Yeasterday I did this concert and I can safely say it was the worst I have ever played in my life....

I had to play flute which I didnt want to do anyway but I just got sooo nervous and totally messed it up.... I forgot to count , missed out massive bits and didnt get the high notes... This doesn't happen with any other instruments or singing and I just thought should I just give up flute... If I can't play flute properly then whats the point? But I don't know if I would regret it later on especially as I am the furtherst on flute than all my other music things.... Just wondered if anyone else ever felt like this? Do you think that it's worth me carrying on if I can't play flute infront of other people?

xx LeaSalonga xx

I bet we all have had a time like this when we've seriously considered whether it's worth carrying on with a particular instrument.

I think you should give yourself at least a few days to get over this concert. Then I would say - if you enjoy playing the flute, don't give it up. You can still enjoy playing it for yourself, even if you never play it in public again.

It's funny you should post tonight, as I was thinking of you earlier! I watched my old 'Making of Miss Saigon' video, starring your namesake

lol! My all time favorite musical! Maybe I'll buy the video to cheer me up... hehe...



edit..... I just was looking at the times we posted and both are at 11:18....lol

No, don't give up!

I felt like I wanted to give up once but didn't and I'm so glad I didn't now. One of my cousins gave up an instrument when she was younger and really regrets it!

Remeber that the flute is a verytemperamental instrument (thats why it suits me!) and if you are nervous things like tone and top notes go haywire! It happens to me in all my music exams!

We all have exams and concerts that go badly wrong, but you get over them and move on, by all means focus on your other instruments and singing more if you dislike the flute that much, but don't drop it suddenly simply because you wnat to forget all about the concert, it doesn't help particularly, because you just feel guiltier afterwards.

Having been there with your experience, (and worse) I understand what its like, but I'm very glad I never gave up. I'd never have forgiven myself if I had.

dont give it up cos you probably will regret it later. i think its safe to say that most people have had times when they messed up so bad that they felt like giving up but that certainly doesnt mean that u should!! things happen but thats life!! LOL

Never give up, if you enjoy playing then that's all that matters, gettihng it right and entertaining other people is a bonus. Don't feel like you have to play to please other people, play for yourself. That way you'll enjoy it more and probably gain confidence and improve as a result. I'm sure even pavarotti has his bad days (don't quote me on that!)
Keep going!

Don't give up! I play the flute and sometimes I just play rubbish because I am nervous or whatever. I would get a new teacher, and focus on your good points. I always dreaded concerts but for the first time in 7 years a few months ago I actually enjoyed playing. There are also so many flute activites you can join in, check out these sites: www.flutewise.com, www.bfs.org.uk. Buy some flute recordings, get some inspiration - thigns will improve, you will love it when you do a concert and it goes perfectly. I am Grade 7ish standard so if you wanna talk about it then just email me or send me a private message and I will be happy to reply

QUOTE (nicki_flute @ Jun 27 2004, 07:57 PM)

I would get a new teacher,

why is it the teacher's fault she had a bad time?

I'd quote the ole saying - if you fall off a horse, get right back on. And the reason: if you leave things too long before you attempt a similar experience, the little molehill becomes a mountain. In other words, you build it up in your mind to be something it probably wasn't. Everyone makes mistakes. Most people 'suffer' from nerves.

When faced with a challenge, we have two choices: fight or flee. If you flee (give up flute) you're the one who misses out, and what's likely is that you'll end up feeling like a quitter/bad about yourself.

Fight!!! Choose a piece you know you play really well. Organise to play it in front of your family. In three weeks, organise to play it in front of your extended family and some friends.

Expose yourself to nervous situations. If you know the neighbours are home, go outside and play so they can hear you. (This usually makes most people nervous!!) Tape yourself if you've never done it before, because this can also make you a little nervous. Why am I suggesting this? So that you can slowly build confidence in yourself that yes! you can play DESPITE having nerves.

Another thing to work on is your attitude. You said you 'didn't want to do' it. But if you agreed, then you have to make yourself be positive. If you walk on stage thinking, "I really don't want to be here, I wish I wasn't here, why did I agree to do this?" you're hardly going to give an outstanding performance. Think of all those sports people who pump themselves up before a game. They do this because they know just how important attitude is. Music is no different.

Don't blame the teacher . Nerves are something you can work on. In the big scheme of things, one lousey performance means nothing. Keep fluting and striving forward!!

I'd stick with the flute, I have very off days now and again, I find the weather doesn't help wit me, I practice in my room sometimes and it gets quite hot and its very hard to get a nice tone and the high notes when it's like that. Even when it's not hot I think we all have off days, the flute is a lovely instrument, but just cos you have a bad few days don't get put off, keep going, even if you are just playing for your own pleasure. Play along with cds like I do.

Hope you keep it up, I almost gave up piano once, at grade5 level and i'm so glad I didn't, as it's my life now.

Joy

Minsmusic: I thought she should get a new teacher as it might make her more mtivated or confident...only a thought Or work with the teacher she has.

QUOTE (Jade @ Jun 27 2004, 11:25 AM)

I felt like I wanted to give up once but didn't and I'm so glad I didn't now. One of my cousins gave up an instrument when she was younger and really regrets it!

So, whats stopping her from picking it up again?

QUOTE

If you flee (give up flute) you're the one who misses out, and what's likely is that you'll end up feeling like a quitter/bad about yourself.

Excellent point well put !!

Don't give up. Make that bad experience into a turning point for you and your confidence. Then you 'll be able to look back on it as something that had a positive result.

Has anyone said "yes - give up" ?? I don't think so !!

Good luck

Maggie

Dear Minsmusic,

Absolutely wonderful, your post is fantastic advice.

Dear Leasalonga,

You are allowed to make mistakes, even infront of a live audience. Where would the fun be in being perfect all the time?! I think you should continuing playing the Flute.

Whenever I play an instrument I like to think its a way of expressing my feelings to others. If i am angry i will played it loud and perhaps with a few mistakes, if i am relaxed I can express myself and enjoy it more. Just a thought? Sometimes its hard to relax before a concert especially when you have Brother's, Sisters, Parents, Children being loud around you.

Keep playing and keep smiling!

Craig

QUOTE (anamaria @ Jun 30 2004, 09:30 PM)

Why is everybody deluding this person, giving her the impression that she's a remotely competent flautist?

Oh dear. This is a really damaging thing to say.

QUOTE (leasalonga @ Jun 26 2004, 10:11 PM)

Yeasterday I did this concert and I can safely say it was the worst I have ever played in my life.... I had to play flute which I didnt want to do anyway but I just got sooo nervous and totally messed it up.... I forgot to count , missed out massive bits and didnt get the high notes... This doesn't happen with any other instruments or singing and I just thought should I just give up flute... If I can't play flute properly then whats the point? But I don't know if I would regret it later on especially as I am the furtherst on flute than all my other music things.... Just wondered if anyone else ever felt like this? Do you think that it's worth me carrying on if I can't play flute infront of other people? xx LeaSalonga xx

Give up if you really and truly don't like playing the flute. But is this what you don't like, or is it all the useless parerphanalia that gets in the way, like counting and putting on an act and obeying someone else's whim or the general bullying and browbeating that have become part of the process....

All the great musicians of any period in any type of music have learned by imitation, not by struggling with grades and somebody else's idea of what makes a cute event or 'concert'. Most classical music is taught as though the individual creative exploration/expression/sharing of deep feelings and experiences of life, beauty etc. were either nothing to do with it, or the job of the teacher to 'put in' artificially....

Have you tried just picking out tunes you know? Or you can buy sheetmusic (for any instrument - or for e.g. violin or tin whistle - same notes. You can sometimes get combined book/CD) with traditional English, Irish,'Klezmer' or Bulgarian etc. folkdances. The point is that they are short, sometimes not as difficult as they sound, and thrilling, exciting and stirring as REAL music, even without accompaniment (though much better still with, of course. What sounds really good is 2 or more players playing the same tune each in their own way at the same time...)

Hey guys!

Thanks for all of your replys... they really were encouraging... I'm going to take your advice (well most of it!! hehe) and carry on with the flute... I had my flute lesson yeasterday and realised how much I enjoy it even if I never play to an audience again... I hope that I do get enough confidence in my flute playing to be able to play on my own again. I really probably would regret it if I gave up flute as I did with ballet so I'm going to keep going for now...

thanks a lot for your replies

xx LeaSalonga xx