Why on earth would a hawk want any shoes?

All birds love shoes Harry. Did your time with Lidd teach you nothing?

...er...that hawks don't look good in red shoes?

But Indian pond herons do and so do red-legged partridges. Hawks wear boots when they are hunting to match their jesses. You really are a townie Harry Parry.

Manages to take three more pairs of red shoes to the post office before May gets up and about. All safely collected and on their way to their new homes now.

evening ladies!
off my workout in a bit, yanking on the bell ropes at the church!
have recieved some shoes in the post!
there disgusting, what person would wear them, garish bright bright red! covered in rubies. Well fake ones!

hi there

Evenin ladies, worked up a sweat tonight at practice!
how are you all?

Hi HC....

Looks like lid, ad and may have gorn out without me again

You know where Add may be Gert. Didn't you see her go out earlier with that huge sack of red shoes???

haha, very true

That's the last of the ebay parcels posted. Lots of satisfied customers now! And May hasn't noticed yet so don't tell her you lot.

By the way, where is May? I haven't seen her since she met that rather young sailor at the beach and took him back for a cup of tea.

Tut tut May. Don't you think that you should settle down a bit now that you are ninety-four dear?

I haven't seen Gert today either. Not since she promised to rustle up some beetroot surprise for supper and I'm quite hungry now.

Perhaps I'll have a boiled egg instead. Chook, chook, chook, come here.

the beetroot surprise is nearly done, its boiling up nicely, i just need to go get a little more water from the rainwater butt outside.

I bet the surprise is that it hasn't got beetroot in it

!

That 'beetroot' is a plum. The fact that it's purple doesn't fool me Gert

Nice plum soup Gert. Want some cheese and biscuits for afters? I have some very blue and mouldy mouse trap special and some Ritz bikkies. Still no sign of May. She must have been taked ill and stayed in bed over the weekend. Let's keep some soup for her for when she gets up.

By the way, your PM box is full up Gert and I had some red shoes to post to you.

...and say that it's made of beetroot and see what she says

Oh dear oh dear oh dear Add. We are out of the running, or should I say dancing. I think it was very mean of the opposition to put baby oil on the floor. Your tango looked like your last tango dear. How are your tendons Add. Stretched beyond where a tendon ought to be??
Oh well, we can concentrate on our musical endeavors now dear
May.

Not so fast May, I say not so fast Old Flower! The producers liked what I did very much and after the show they came to tell me that the judges had decided to let my and whats-his-name go through after all. One of the other dancers slipped on the baby oil after the show and broke a few bones. How sad! Now I am back in and my next dance is a jazz number so I'll be fine with that.

And how may I ask, are your tendons after your wild weekend?

oi addy, cleared some room in my prime minister box for you.

My tendons are fine Adeline dear. always been a bit loose you know

Hello girls! My tendons are in very good shape if I do say so myself.

I bet May has bin aht wiv at least ten Dons in 'er time! Hehehe!


Kettle's on.

Ten Dons, no dahling, never a Don, always a Basil.
Tea would be perfect.
May.

Addy, are you all ready for the final on Saturday??
Fred, Liddy and I will all be there egging you on dear
Anyone else coming on the coach from Anglesea??
May.

'ere listen up may, if got the eggs ready now, the rooster has been laying them, i suspect something is wrong.
ill pack em up now, so theyre nice and ready for the egging.

Gert dearest, we are supporting Add, not egging her, but egging her on. It's an English saying for encouragement

Roosters don't lay eggs Gert, they fertilize them............you know, a bit of How's your father.

By we, you must mean you three. I for one shall be egging her.

Whilst you lot are in the the full latin mood of dancing. I shall recline and watch. Don't think that mean's I don't get a posh frock. I may not me up to dancing at present, but any opportunity to dress up is too good an opportunity to miss.

I shall be in the careful hands of the judges who have promised to look after me.

Now that is summat a girl cannot afford to turn down.

Well done Adeline. You won the title

End of the Neversea Pier Ballroom Champion ( Over 80's section)

Wonderful bit of dancing Add, you were so deft. No one guessed that your partner had died in the first section.
I though Gert was a bit naughty throwing that egg, but when you slipped in the Tango, the judges thought you were so supple

When's the party Add??

May

Yes, i shouldnt have let you slip in that tango, i couldnt help spilling it!

Down to the camel?

Supple indeed! Get stuffed you nasty old baggage Gert! Thanks to you and your eggs and fizzy pop I managed to do a double split at the end, just after my partner died, and broke both hips! Thaks to you I have just had a double hip replacement and will never dance again, at least not for a couple of weeks.
As to a trip to the Camel you can forget that idea too. I can't make those steps anymore. I am just going to sit here and get happily drunk and watch the washing machine for the rest of the day. Pah! And where is Liddy when she's wanted eh? LIDDY? Where's my breakfast?

Stroof an' blimey flippin' 'eck Add! Do stop ya hollerin' in me ear'ole! I'm deaf but I ain't that bloomin' deaf! Well I weren't until ya's opened ya great big mahf!

I bin busy elsewhere dear. I gotta roll arahnd on the floor for the fizzyo people tomorrer, so I've bin doin' me exercises like what she told me ta do. Then I gotta go an' 'ave me 'ear'ole looked at agen. Then I gotta go an' 'ave me 'air chopped orf 'cos it's too fick an' gettin' on me nerves. Then I'm goin' ta meet Patty Noodle an' Harry in Lundun. Nah I got meself a noo friend wot wants me ta go an' bash a toon aht on the pianer wiv 'er. I dunno if I'm comin' or goin' 'alf the time Add I say I dunno if I'm comin' or goin' ducky.

It's too late fer breakfast nah innit? Ya wanna get yaself up a bit earlier swee'eart. I got some cat food an' milk left. I's gonna try an' make some kinda bread puddin' type fingy wiv it. I'll frow a lump of garlic in ta make it taste be'er. Should be alright eh? Fancy some of that do ya?

Kettle's on.

Can't say that I do Lidd. You can have it all. Back to the daytime washing machine.....

Right so it might take two to tango, bu that's two of us out of action due to the bloomin' tango.. Addy has just had a double hip replacement, and I fractured me coccyx.

Dangerous thing this Tango milarkey.

Addy, I think in the future, we'll just have to stick to loking gorgeous in the dresses, but leave the dance floor for the others... see how many other casulaties it causes.

In the meantime, we better just rely on Liddy supplying us with food.

Stroof Add...you is right dahn aren't ya dear? Tell ya what, I'll sing for ya! That's a good idea innit? Cheer ya up in no time that will!

"Knees up muvver Brahn...knees up muvver Brahn.."

'Ello Summat dear!

I can't get me knees Up Lidd, but a Panad and some Welsh Cakes would go down really well just now.

Addy, you have taught her how to make Welsh cakes, or do I have to hobble off to the Aga with m' griddle pan and show her how they are made?

And what's one of these griddle pan things when it's at home Summat? A bakestone is what she needs for proper Welsh cakes.

I'm not at all sure that I can fancy anything that Lidd has made a cake today. I'm feeling quite ill really. I think that my double hip replacement might have gone wrong. I don't think that I am long for this world, I really don't and that's a fact. I think that I will call in my solicitor tomorrow to make out my last will and testiment. Oh dear! I think that my end is nigh. A pity really as I have so much more to offer to the world of music but there it is. The good go first!

Stroof Add! I'm right sorry ta hear of your imminent demise darlin'!!

Can I 'ave ya luvverly grand pianer what was made in Ludwigs time, please ducky? Fanks swee'eart.

Kettle's on.

Well 'urry up an' gerron wi' it Addy, ah'm gettin' raight bored up 'ere on me own! Ah said 'urry up, Ah'm gettin'... oh blinkin' 'eck, ah keep forgettin' she can't 'ear me


Lavvy

Is that you Lavvy old thing. I can hear you loud and clear. That's very odd isn't it?

A panad Lidd? no thank you, not just yet.......I'm feeling a bit...........

Ooh dear...me bestest pal in the weld is breavin' 'er last!! Quick...sign this Add so's I can 'ave ya pianer darlin'.

Ta everso duck.

Not so fast Lidd. I want to see my lawyer to do it all rightly and properly. Anyway I feel better now.

Is that a choir of angels that I hear?............

No it's only me singin' duck. I bin on the malibu agen. *hic*. Not gorn yet then?

I'm still here, just. Perhaps I should call the doctor Lidd?
Give him a call for me old thing.

Errrr...dunno 'is number swee'eart. Bit of a pickle to be in innit?

Look up his number on the front of the phone where it says Doctor's Name you great duffer.

'Ere who ya callin' a great duffer ya great plant pot! You's worse than them people what screech in the hopera! They take for ever ta breave their last an' all.

I can't see no number..stroof where's me specs when I needs 'em?

That's a thought Lidd. I could sing a death aria. Here, borrow my telescope.

Tell him to hurry up Lidd, I'm sinking faster by the minute.