Did somebody mention food?

Them sengwitches look delicious to me! specially the ones wot is shaped a bit like bats

If you like treacle and black pudding sandwiches so much, you eat them

Ingrate!

sue 'as enuff chairs on er hest. *hic* back to the tavern for another puncheon methinks!

You'll be gettin' a right punchin' in a minute....

Oo-er missus! She's off again!

And after me wiping the floor with you in the Tavern in the Town the other evening!

Yes I believe you met me friend Soo in there the other day. We won't 'ave any truck with your nonsense, yer young whipper-snapper.

Who's She - the cat's mother?

'Er probably is....

I go away and look at the state of the food. It's alright Lavvy, I'll soon get you fed up on some Jam roly poly and spotted ####.

Utterly unrelated to the thread, but good to see you posting again jod

If we're into eating keyboard symbols, what about some # cakes with Ps and ^s and served up on a bed of ~ rice?

Norma-Lee Moore-Seine
Grounded Angel

Addy's diaries are full of +++ and ~~~ and ***** not to mention a few %%%%% and ##### too. My word, she led an interesting and somewhat charmed life.

I have settled Dobbin and Eddie down for the night in the spare room and left them to watch newsnight so how about a song or several around the piano ladies?

On second thoughts let's not. Another time perhaps.

I'm sorry but the sensor didn't like the correct diminutive of Richard for a steamed pudding containing mixed fruit. Pity I'd made custard too!

Can they tell the difference between Jeremy Paxman and Jeremy Vine?

Harry you twit, they are PONIES! They don't know the difference of course, but they do enjoy the sounds of human voices in the background and they have a wider view of the world as a result of watching the odd documentary.

Panad anyone?

I thought they might be particularly observant ponies

They have their moments.

Have a panad and a look at some of Addy's diaries Harry. You are mentioned many times.

Remember the rescue from Haddock Lil's place.

*looks at diaries*

Spotted "little Richard" and custard anyone.

Lets Rock and Roll.

Harry I dread to think what Addy's diaries say about that fenland lass Summat Else.

*looks at diaries again*

No...

Crumbs...

Really???

Oh dear....

Lowersinth! I realise what we've been doing wrong! It's not spotted duck at all. Get it out of the custard at once!

Lowersinth: What shall I do with it, Norma? If I just let it go - there'll be custard everywhere.

Here, we'll just sneak the door a open fraction and let it go in Maddie's kitchen. She'll probably think it's just Dagwood being naughty again. There.

*opens kitchen door and releases (custard-covered) duck from custardy*

*runs away*

she ditton say nout!

What does it say about you...

*looks*

ooo

feet smelling like blue cheese?

seems accurate

Why have you been smelling my feet Baz?
(i have an cousin-in-law who gets called Barrance and Barrel for some reason... travel firms in the US dont seem to like the name Barry on its own!)

We have little choice, the aroma is obvious as soon as you enter the room! Lidd was quite right

Maddie sees the mess on her floor.


What has that Dagwood done now? Dear me. Where's the mop and bucket?



There's rather a strong smell in here this evening. Gert dear, is it you?

hmm...the faint aroma of blue cheese...

Gert, I was so pleased I made pudding before you arrived, but your feet! Were you bringing the cheese course?

Panad any one? Panad Ddu for me please.

Love one, thanks! Heavens what a smell!

*opens window*

QUAAAAAACK!

*Dagwood sees opportunity and makes bid for freedom, flapping furiously*
*everyone is showered in custard*

My custard!

Oh well with then hens laying so well, I can soon whip up another batch!

We seem to be having a trifle of difficulty here.


Ah good I see that Maddie still has some Sherry left. New custard, Trifle sponges, an un-lady-like quantity of Sherry. A Raspberry Jelly... good that set quickly thanks to the Ice cubes and some whipped cream. Now lets decorate it with Angelica, Cherries and hundreds and thousands.

A Trifle to go with our trifle of a mess.

*Dagwood arrives at the duck pond*

Dagwood (to the other ducks): Quack, quack, quack, quaaaaaaack, quack
Quackers: quack, quaaaaaaack?
Dagwood: QUACK! QUACK! QUACK!
Other ducks: Quack, quaaaaaaack, quack
All ducks:

You is orf ya head Norm...totally an' utterly quackers!!

You mean you don't understand, Ducky?

Norma-Lee Moore-Seine

I don't understand eider of you!

They've been trifling with me trifle. I told you there was an unladylike amount of sherry soaking the sponges.


Sounds as if you have too. Sounds like there are some newts around that pond too or at least some people who are as enebriated as newts.

For those that weren't paying proper attention....

Dagwood was explaining the trauma he has (again) suffered at the hands of Norma. Quackers thought it was funny (especially the custard bit) and Dagwood got very annoyed. The other ducks then consoled Dagwood and they have a group hug.

Ahhhhh!

I knew that Norm old bean.

Did you like his impression of spotted duck and custard?

He has left quite a few foot prints around. I think that I'll get a maid in a couple of times a week to clear up the mess.


Toad in the hole for supper!

I loved it. Can't think how he came to be covered in custard though...?

*Norma tries to look all innocent*

Norma-Lee Moore-Seine

norma, go shave before you eat, youll get it all stuck round yer mush.

Unfair, Gert! As you well know, that was taken when we were competing in the “Eating a Wire-Haired-Terrier” contest at Crufts!

How come you ate toad in the hole after you demolished a sherry trifle? There was enough Sherry in that trifle to knock out an elephant and it certainly got to you and Liddy, Norma. Gert even ate hers without adding beetroot, or did she add vodka.

Whilst I'm making a Panad Ddu for me does any one want one with some Llefrith in theirs?

Thanks, I'll have some with Llefrith (providing thats not a spelling mistake)

One regular Panad coming up.

Has Dagwood de-custarded his wings?
Or does he need to spend time in rehab as he is going quackers?

Are you reallu sure that you want a panad with buttermilk in it Mole? These dictionary look ups don't tell the full story you know old pal.

Ah well. large panad with buttermilk coming over.

Dagwood is swimming round the pond happily noy with no custard left to show for his experience.


Who is up for Jazz Night at the Camel later? It's to be a lock in!

Mmmmm! Delicious! The buttemilk gives it that je ne sais quack!

[Actually, I made tea last light and accidentally put a small splurge of grapefruit juice in (the carton was the same size and colour as the milk). I though I might as well carry on - as I had already wasted a teabag and a candarel - so I added milk and tasted it. It was absolutely VILE!]

Dagwood will have enjoyed preening himself. It was – of course - BIRD’S custard!

Addy used to have curious tastes so I believe. There is one diary entry of hers that talks of eating chappie butties with the vicar and some revolting mixture called "glop"! Don't ask.

I'll stick to the Panad Ddu in that case that way it's just tea and water and no annoying extras.

Addy helped devise Harrow Mess. Like Eton Mess, but better, just don't let gert get to it.

I believe she was also well known in the Sergeant's Mess, but that's another story...

Was she now!!! I didn't have her down as a military type.