I thought I'd make this thread because I've seen a few posts about people ranting about parents being unappreciative of music and the like.

With two very very unmusical parents, I get really annoyed when they try to involve themselves unneccesarily, my mum will tell me something like "oo that didn't sound right" or "that sounded sad compared to the bit before it". Then when I try to explain that it sounds "sad" because it's modulated into the relative minor, or because it has accidentals etc and that its SUPPOSED to sound like that, she gets all huffy and starts shouting about how am I supposed to know? and I was only saying? etc etc. When I go and sit at the piano and start playing, she also reguarily says "I havn't heard you practising your violin, shouldn't you be doing that?" when I have either practised it earlier when she's been at work/out. She says it at stupid times like when I have literally just put it down, and other family members can back me up that I've just done it. I do it whether she tell me to or not (and tbh whenever shes told me i've already done it!) because I enjoy doing it, but it drives me crazy when she says things that are so unhelpful.

Also, I have been told to work on getting crescendos/diminundo's within bars in a certain piece and so I went downstairs and asked les parents to say "loud" or "quiet" when there were changes in dynamics, the result should have been "loud" "loud" "quiet" etc, and they should have been saying it every few beats. I wasn't going to play the whole piece just a few bars to check that there were obvious differences. So they started off quite well saying loud loud etc, but they never said quiet, even when I played FF and suddenly went pianissimo they didn't say "quiet", now I know some of the dimunedos might have been hard to spot but this one was obvious. So after that I stopped and said "your meant to be saying quiet as well you know" and got the reply of "I know but I wanted to hear what was on tv". Whilst I had been playing and asking for help in the aid of an exam I have on tuesday she had wanted to watch TV! I turned round to see what she wanted to watch, I thought maybe something important news or weather etc, but I was faced with a QUIZ in which the questions and answers came up on screen!! So it wasn't as though she couldn't see what was going on. I got so frustrated, and she had a go at me. I was so annoyed because I didn't mind that they didn't spot some of the crescendos and dimuendos but she plainly didn't care or even try and there were really obvious ones. And my dad just sat there as well, grunting every so often, and even at one point said, "is this for your exam? your going to have to work on it."

Okay, so I'm just having a rant, and I appreciate how much they do for me, taking me to and from lessons. Paying for music etc, but sometimes they could just be a bit more supportive, I mean, they will just storm in or start shouting for me when i'm in the middle of playing a piece or something. Surely thats just inconsiderate. And if I try talking to them about it, my mum says that i'm being rude and selfish and ungrateful etc etc.

Anyways, it all just gets on my nerves!! So I thought we could have a thread where we can all come to rant about our parents, i mean they all get on our nerves at some point no matter how much we love them ey?

Oh and parents...feel free to complain about your little darlings, im sure we annoy you just as much as you annoy us hehe!!

x

ps: please don't think that I don't appreciate my parents because I really do. They do a lot for me and I know that!!

My parents aren't musical. They pay for lessons and I am very grateful for it, but they don't seem to understand much, and they don't understand how much importance I place on singing. Or maybe they do - often they shout at me for focusing on singing instead of schoolwork, but then when we have arguments they threaten to take away my lessons to make me apologise.

They whinge a lot, and make me feel guilty for the lifts to singing lessons and singing group and the cost of it all etc, and always tell me to shut up when I'm practising, but I do appreciate the opportunity to have lessons at all.

My mum is relatively musical (G7 piano about 35 years ago, managed to accompany me up to about G3/4), and my dad like listening to music but has never played. He in particular really likes coming to my school concerts, which is great.

Mum can be quite useful e.g. if I'm trying to learn a new scale or section of a piece and am having intonation issues she will play along with me if I ask her...the bit that irritates me is when she thinks she's being helpful by tactfully saying, "would you like me to play that with you?" when she hears something that's REALLY out of tune. I always know it's really bad, I just want to work it out for myself.

Dad sometimes makes odd comments, such as having remained silent for months while I practise G5/6/7 pieces, coming out with "wow that sounds good!" when I go back and play something I learnt when I was about 9 for fun. Also doesn't understand that it's not OK for my brother to play on the PlayStation while I'm practising. "Well as long as he turns the sound off it's all right, isn't it?" errrm no, not really, as brother tends to make sound effects of his own.

I do love my parents really.

Why not shut your eyes and imagine yourself in their place. Aren't they tired after a day at work? Can't you really tell yourself when you're playing FF or pp? Do you have an MP3 with record so you can see so yourself?



Wow, your first critic!

Have you never seen the Monty Python sketch where Beethoven's mother starts asking him if he's seen the sugar bowl, while he's trying to compose his 5th symphony? Then she starts hoovering round the piano!

You have to suffer for your art!

Steve

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKBwPx7s57c

No I havn't seen that sketch but I will have to see if I can find it somewhere. Sounds funny!


x

EDIT: ahaa, I see you have posted a link..I will watch now!

Perhaps your parents don't want to be labelled pushy?

Why when we should alll be able to understand the parent child relationship do we end up being damned if you do and if you don't?

Oh they can be perfectly pushy when they want to be!!

Isn't it always like that? You can never win! Haha.

Don't get my wrong, my parents are pretty awesome, and I know compared to some peoples they are really good, they can just be annoying at times. Im sure I annoy them a lot as well.

x

My parents are pretty good about music - they just leave me to get on with it mostly, which is just fine by me Although I wish they wouldn't protest at my acquisition of instruments, they have a point...

Steve - I just watched the monty python thingy. Made me laugh ALOT!!
x

My mum is not the slightest bit musical! She doesn't like me practising the clarinet because she can't hear the television/ concentrate etc. and if someone wants to watch the television in the room that the piano is in, they always get priority, and I have to either play really, really quietly (so i can barely hear it) or put some headphones in

You must have a digital piano although I suppose some kind of cool acoustic headphones could have been invented to be used in conjuntion with a super quiet pedal, working on the kind of principle at work when you tie string round a coat hanger and tie the other end round your finger and put it in your ears you get huge bells.

But back on topic I used to hate having the door closed on me lol, but I'm over that, I guess not everyone wants to hear me repeating and perfecting the same song over and over and they have complimented me when I've been playing moonlight sonata and stuff like that quite a few times over the years. Still a bit dry when noone seems to notice something thats far more technically difficult but I guess thats good for my character and goes to show that its not really about that.

Yes, I have a digital piano

Dear Maddielou

I speak as a non-musical parent of a musical, teenage son.

All parents like me are annoying. Not because we don't have your talent, but we stupidly forget that you are the centre of the universe and everything revolves around you.

We are imbeciles. We routinely lapse into reading our books or paying our bills or watching TV when you need us to be telling you whether you are playing louder or quieter.

We are morons. We forget that our role in life is to clothe, feed, educate, house and transport you without thanks. We are grateful for the scraps of recognition we get (being slagged off in public).

Best wishes

barry

at last, someone who understands.

I shouldn't laugh - but I did!

A strike back for parents everywhere!

Well, my dad is musical, and my mum is kind of musical, so I don't have a problem about them not understanding.

Barry whilst your comment is extremely amusing and I can see that I may sound spoilt etc, I do love my parents, I also appreciate just how much they do for me and its a lot more that unusual. My first post was simply a rant when I was annoyed at the time.
Sorry for any offence caused!!

I didn't want this thread to turn into an arguement, I just thought it could be a "rant" thread for students AND parents. If you read the original post I did say that we as kids must be annoying as well.

Again I apologise for any offence caused by the original post, it was just me "letting off steam".
x

Neither of my parents are that musical, and they don't know what can be called muscial and what can't. Becuase my brother is amazingly musical, they took that as 'normal' and so now I'm apparently really unmusical. So my parents forbid me to a music degree because 'there isn't any point'....

Of course your not unmusical.

My parents are both unmusical too!! Some of the things that you mentioned sound familiar!!

Whenever I play something wrong, my mum always goes "Oooh duff note" or "Laura you did that wrong", it's like yes I know I played it wrong, you don't have to tell the whole world...especially when there are people listening too!!

And then whenever they're in the room and I play accented notes or a passage that's forte/fortissimo, they're always like "Laura stop playing that so loud!" and it's like it says to be loud!!!

Tis quite funny sometimes though, I get my dad to sing stuff (he goes along with anything!!) and I've got him singing arpeggios and stuff, and I taught him what a melisma was the other day!

It's good in a way though, havng non-musical parents/family, because I really really love teaching them stuff!! I got my nan to play all the white notes from C to C an octave higher (not fingering) and she was so over the moon that she had played the C major scale!!

Laura