dawn I do hope you can find a replacement for your violin and everything works out for you, whether that be together or apart.

My aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarggggghh for the day involves my parents. My dad has a serious alcohol problem but I've never seen him as bad as I did today. I think he'll kill himself if he doesn't stop. My mum, is fed up of funding his habit and dealing with him in general!

Have read through the posts : for the violin - I've seen some horrendous looking clarinet cracks that have ended up being repaired...



hope all works out OK...

Wish I had a handy Stradivarius hanging around in my cupboard to lend Dawn!

Best wishes coming to everyone that needs them.

Me too Fact is it either will or it won't, nothing I can really do to change the outcome! That may sound harsh to some but I do believe the only person who can decide to stop is the addict.



Me too

I agree with that, but it doesn't make it any easier to watch

thanks for the strad wishes, everyone...I'd take something much cheaper right now, though. Just re-setup my old one, put the Evah Pirazzi strings on it, in the hope it will improve the sound before my lesson tomorrow.

Because I was curious, and because I know nothing about violins, I did some googling about how to repair cracks in violins. I read that good luthiers have successfully restored some pretty beat up instruments (eg. the guy who fell down the stairs on top of his http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/7244441.stm). Is it an issue of price and time (uneconomical in both cases) or is it that a cracked wooden instrument really cannot be repaired? Sorry if this is a stupid question. Thoughts with you - at the moment I play on a bog standard digital piano but I used to be very attached to my horn and I know how I'd have felt if anything happened to it.

Yes, it's economics; Guivier can mend for around 2k, the instrument WAS worth that, but even with a well repaired crack it will be much less. Not viable, sadly. If the instrument was much more expensive to begin with then yes, it would be repaired.

I see. Really sorry to hear that

Oh, Dawn - what a week! Wish I could think of anything helpful to say. Just

Oh Dawn, I've only just caught up with this thread. I'm so sorry for all your troubles, I so hope you can resolve them (BIG hugs)
x

Just a mini scream - coffee seems to be going up in price everywhere here. 1.10 for an espresso.

Yes, even the beans/powder for the home brew

Again a mini-scream - I had a leaflet through from Danbury Mint advertising their Lesley Anne Ivory Cats Calendar for 2012 - it looks GORGEOUS - BUT it's 19.95!!!!!!!!!!

I really wanted three - which, with P&P, comes to 71.70.

For THREE CALENDARS???

You're 'avin' a larf!

Try Amazon - they have a LAI Cats 2012 calendar for ?7.50! Free P&P

try ebay or Amazon, Cyrilla.

Why should stupid, pointless, destructive habits be so hard to break?

I have locked a classroom door at school and now can't get the key out. Can anyone suggest how to get a stuck key out of a lock without breaking the lock or the key? It's an ordianry interior door lock, not a yale or anything burlar proof. I've got to get it sorted by Monday!!

Lubricate the keyhole with lard or similar.

Spray in some WD40

Agreed

Thanks, ViolaMum and dotted quaver - amazon was the first thing I did and have managed to get a couple of nice ones for a fraction of the price (however, not as nice pictures as the Danbury one).



I'm fed up with my pooter problems .

It's been running slow for a few days now - also e-mail keeps disconnecting and then I get through 20 copies of the same mail...my wonderful pooter guy came and took it away and pronounced nothing wrong with it, so it must be a Virgin problem.

I pay quite a lot of money every month for the technical support thingy - so I activated it tonight and the little online chat window tells me I was connected at 10.31pm and that 'a technician will be with you shortly'. It's now 11.54 AND I'M STILL WAITING. I phoned Virgin and they just said I was in a queue.

I'm giving up and going to bed.

OH has seen this before. Check that you have enough disk space (on all partitions). Last time the email didn't have enough space to download the mail, and so kept trying to download again and again. You might have a big email that is trying to download and fails at the last moment. If Virgin has webmail (customer email gateway) then look on there to see if there is something stuck and delete it. You need your login to be able to do that

If you don't understand any of that then message me and we'll take you through it. Worth a try.

Oops, that could well be me, then...

We're on virgin too, and we've had a bit of a problem at times - it seems unpredictable. We don't have the disk space problem 'cos this is a new computer (other one died ).

Thanks Dawn - it seems to be a bit better this morning (no, Baz, it's not you, yours came through ok!) although not right - but thank you and when I have the mental stamina I'll get on to Virgin again and see if that is the problem - if no luck I'll get back to you!

*phew* I knew mine was a biggie, was just concerned...