Help - Search - Members - Calendar
Full Version: Mad Lot!
Forums > ABRSM > Forums Cafe > New Members
Pages: 1, 2
bobifier
QUOTE(katyjay @ Aug 15 2006, 09:32 AM) *

QUOTE(Frederic Chopin @ Aug 15 2006, 09:31 AM) *

QUOTE(katyjay @ Aug 14 2006, 05:43 PM) *
QUOTE(sarah-flute @ Aug 14 2006, 05:36 PM) *
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Fear the ghost!

Ahem.
Oh dear, have we run out of dried frog pills again? Just as well I got some more.
Take one of these and you'll be fine....... ph34r.gif


QUOTE(sarah-flute @ Aug 14 2006, 05:46 PM) *
Thank you katyjay, I'm glad you know about dried frog pills: terrible job getting them out in the wilds of Gloucestershire!
*swallows pills*
Feel better now, thanks wacko.gif



Dried Frog Pills?!? blink.gif



A Terry Pratchett in-joke.

Which book is that???

I thought I'd read all of them...
sarah-flute
Obviously not - the dried frog pills feature in several! The Bursar takes them wink.gif
bobifier
QUOTE(sarah-flute @ Aug 16 2006, 02:07 PM) *

Obviously not - the dried frog pills feature in several! The Bursar takes them wink.gif

Oh yes, I think I do know...
mwl1
QUOTE(bobifier @ Aug 16 2006, 04:32 PM) *
QUOTE(sarah-flute @ Aug 16 2006, 02:07 PM) *

Obviously not - the dried frog pills feature in several! The Bursar takes them wink.gif

Oh yes, I think I do know...


I believe you were lined up as a canditate for taking some!
superpyroman
QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Jul 31 2006, 02:27 PM) *

Hello Crazy Gang!

Was thinking of joining before, but hadn't reckoned on your sense of humours being as warped as mine!! tongue.gif tongue.gif Looking forward to hearing from you biggrin.gif


I challenge you to a warped sense of humour contest!
mwl1
You'd win hands down dry.gif
La_Chopiniste_
QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 08:58 AM) *

You'd win hands down dry.gif

Right...
bobifier
QUOTE(La_Chopiniste_ @ Sep 16 2006, 10:05 AM) *

QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 08:58 AM) *

You'd win hands down dry.gif

Right...

MWL1 is right dry.gif
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 15 2006, 07:43 PM) *

QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Jul 31 2006, 02:27 PM) *

Hello Crazy Gang!

Was thinking of joining before, but hadn't reckoned on your sense of humours being as warped as mine!! tongue.gif tongue.gif Looking forward to hearing from you biggrin.gif


I challenge you to a warped sense of humour contest!


Ok- you're on!! You first! biggrin.gif
superpyroman
we need some rules
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 18 2006, 07:00 PM) *

we need some rules


1. Must have warped sense of humour;
2 Sense of humour to be warped in some way;
3. Sense of humour "different" to everybody elses- i.e "warped";
4. Jokes to cause laughter in a warped kind of way;
5. Nothing personal or warped to be said about each other;
6. Another person with a warped sense of humour to act as referee- nominations welcome;
7. Contest not to be taken too seriously for fear of losing aforementioned warped sense of humour;

biggrin.gif biggrin.gif Will these do? Feel free to add more if needed! biggrin.gif biggrin.gif
superpyroman
they are fine, but we need some method for the competition to take place.
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 19 2006, 08:19 PM) *

they are fine, but we need some method for the competition to take place.


Ok that's your job!
superpyroman
I disagree

Let's have a job deciding contest!
Rosemary7391
Why not just have it take place in this thread (or create a new one) and have the rest of the forum as judges?
superpyroman
but we still don't know how it will work
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 20 2006, 06:04 PM) *

I disagree

Let's have a job deciding contest!


Blimey.........I need to think about this sad.gif

Lets toss a coin- heads I win, tails you lose! smile.gif
maggiemay
QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 21 2006, 09:28 AM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 20 2006, 06:04 PM) *

I disagree

Let's have a job deciding contest!


Blimey.........I need to think about this sad.gif

Lets toss a coin- heads I win, tails you lose! smile.gif

smile.gif
superpyroman
QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 21 2006, 09:28 AM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 20 2006, 06:04 PM) *

I disagree

Let's have a job deciding contest!


Blimey.........I need to think about this sad.gif

Lets toss a coin- heads I win, tails you lose! smile.gif


that seems a bit unfair... to make it fair, if it lands on it's side I lose as well
Car Expert
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 23 2006, 03:54 PM) *
QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 21 2006, 09:28 AM) *
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 20 2006, 06:04 PM) *
I disagree

Let's have a job deciding contest!
Blimey.........I need to think about this sad.gif

Lets toss a coin- heads I win, tails you lose! smile.gif
that seems a bit unfair... to make it fair, if it lands on it's side I lose as well
QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 09:46 AM) *
You'd win hands down dry.gif
wink.gif

Car Expert
bobifier
QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 21 2006, 09:40 AM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 20 2006, 06:04 PM) *

I disagree

Let's have a job deciding contest!


Blimey.........I need to think about this sad.gif

Lets toss a coin- heads I win, tails you lose! smile.gif

What if it's a coin with three sides?
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(bobifier @ Sep 25 2006, 03:33 PM) *

QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 21 2006, 09:40 AM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 20 2006, 06:04 PM) *

I disagree

Let's have a job deciding contest!


Blimey.........I need to think about this sad.gif

Lets toss a coin- heads I win, tails you lose! smile.gif

What if it's a coin with three sides?

Errrrr... can't recall ever seeing a coin with three sides. huh.gif
superpyroman
QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 09:58 AM) *

You'd win hands down dry.gif


Hey! I didn't win!
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 25 2006, 04:01 PM) *

QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 09:58 AM) *

You'd win hands down dry.gif


Hey! I didn't win!


That's because you didn't contribute anything!!!!!!! biggrin.gif biggrin.gif
bobifier
QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 25 2006, 04:28 PM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 25 2006, 04:01 PM) *

QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 09:58 AM) *

You'd win hands down dry.gif


Hey! I didn't win!


That's because you didn't contribute anything!!!!!!! biggrin.gif biggrin.gif

I say it's because he lost!
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(bobifier @ Sep 25 2006, 04:50 PM) *

QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 25 2006, 04:28 PM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 25 2006, 04:01 PM) *

QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 09:58 AM) *

You'd win hands down dry.gif


Hey! I didn't win!


That's because you didn't contribute anything!!!!!!! biggrin.gif biggrin.gif

I say it's because he lost!


Yes exactly blink.gif biggrin.gif biggrin.gif
superpyroman
QUOTE(Charlies Aunt @ Sep 25 2006, 04:28 PM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 25 2006, 04:01 PM) *

QUOTE(mwl1 @ Sep 16 2006, 09:58 AM) *

You'd win hands down dry.gif


Hey! I didn't win!


That's because you didn't contribute anything!!!!!!! biggrin.gif biggrin.gif


makes snse
Car Expert
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Sep 28 2006, 08:48 PM) *
makes snse
That doesn't make sense wink.gif

Car Expert
superpyroman
does it make snse though?
Car Expert
As usual, I am confused as to what Mr PyroMan has said...unsure.gif wink.gif

Car Expert
superpyroman
and I am confused as to what pi is to 40,000 decimal places
bobifier
QUOTE(Car Expert @ Sep 28 2006, 08:54 PM) *

As usual, I am confused as to what Mr PyroMan has said...unsure.gif wink.gif

Car Expert

I have to live with him...
mwl1
He's a very silly boy. I have to interact with him daily...
superpyroman
QUOTE(mwl1 @ Oct 3 2006, 05:50 PM) *

He's a very silly boy. I have to interact with him daily...


you don't have to
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Oct 3 2006, 06:01 PM) *

QUOTE(mwl1 @ Oct 3 2006, 05:50 PM) *

He's a very silly boy. I have to interact with him daily...


you don't have to


I tried to interact with him in our Warped Sense of Humour thingy. I wouldn't mind, but it wasn't my idea in the first place!! blink.gif sad.gif smile.gif
chocolate girl
Welcome
Piano gurl
car expert,
i was just reading this and have come to a revalation:
I DON'T HAVE A JOB IN THE CAFE!
i am very deprived
so....

please could I have one?
i will work very hard indeed. promise. laugh.gif
Car Expert
Here's the cafe job list. You can choose an existing job from the list, or make your own one up smile.gif.
QUOTE(secondary subsitutional manager OR The Very Busy Man @ Jul 24 1684, 28:30 JM)


~ABRSM Platinum Blend Café©~

Have a r_e_s_t in our |bar|



Employees Hired:


Management
  • 1 Manager: Wobby
  • 1 Substitutional Manager: Purple Dolphin
  • 1 Second Substiutional Manager: Car Expert
  • 1 Recruitment Officer: Car Expert
  • 2 Administrators: Bob [Car Expert's Penguin] + Lady Bobbington [Bob's wife]


Economy & Health
  • 1 Advertiser: Rainbow
  • 1 Advertiser Assistant: Choddy
  • 1 Chiropedist: Crazy Cow
  • 1 CPR/First Aid Specialist: Kayladavies
  • 1 Official Orthodontist: Talitha
  • 1 Plastic Surgeon: Teabag
  • 1 Reflexologist: Noodle
  • 1 Resident Doctor: Daisy
  • 1 Resident First Aider: SuzyMac
  • 1 Stripper: Musicbox
  • 1 Therapeutical Hugger: Crazy Cow
  • 2 Accountants: Boo Radley + Purple Dolphin
  • 2 Manicurists: Crazy Cow + MattD
  • 4 Hairdressers: Chocolate Girl, Crazy Cow, Crazy_Purple_Piano_Freak + Princesa Siempre Vendre


Food & Drink
Food
  • 1 Resident Bowl Of Green Jello: Willow129
  • 2 Delicatessen Servers: FluteAndBassoon and Violin-Ann
  • 1 Official Cake Maker: Crazy_Purple_Piano_Freak
  • 1 Cheese Supervisor: Superpyroman
  • 1 Head Chef: Amber
  • 1 Apprentice Head Chef: Deborah
  • 11 Chefs: AlyssaBullockSingh, Belle, Car Expert, CrazyDudette22, Crazy_Purple_Piano_Freak, Musicbaby, Princesa Siempre

    Vende, Purple Dolphin, S8535049, Trebor + Uberzoldat
  • 1 Cutlery Sorter: Hazel
  • 1 Official Cucumber Checket: Charlies Aunt
  • 1 Official Lemon Mousse Taster: PetraT
  • 1 Resident Cake & Cookie Maker: SaxFan
Drink
  • 1 Bartender: Hulk
  • 1 Bartender Assistant: Purple Dolphin
  • 1 Coffee Bar Specialist: Violin-Ann
  • 1 Hot Chocolate Frother: LucieTake2
  • 1 Resident Sherry Expert: Cyrilla
  • 1 Resident Tea Drinker: Clarissa
  • 1 Resident Toast Maker: SuperPyroMan
  • 1 Wine Waiter: Patricia
Food + Drink
  • 1 Waitress On Rollerskates: SmileyGirl
  • 6 Wai[ters/resses]: Bb Clarinet, Crazy Cow, Puff Cat, Scotty_Doesnt_Know, Symphony + Uberzoldat


Entertainment
  • 2 Assistant Organists: Mwl1 + Organist_Katy
  • 1 Band Manager: Freakish-Delight
  • 3 Band Guitarists: Car Expert, Freakish-Delight + The Oboemeister
  • 1 Band Keyboardist: IrisH - LoonY
  • 1 Band Singer: Hellokitty
  • 1 Cabaret Singer: Jazzywench
  • 1 Café Mascot: Firebird
  • 1 Clown (Balloon Instruments): Ben_Walker446
  • 1 Composer-In-Residence: Flautino
  • 1 Cupboard Monster: Bobifier
  • 1 Drummer: Manek
  • 1 Forum Duck Decoy: Oboebunny
  • 1 Jools Holland's Impersonator: Shelton
  • 1 Karoke Corner Manager: Frederic Chopin
  • 1 Krazy Klown; Crazy_Purple_Piano_Freak
  • 1 Melodica Back-up Pianist: Ashmoors
  • 1 Piano Tuner: Mwl1
  • 1 Pot Noodle Hornplayer: Jonscott14
  • 1 Resident Alto Choir Singer: Belle
  • 1 Resident Baroque Specialist: IrisH - LoonY
  • 1 Resident Cellist: Piello
  • 1 Resident Flautist: PianoAndFlute
  • 1 Resident Oboist: Schwournes
  • 1 Resident Organist: MrBouffant
  • 1 Resident Piano Tuner: Piano*Oboe*Milly
  • 1 Resident Recorder Player: 2nd ben3
  • 1 Resident Viola Player: Choddy
  • 1 Resident Violinist: Mwl1
  • 2 Conductors: mrbouffant + violin-ann
  • 2 Resident Recorder Maestros: IrisH - LoonY + Recorderzrule
  • 3 Resident Pianists: Carol*Piano, La_Chopiniste_ & Piello
  • 17 Musicians: AnotherPianist, Bb Clarinet, Cecilia, FluteAndBassoon, IrisH - LoonY, Keys, Melody_Maker,

    Nocturne_In_Silver, Neil.Clarinet, Oddball, PianoEmma, Rainbow, S8535049, Sarah-Flute, Saxophonist, Scotty_Doesnt_Know +

    YetAnotherPianist
  • 1 Head Of Entertainment: Noodle
  • 5 Entertainers: Archie [Janexxx's Dog], Janexxx, Keys, Oddball + Saxophonist


Customer & Hygiene
  • 1 Campsite Manager: Devil_Fiddler
  • 1 Chauffeur: Boo Radley
  • 1 Door Opener: Rosie_Piano_Cello
  • 1 Gardener: Bobifier
  • 1 Grammar Checker: Hellokitty
  • 1 Handy Man: Mwl1
  • 1 HP Quoter: Crazy_Purple_Piano_Freak
  • 1 Hydrogen Farmer: Superpyroman
  • 1 Keeper Of The Welsh Dragon: PetraT
  • 1 Librarian: Piano*Oboe*Milly
  • 1 Librarian (Music): Lillylemon
  • 1 Locksmith: BassMadMatt
  • 1 Mad Scientist: Flautino
  • 1 Mediator: JoD
  • 1 Official Guest: July
  • 1 Professional Student: Iridium77
  • 1 Resident Babysitter: Belle
  • 1 Resident IT Technician: Mwl1
  • 1 Resident Scouser: IrisH - LoonY
  • 1 Resident Unicyclist: Bobifier
  • 1 Valet Parking Guy: Car Expert
  • 1 Vicar: Noodelz
  • 1 Vicar Reserve: Car Expert
  • 1 Vice President: Choddy
  • 1 Walking Dictionary: Car Expert
  • 1 Weather Girl: Crazy_Purple_Piano_Freak
  • 1 Wellington Keeper: Keith The 'Wannabe Organist'
  • 1 Head Of Cleaning Staff: Andante_In_C
  • 5 Cleaners: cheeble, Choddy, Nannyjay, Simba [Scotty_Doesnt_Know's dog] + Weejen
  • 4 Bouncers: Chaos_91, MASSY, Musicbox + Noodelz
  • 4 Interpretors: Bb Clarinet, Hulk, July (for German-speaking countries) + Scotty_Doesnt_Know
  • 5 Professional/Fake Diners: MaggieMay, Nicki_Flute, Nocturne_In_Silver, Rainbow (Vegetarian) + Tinkleing_The_Ivories
  • 5 Security Guards: Hulk, Noodelz, Noodle, Saxophonist + Uberzoldat


Media & Self-Improvement
  • 1 Agony Aunt: JoD
  • 1 Banana Specialist: Bobifier
  • 1 Banker: Bobifier
  • 1 Broadband Guy: Noodelz
  • 1 Chief Computer Tinkerer: Pinkoi
  • 1 Finance Manager: Saxmaniac
  • 1 Fortune Teller: CrazyDudette22
  • 1 Health & Safety Inspector Socialiser: Sax_Girl
  • 1 Inventor: Rosemary7391
  • 1 Lawyer: Trellis
  • 1 Military Advisor: Noodelz
  • 1 Random Fact Specialist: Mushroom
  • 1 Resident Accent Coach: Mr Fredd
  • 1 Resident Alfa Romeo Expert: Nicia-Clarinet-Flute
  • 1 Restaurant Critic: Sbhoa
  • 1 Spokesman: Noodelz
  • 1 Theory Teacher: Nocturne_In_Silver
  • 1 Vet: SteveHopwood
  • 2 Dancing Instructors: Musicbox + Nocturne_In_Silver


Sport
  • 1 Resident Tennis Mad Girl: Rosemary14
  • 1 Resident Halifax Town Supporter: LucieTake2
  • 1 Resident Leicester City Supporter: Nicki_Flute
  • 1 Resident Plymouth Argyle Supporter: Boo Radley
  • 1 Resident Reading Supporter: Car Expert
  • 1 Resident Scarborough Supporter: Rainbow
  • 1 Resident Southport Supporter: Choddy
  • 1 Resident Westbury United Supporter: Oddball
  • 1 Resident West Ham United Supporter (Part-Time): Noodelz
  • 2 Resident Arsenal Supporters: Andante_In_C + Noodelz
  • 2 Resident Charlton Athletic Supporters: Barry-Clari + The Oboemeister
  • 2 Resident Liverpool Supporters: IrisH - LoonY + MrBouffant


Other
  • 2 Turtle-Doves: Crazy_Purple_Piano_Freak + Flautino
  • 1 Partri-idge In A Pear Tree: Katyjay
TOTAL EMPLOYEES = 117
TOTAL JOBS = 212


Salary
• 1st-10th day of employment, "Matriculated" - Salary: 5?/hour
• 11th-30th day of empoyment, "Fresher" - Salary: 10?/hour
• 31st-70th day of employment, "Executive Assistant" - Salary: 20?/hour
• 71st-150th day of employment, "Field Sales Representative" - Salary: 40?/hour
• 150th-310th day of employment, "Junior Executive" - Salary: 80?/hour
• 311th-1230th day of employment, "Executive" - Salary: 160?/hour
• 1231st-2470th day of employment, "Senior Manager" - Salary: 320?/hour
• 2471st-4950th day of employment, "Vice President" - Salary: 640?/hour
• 4952st-9910th day of employment, "President" - Salary: 1280?/hour
• 9911th+ day of employment, "CEO's Apprentice" - Salary:2560?/hour

Wages are paid directly to one's account in ?. ABRSM (Sheqel Musicale) only.
• The current market exchange rate: 1?. ABRSM=£0.004
• Not interchangeable with Israeli Sheqel.

Company policy
• £. GBP is preferable, but ?. ABRSM is also accepted.
• Bonuses are given in the form of shares.
• Complaints may be sent to "TheABRSMPlatinumBlendCafé.complaints@abrsm.org". Your statutory rights shall be affected.
• Dividends are distributed equally among the current amount of shares.
• For every time that the %shares exceeds 100, 2000 more shares are floated.
• Purchases and services are not refundable.
• The current CEO automatically receives 90% of all SHARES, regardless of whether further shares are floated.
• Neither the CEO nor the "ABRSM Platinum Blend Café" company is responsible for any physical, psychological or spiritual

damage caused to any one person from usage of any "ABRSM Platinum Blend Café" products or entry to the "ABRSM Platinum Blend

Café" headquarters itself or any other branch of global franchises.

Copyright
• "ABRSM Platinum Blend Café©" is a registered trademark of "Wobby" and "Associated Boards of the Royal Schools of Music".
• Copyright ©2006 "Wobby" and "Associated Boards of the Royal Schools of Music".
• "ABRSM Platinum Blend Café©" properties are trademarks of "Wobby" and "Associated Boards of the Royal Schools of Music".
• All rights reserved.


Car Expert
*
euph1
Can I be the resident expert on every type of coffee in the world??????????????

(I will require around £60 a week to purchase coffee, but will accept a different salary if it is needed)
Car Expert
QUOTE(euph1 @ Oct 23 2006, 08:33 PM) *
Can I be the resident expert on every type of coffee in the world??????????????
Yep, sure smile.gif.
QUOTE(euph1 @ Oct 23 2006, 08:33 PM) *
(I will require around £60 a week to purchase coffee, but will accept a different salary if it is needed)
The cafe currency is ABRSM Sheqel Musicale (₪). You can convert that into pounds at the ABRSM bank, which can be found by turning right onto ABRSM Road when exiting the cafe.

Car Expert
superpyroman
it's been burned down twice now!
Car Expert
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Oct 26 2006, 10:27 PM) *
it's been burned down twice now!
I think you may be thinking of the Viva Percussion shop wink.gif

Car Expert
Noodelz
QUOTE(Car Expert @ Oct 26 2006, 10:28 PM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Oct 26 2006, 10:27 PM) *
it's been burned down twice now!
I think you may be thinking of the Viva Percussion shop wink.gif

Car Expert

laugh.gif

I know this is old now but a coin does technically have three sides. I think.
superpyroman
QUOTE(Noodelz @ Oct 27 2006, 05:15 PM) *

QUOTE(Car Expert @ Oct 26 2006, 10:28 PM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Oct 26 2006, 10:27 PM) *
it's been burned down twice now!
I think you may be thinking of the Viva Percussion shop wink.gif

Car Expert

laugh.gif

I know this is old now but a coin does technically have three sides. I think.


that's right....

actually it technically has more sides than that
bobifier
QUOTE(superpyroman @ Oct 28 2006, 07:32 PM) *

QUOTE(Noodelz @ Oct 27 2006, 05:15 PM) *

QUOTE(Car Expert @ Oct 26 2006, 10:28 PM) *

QUOTE(superpyroman @ Oct 26 2006, 10:27 PM) *
it's been burned down twice now!
I think you may be thinking of the Viva Percussion shop wink.gif

Car Expert

laugh.gif

I know this is old now but a coin does technically have three sides. I think.


that's right....

actually it technically has more sides than that

So, when you say 'That's right....'....?
superpyroman
well it has three sides and then some more
bobifier
This is the longest newbie thread!
Charlies Aunt
QUOTE(bobifier @ Nov 4 2006, 10:06 PM) *

This is the longest newbie thread!


Hurrah!!! smile.gif smile.gif
chocolate girl
welcome to forums!
This is a "lo-fi" version of our main content. To view the full version with more information, formatting and images, please click here.