(First of all - I know I've already said more than my fair share on this topic, but I just love to got myself settled in front of the computer for a while in the mornings with my cup of tea! Sure beats a.m. TV!)

The above is so, so, true. Once exam day comes - in fact on the day of the last lesson - I totally ease up on the "pushy teacher" bit. I try to put across the point that the work is done, as far as I'm concerned, and I'm pleased with what's been achieved, regardless of the mark that comes back in the post. Because ANYONE can have an off-day. I always try to be at the exam centre while my pupils are going in a and coming out, and try to create an easy-going atmosphere, giving them the attitude that that they're to ENJOY going in and showing off what they can do, but that if something goes awry, it really doesn't matter very much - because it's a privilege to be there at all, as I wouldn't have allowed them to do the exam if they weren't up to it.

I try to be there, too, to check everything is ok, and help them relax, but above all, to give them chocolate after the exam. This is for the hard work which actually got them there, irrespective of the result .

3 exams in one term?!? and he's 11! well i think i would be more than pleased with 128. at that level. well. grr. but of course theres no point arguing with you all, everyone in here agrees! hmm. well what did happen in the end? or have i missed the conclusion somewhere.. x

This article, from today's Daily Mail, gives food for thought.

Pushy parent syndrome

I've been in almost exactly this situation with my daughter's singing exam last year when even her teacher who had acted as accompanist said that she thought she should have got a distinction (she got 127). We didn't do anything because a high merit is a very good mark and as someone has already said, it will fade into the background when the next grade comes along.

I'm sure the young man will take on board his result and if he's sensible he'll compare how he worked for his "merit" result and for his "distinctions" and perhaps realise that there's an area he could have improved on. It's taken a while, but my daughter now says she knows where she lost out for her singing exam marks. I just hope she applies her knowledge!

But, also, my daughter's violin teacher will not enter pupils for higher grade exams if she knows they are doing another fairly high grade on another instrument in that term and I think that it is a perfectly reasonable approach. I think that I would point out to the mother, who is presumably the problem here, that as one goes up the grades significantly more work is required so it is not a good idea to have too many exams to do in one term. Spread them out a bit - the poor lad must have been seriously stressed, particularly if mother gets agitated about the exams!

Lucietake2, no conclusion yet as (as you may have seen from another thread) there is even more trouble, as this boy's certificate and report sheet have been lost in the post. I have exactly six days to get copies, before I see this family again. What fun we do have.