Hi everyone,

I really need some advice!!! I haven't been well recently and for the first time ever, I'm unmotivated regarding my oboe. I think I cracked a rib during a coughing fit (which is relatively easy for me to do with the condition I have, I've done it before quite a few times) and playing the oboe just simply hurts at the moment This is putting me off practising, and then I panic because I think my teacher will be annoyed with me for not working hard enough, and I feel really stressed and under pressure.

I had to miss my last two lessons due to having to work late and then being ill, so I haven't had a lesson for four weeks and my next lesson is tomorrow evening and I am really worried about it. I can't afford it miss any more lessons really, I pay for them in advance and they aren't cheap, and money is getting tight again because I am having to pay to see a private osteopath and massage therapist every week too.

I feel absolutely rubbish. I'm supposed to be playing the oboe purely because I enjoy it!! I've been having a lovely time playing the cello and viola and recorders instead, and even though the viola hurts my shoulders, it's nowhere near the pain I'm in when I try to play the oboe.

I'm worried that if I continue stressing like this I will burn out and just want to drop the oboe completely, and I can't believe I've reached a point where I can even feel that that is possible! I used to not be able to put it down!

Oh dear

Sorry for the whinge

Toni xx

Aww, hugs (but gentle ones, not wanting to cause any more damage).

I think we all have phases when we're not as motivated as we feel we should be; certainly there are times when I really can't stand the pieces that I'm working on, so don't get hung up on just wanting to sit in your pyjamas and watch junk television.

Speak to your oboe teacher before your next lesson and explain the situation. I try to be sympathetic towards my pupils if I know they've been unwell or have had loads of work to do. He/she may have just the cure for putting the fun back into playing, which is what it's supposed to be about, after all - one of mine loves playing duets, so I'll throw in a duet or two at the end of the lesson if I've been working her hard (so that's duets every lesson! ).

Oh dear - I am sorry for you - and I know that feeling too.

I was too ill last year to contine with lessons - not with the instrument but unable to practice and also with the stress of having to have practiced so as not to waste the teacher's time. I actually stopped lessons for a few months and then went back to study and not play. I think this was time really well spent and after returning to lessons proper for a while I decided to stop them officially and study composition instead (with the same teacher).

With me the stress of having to have practiced was just another thing I didn't need - but I really enjoyed my lessons. I know keyboard is a different sort of thing but is there an equivalent way in which you might continue having lessons but not play for a while? Also I guess you have the problem of losing ground physically through not practicing on a wind instrument.

Poor Oboebunny. I'm sorry that you've been ill and that playing hurts. It's wretched when you can't make music as you want to - and I understand how it feels after losing my voice for a month earlier this year.

I agree 100% that you should explain the situation to your teacher. And I'd go one step further - take a break from playing the oboe. Playing shouldn't ever hurt, and if it does, you need to take time out to recover.

Either play an instrument that doesn't hurt (after all, that's still developing your musicality, isn't it) or do some "silent practice". This consists of doing things like listening to recordings of the works you're doing, and mentally playing along, or studying the score and imaginging playing it, or holding the oboe and doing the fingerings but not blowing. Alternatively, use the time to do some "programme notes" type research on the pieces - find out more about the composers, see if you can discover when/why they were written etc.

All of these will help you towards when your ribs heal and you feel ready to play again.

And do take care of yourself.


katyjay

You're ill, it hurts when you play, and you worry about what your teacher will say???

I agree 100% with Katy. Don't even look at the oboe until your ribs/lungs are back to normal. You could even be making it worse by playing.

Steve

Hope you feel better soon xx

Don't be so hard on yourself. If something's painful then you're bound not to want to do it and you don't need to add extra pressure on yourself by worrying what your teacher's going to say. Anyway, that's the first thing you should tell your teacher when you see him/her. They'll understand you're not making excuses if you're usually a diligent student.

I know how you feel as I went through a 3 month phase this summer where I was just plodding through my guitar practise as my son was ill in hospital and I was nauseous and totally exhausted (1st 3 months of pregnancy). I felt guilty for not practising more and couldn't quite believe that all my enthusiasm had evaporated. It passed when I felt physically better and my son recovered.

Hang on in there. Tell your teacher, let yourself recover with reduced or no practise, do what Katjay suggests regarding alternative methods of practise and soon you'll be a bouncing Oboebunny again.

Good luck.

G

Hi Oboebunny

If you've cracked a rib and you've told your teacher so, I am very surprised they are encouraging you still to play. I would insist a pupil of mine took a break until they could play with preferably no pain or, at most, minimal pain. Of course you're fed up and don't like your oboe - it hurts to play it, why should you like it?!

Come clean with your teacher (if you haven't already) and say it's too much for you at present. Just be kind to you - when you start feeling better you can start to play again. You'll be a bit rusty initially but that will pass and you'll soon be back to loving it again I'm sure.

That said, remember, we all go through phases of loving/disliking instruments we play and playing well/playing not so well. It's part of the process of learning. When you are otherwise fit, you have to plough through the negative times and then, one day, the sun shines again and off you go on your merry way. The dark days are a bit gloomy but we all have them and keeping going through them is key to success.

However, first you must be fit. So concentrate on that now - the oboe is hugely demanding to play and fit is what you need to be.

Hope you're soon feeling better and itching to go on the oboe again.

Take care
Oboist

Hi everyone, thank you so much for your replies and support. You're all brilliant.

I haven't told my teacher yet - I feel sort of embarrassed that yet again my health is getting in the way of me being able to play. It happens so often that I worry that people think I'm making excuses, so I end up not saying anything until it's too late It's depressing, because I don't physically look ill, and I can be in a lot of pain one day and fine the next.

My teacher is lovely though, I'm sure she wouldn't want me to force myself to play. I'll ask if we can look at theory or reedmaking or something this evening instead.

Since I can't play the oboe much I've been playing my viola a lot, but I've got to be careful that I don't overdo it and hurt my shoulders again. I'm finding that the viola is actually more comfortable than the violin though, because it's bigger and I am less "crunched up" around it. I've been learning the alto clef, and I am sure this is helping me improve my sightreading, so that's something I feel good about

Really the only instrument that I play that doesn't cause any physical discomfort is the recorder! Never mind, I'm in hospital again next week and hopefully I will be having nerve block injections, which will help a lot. I can also find out if my rib really is broken or not (though I'm pretty sure it is).

Many thanks again to all of you,

Toni xx

Hello Oboebunny,
I have been working away from home over the last few days and so have only just seen your post. I'm sorry to hear that you are having health problems and hope you managed to sort something out in your lesson tonight. I am learning to make reeds this year and have an hour's reed-making lesson once a fortnight (on top of my instrument lesson) so I'm sure this is something you could do instead of the instrument lesson for a while.

I'm sure teachers must be used to dealing with students' health problems. One of my oboe teacher's younger pupils broke her right thumb last year and couldn't play for almost two months. Although she only had a splint for about three weeks the doctor wouldn't let her play for another five weeks because he was worried about the weight of the oboe.

As for problems in a row, I think this must occur too. Last year my daughter broke her arm and was in plaster for seven weeks. Admittedly this was during the summer holidays so she didn't actually miss any cello lessons but it did mean that she didn't touch the cello all summer. She had about two lessons at the beginning of the school year and fell over in her ballet class (hardly a dangerous contact sport), knocked out a front tooth, pushed all the other front teeth up into her gums and needed four stitches in her lower lip. Although this didn't effect a part of her body used for playing the cello the psychological shock (coming so soon after breaking her arm) was important. She wouldn't go out of the house until her face had healed so she missed two lessons. For quite a long time afterwards she was completely lacking in self-confidence and she was playing the cello really gingerly as if she was afraid it would suddenly turn round and attack her. Her teacher just went back to very basic things (like playing only open strings) for about a month until my daughter was happier in herself.

Thanks kerioboe, I'm sure you can appreciate how rubbish I'm feeling right now because I can't play the oboe! I'm so glad that your daughter got her confidence back after all those accidents, the poor little girl, I'm not surprised she was so shocked and shaken up.

I've had a miserable day I was supposed to have my oboe lesson this evening, so I rang up my teacher to ask if she minded if I brought my violin or viola instead. She was teaching when I rang so I left her a message on her answerphone, then set out with the viola. I was feeling ill and tired and the journey from home to my teacher's takes at least an hour. When I got there, I discovered that I'd got the time wrong and had missed my lesson! My teacher had another pupil so I had to come home again, though she very kindly let me come and sit in her lounge to rest for a bit.

Sorry, I am whinging again!!!!! Luckily, due to the balance of nature (or whatever it is), one of my best friends had an absolutely brilliant day for once, so I was cheered up to hear all about that when I got home.

Oh no Don't worry about it, mix ups like that happen - I've gone to my flute lesson before to be greeted with "Hi, where were you?". *hugs*

That can be so easy to do. I did that once when I went for a clarinet lesson at 3:00 in the afternoon, when I should have been there at 13:00hrs - so I was two hours late.......

Best wishes for a speedy recovery Toni.

Get better soon Toni - Don't push yourself.

Thanks everyone - it's good to know that I'm not the only person to have missed a lesson by mistake!

I'm going to Shropshire for the weekend to chill out, then I've got a hospital appointment on Monday so should be a lot better after that

I hope you have a lovely time in Shropshire, I went there with my family earlier on this year and had a fantastic time. We stayed in a bungalow near Shrewsbury, and very much enjoyed going to the Ironbridge Museums and the Roman baths at Wroxeter. The Long Mynd is also nice.

I hope that you are feeling better soon.

Oh poor you! I really hope you start to feel better soon good luck with the hospital appointment.

Hi everyone,

It turns out that I have two cracked ribs, not one! So I won't be playing the oboe again this side of Christmas

I'm so fed up, I went into hospital on Monday for what I thought was a routine appointment for steroid injections, and they had me down for day surgery instead, to inject underneath my ribcage. I was totally unprepared for it and was on my own (I usually have a friend there to distract me) and the treatment was horribly painful. At one point I couldn't breathe and they thought they'd punctured a lung, so I had a chest x-ray which showed the broken ribs. Luckily I managed to keep my oxygen stats up by concentrating on breathing shallowly and slowly, as they were considering sticking a tube into the side of my chest!! ARGH. Anyway, I've taken the week off and have been chilling out at home, and the treatment has made it a lot more comfy for me to hold up the violin/viola, so that's good!!

Oh my..and you can still look on the bright side.

Just caught up with this thread. Lots of hugs and good wishes winging their way to you, Toni, hope you are soon feeling lots lots better, the ribs healed, and out of pain. How's cello playing? Is that any more comfortable?

Hi Jane, I'm fine really - it's good to have other instruments to play!!!

The cello is great, I'm going to get a luthier to have a look at it after Christmas, to try to make it a bit more playable. I had a go on a friend's cello and it was so much easier to play! Right now my viola is really comfy to play - I'm not so scrunched up around a viola as I am a violin - and it's so easy to tune it etc, so I've been concentrating on that. I'm OK with recorders too, though I get short of breath easily at the moment.

I'm hoping to do Grade 1 Viola and the Grade 1 Cello next year, if my teacher doesn't think I'm bonkers

Hope you're better soon!

Best wishes for a speedy recovery Toni.

Very pleased to hear the treatment has made playing your viola more comfortable. I'm sure you'll enjoy working towards grade 1 on both your viola and your 'cello.

Oh, and playing lots of instruments isn't bonkers!!!

Poor you! I hope you recover soon.

In the mean time enjoy the 'cello and viola, or just relax and play music you like and let someone else be doing the work for once....

I tried to find something to make you smile but not laugh - Clicky

Do it anyway, even if your teacher thinks you're bonkers!



Oh my!!! Showed that to Archie and he almost had a heart attack. He'll be having bad dreams of being chased instead of doing the chasing now!

Thanks everyone - and thanks for the bunny sneekymum, he's gorgeous!

Hi, just found this thread. Sorry to hear you're having such a bad time again . Pleased to hear that things are improving for you though . You're doing the right thing to give it a break and I'm sure you'll come back to it with a renewed enthusiasm when you're feeling better .

I thought bunnies were much smaller.

Hi again everyone,

I just thought I'd post to say thanks again for all your kind comments, and that I have cheered up immensely! I still can't play the oboe comfortably, but my oboe teacher is giving me viola lessons for the time being instead. I had my first viola lesson this evening and enjoyed it SO much! So basically I'll play that as much as possible until my injections wear off and it gets too painful to play it.....by which time I should be well enough to play the oboe again anyway

Liz will hopefully be pleased (though unsurprised) to know that my teacher was extremely impressed with my Gliga Gama viola

Glad to hear you've cheered up a lot - and glad to hear you like playing your viola so much.

Hey Oboebunny,

I've only just noticed this thread (we're preparing phonetics exams for four hundred students this week so I've had very little time to check the board!)... I'm sorry you've been having such a rotten time, but I'm delighted to hear that you can play your viola again - especially as you were so disappointed when you had to stop last time due to your health.

I hope your ribs heal quickly and well and that you can pick up your beloved oboe again soon.

love from France,

Allan

Dear Oboebunny
Sorry you're having such a hard time
Keep enjoying your viola, and take care of yourself. I'm sure you'll get back to oboe raring to go!
Love from sunny Yorkshire
Helen

Can totally sympathise with all that *gentlehug*

Though I've found most people don't think you're making excuses, and I tend to think those that do, well that's THEIR problem! Though I do still prefer to just be as normal as poss. Hate being labeled as that ill or disabled person. Glad your etacher was sympathetic



WOOOOOOOOO

Hopefully catch up soon Toni