Some of you might know that I applied to Cambridge last week because my parents bullied me into it. I thought that if I applied and did get offered a place, I could always reject it so it wasn't such a huge deal. But now I'm worried about the interviews because I'll have grade 8 flute on the same week... I don't want to do the interview half-heartedly, but to me my flute exam is far more important because I don't really want to go to Cambridge anyway. I know that you have to do a lot of background reading etc in preparation for the interviews, but I simply don't have the time while doing all the other things I had planned to do before I decided to apply. I realise that I can't do both without dying of stress, but I don't know how to comprimise I also have grade 8 Speech and Drama the week before... I could easily withdraw my application, and I have thought about it, but if I do that my parents will have a go at me and I don't want to cause unnecessary trouble...
I'm really sorry for being so miserable, but I can't really talk to my parents about this because all they want is for me to get into Cambridge... Does anyone have any ideas on what to do?

why is it that your parents want you to go to cambridge above wherever you want to go? you've probably heard this before, but, ultimately, it is your life and future that is being decided. if your flute is very important to you (duh... that was a silly "if") then you will be happier afterwards if you do your best in that rather than compromise it. life is also too short to aspire to much other than happiness, so what would make you happy? if you don't really want to go to cambridge then giving everything up for that interview will perhaps leave you feeling fulfilled, but not in the area you want to be. why don't you want to go to cambridge?

Why not do the interview anyway? It'll keep your parents happy... and if, as you say, you don't actually care about getting into Cambridge, then you have no reason to get stressed about the interview. If you really don't want to go, then don't bother doing the background reading. Why would you if you're not bothered?!

In any case, Cambridge fellows are usually quite good at spotting whether or not somebody actually wants to go to Cambridge or not. They're also good at spotting whether said person would enjoy/fit in with Cambridge life. If you don't show a passion in your interview for your subject and/or the Cambridge course, then it's unlikely you'll be offered a place. All the people I know here are completely nutty about their subjects (even the physicists! in fact, ESPECIALLY the physicists!!)

If you think the interview will stress you out, or if (like me) you're one of those people who can't bear the idea of a rejection, then withdraw your application. But to be honest, I think you've got nothing to lose from going to it. It'll be good practice for interviews for other places too.

[Sorry if this sounds touchy. Being at Cambridge myself I tend to get rather protective of it... it's worse when there are Oxford types around! ]

The reason I don't want to go to Cambrdge is that I don't think I'd like the competitive atmosphere. Up till now I've always been one of the cleverer ones at school, and I've worked hard to keep it that way. But I think that if I suddenly was average or below, I wouldn't try because I'll know I won't be able to be the top however hard I try... Also I don't think I'm mature enough to be leaving home yet, I know that sounds really pathetic but I'm not sure if I'll cope with being away from home as well as working incredibly hard...

University is ALWAYS a competitive atmosphere. It doesn't matter where you go, there will always be some element of competition, and there will always be someone cleverer than you wherever you are. (I know, how would I know? Well, my dad's an academic and I've experienced quite a lot of other places... and I do have friends at other unis too!!)

Cambridge, as with all universities, is what you make it. True, there are times here when I've felt disillusioned (I was always one of the cleverer ones at school too, and now I'm in the bottom ten people in my year in my faculty). However, Cambridge is especially good for getting people to realise what else they are good at.

For instance, I discovered when I came here that I am absolutely brilliant at: making tea, organising football practice, conducting rubbish choirs (haven't been allowed a chance at the good ones yet!! lol), irritating my supervisors, sucking up to people in major companies persuading them to give the boat club money, being nice to first-years, filling out forms and getting ill. I've also discovered that I am mediocre at most aspects of academic music, but I'm still passionate about it. I've discovered that I'm really bad at: football, dancing, singing quietly, "composing in a late 19th century tonal idiom", musical analysis, handing work in on time, cooking, washing up. However, I still really enjoy them all! Hurrah!

As to being away from home, it's scary for a lot of people. My two neighbours come from an awfully long way away and they're coping fine. I didn't really want to leave home either, but I'm so glad I did: it makes one appreciate home more, and also makes one glad to be away from the kind of pressure that parents can put on you!

But anyway it's your decision. Good luck.

If I was your dad I'd say this.

"Stop worrying about the Cambridge interview immediately. Go there and be yourself. They're not interested in anyone you can pretend to be for a few hours and not so stupid as to be incapable of seeing through it. After all, you won't be able to maintain the pretence for three years.

"Go there and be yourself. If you are who they want, that's fine. If you're not it doesn't make you a bad person. It just means they're lookiing for someone else, in which case find the university that's looking for you."

But I'd also say, if I was your dad.

"If I've bullied you into this, I'm sorry. Don't go because of me and, if you don't want to, don't go at all."

barry

Looking at your list of universities, I think you are going to find them all competitive. Many people don't apply to Oxbridge on principle, and then end up at places like Imperial or Warwick, both of which have a fantastic reputation for Maths. What these universities don't have is the chance to spend every year of your course in uni accommodation with cheap catered food close at hand. If you're worried about coping away from home, Cambridge is going to be much easier than other unis. It's really easy to make friends in a college environment, and the pastoral care is excellent.

However, if you really don't want to go to Cambridge, I'd say pull out now and make the odds slightly better for the 1000+ other mathematicians who're keen to get in. It has to be your choice, not your parents'.

I was always the top in my class in primary school. Then when I got to secondary, I wasn't so I worked harder and from 3rd year up I was again in the top 3 in the class and got straight As at O and A level.......then when I got to Cambridge, I wasn't brilliant again......so I worked hard, and yes, it was a bit disheartening at first, but I had to learn a slightly different approach, and by the 3rd year, although I didn't get a 1st, I was viva'd for one (and just missed) but I did get one of the university music prizes.........but I enjoyed it, and that was the main thing - not whether or not I was the best......what I'm saying is that you needn't curl up in a corner just because you find there are those who might be better than you at your subject.......you can still enjoy the work and the social life and just the atmosphere of the university generally. I loved the sense of history of the place - walking through buildings that thousands of scholars had walked through for the past hundreds of years........


But it's your choice in the end. I'm not trying to sway you either way, just throwing in my own experiences. And in any case, if you do music, you can to some extent choose which lecture courses you attend on the music history side of things (I always went for the early music options) - so you're not really competing against the whole year as other people choose different options anyway....(cheebie correct me if I'm wrong!) but I seem to remember a few history options.......

I was in the same situation!

Cambridge interview - 4th December, grade 8 - 8th December!

Um. I'm sorry, I seem to have lost my words, I can't think what to say.

Random thoughts:
* Go where you want to - it is key that you are happy
* Do speak to your parents about pressure
* I didn't really do any background reading for my Cambridge interview, I guess it depends what form it takes. Which college?

It's Robinson College I rang them up today and they said that I could have a date that suited me best in the 2 weeks, but it's still the same really...
There's 3 interviews and a test, so I don't wantto be totally unprepared but don't really have the time for much extra stuff

I was thoroughly disillusioned, by the time I got to the interview, about Cambridge/the college I had applied to/the people who were applying for the same course . And it showed. And they didn't give me a place. BUT it was a good experience and I also came away knowing it wasn't "for me" which means I've never thought "if only" or "I wonder if..." So for me, at least, it was very much a good thing that I went to interview.

(The thing that put me off most was the people who said stuff like "suppose they offered you a place at one of the all-girls' colleges, you'd have to accept because it's, like, Cambridge!" - to which my natural response was "erm, no..." )

If you're willing to go and see, and just see what happens, then go for it, it's an experience, and it'll certainly give you a good picture of whether you actually want to go - and will lay to rest any nagging "what if?" doubts in the future.

But your flute exam is clearly more important to you, so spend as much time as you need preparing for that. If you have time over, once flute practice is beyond the critical mass stage (ie you're not going to manage any more that day, so you have time to spare, as it were) then spend some of that time prepping. But don't neglect your flute for an interview you don't think you care about, that would be a shame.

You should never do something you absolutely don't want, but nor should you dismiss something that might be wonderful. Give Cambridge a chance.

You only really have one shot at Cambridge interviews - you can do your flute exam next term (or any term) . Is it worth postponing it so that you can enjoy and make the most of both things ?

It's not really an option to postpone - I've already been entered, and doing the same pieces for another term would just kill them.
Thank you everyone for your replies. I have 2 weeks' half term from next week so hopefully I'll catch up with everything and do extra things during the holiday...

As has already been said, there's no harm in giving it a go anyway. You could just focus your time on flute, not put much preparation into the interview, and take it - if you don't get an offer, you never wanted one anyway, whilst getting decent training for other interviews; if you do, you can take time to contemplate whether you may change your mind to accept the place. Are you preparing for interviews at other Universities anyway? If so, you can get a bit of a head start - if you are applying now, the offers are going to be coming in soon anyway. If not, you wouldn't really be doing the interview 'half-heartedly' - you'd be doing exactly the same as your other interviews.


Besides, I think that they look for potential rather than the most well taught - i.e. you can expect people coming from certain schools offering Maths, Further Maths, Further Further Maths and Further Further Further Maths - but really that's not important. What's more important is probably to be able to grasp new concepts and how to apply them, and your levels of logic, etc. Of course, a bit of extra curricular reading around your subject never goes amiss, but it's not completely necessary if you really are particularly suited to your course.

~Wobby~

It's worth giving Cambridge a go - you might regret it later if you don't. Robinson has a reputation as one of the friendlier colleges with a better all-round mix of people.

If you don't want to detract from your grade 8 studies, I'd go as you are and be yourself. You may find that being relaxed about whether or not you get in counts in your favour and allows you to be more spontaneous in your replies. Besides, interview practice is always useful.

Robinson is a bit of a way out of the centre otherwise I'd say pm me and we could try to meet up for coffee. Are Mum and Dad going too. I seriously hope for your sake they are not! Then you can vent your spleen and talk about the interview. You never know you might even find you like the place.

Well my mum's coming, but I asked her to because I have to leave at about 5.30 in the morning and I didn't want to be on my own in the dark.
How much interview preparation do people usually do for Oxbridge? I've so far done nothing and I'm thinking that that's not a good idea....!

How are you coming?

Train

I've done none for Oxford. I read a lot, and that hasn't changed since I applied - nothing has. No interview has been offered yet though. I think you should just go, be you, and then let what happens happen. My parents put a bit of pressure on me to apply as well, and it's stressed me a bit, but then I just decided to stop worrying.

I'm in a I-don't-care phase now, so it's just going to be what happens on the day I think...!! My friends are going on courses and reading magazines and lots of sciency books and I feel that I'm being lazy...but I really can't be bothered any more!

I'm a mum who was desperately keen for one of my children to go to Cambridge. My husband went there, and his brother, so I wanted to continue the tradition. I took them both to the open day and they were both suitably impressed. One applied and got an interview for Trinity - but she didn't get in. Although I was disappointed to start with eventually I was just very glad that she'd tried for it. If she hadn't gone for the interview she, and I, might have spent a long time thinking "If only ....." She ended up in Durham, another collegiate university, and has never regretted it, and I'm really proud she's there.

So go for the interview. If you are offered a place you don't have to accept it. You don't lose anything by going for the interview, and you'll know that at least you had a go if they don't accept you.

I've done next to no preparation so far too. I have so many coursework deadlines in the coming fortnight. argh.



Is your interview on the same day as mine? (5th)?



[/memorylikeasieve]



My parents are intent on making a family outing of this interview, as both of them feel like skiving work that day to accompany me. o___O



Like you, there was a lot of pressure behind me by my parents, to apply to Cambridge. I've never seen it as an option to not apply. When I was younger, I did want to apply but then found out what the med course was like here and how different it was. I went through periods of applying where I didn't think I'd get in, I thought I'd hate it, I started to like it, I began to dislike it, I was just unsure etcetc.



Another thing with me, is that I don't think my parents really believe that I'll get in anyway. So the stroppy teenager side of me wants to get in and say, HA.



At the moment though, I'll just be glad to get in anywhere, and Cambridge would be as good as any other place...



Good luck with your interview hon!!

Mine's on the 3rd
My parents wanted me to go for it because they think I'd get in - I don't think so somehow. And it's not my first choice so it'll probably show in the interview so they won't offer me a place anyway

As said earlier, just give it a go anyway! There's nothing to lose.

It doesn't matter if you haven't read up before hand, etc. - after all, you are applying for Maths (I think), which is more down to innate logic than if you have read the latest New Scientist magazine, or whatever...

If you don't really mind if you get in anyway, then if you don't, you wouldn't have to see them again, so it wouldn't matter if it looks like you didn't put maximum effort into it or really want to go, and you wouldn't have to contemplate accepting or rejecting; and if you got in, they obviously thought you brought sufficient merit without having to prepare anyway, and wouldn't mind that you're not really into it, and you would be free to accept or reject the place as you see fit. Besides, who's to say that you won't love it when you go to see it, anyway?

Good Luck, both of you!

~Wobby~

I'm free in the morning (at the moment) for both of those dates, but need to be back in Burwell by 4pm which means getting a bus around 3pm.

There are loads of places in Cambridge to grab coffee or tea so if either of you are interested then PM me. The may be a vague chance I'll be driving a car again by then as well, but it still takes a guaranteed 45 mins to get back to my village at that time.

Never judge a place until you see it. I knew I wanted to go to Huddersfield as soon as I arrived there. Your preconceptions of Cambridge may change, Its a very pretty place.

Life is competitive - at uni, at college, in competitions, in the kid's playgroup where your child "must" be best..... and so on.

Running away from something because you think you might not be top isn't perhaps helping yourself to adjust to the realities of the adult life. I'd say go and have the interview, if nothing else for experience, and see what happens. You could have your worst fears confirmed, or you may be surprised. If you never go, you'll never know.

As to leaving home - sometimes people never seem to think they're ready to do so but, sooner or later, you've got to or otherwise remain with Mum and Dad forever. Going to uni/college is a good move away from home because you'll meet up with loads of people who, just like you, are going through the same stages of separation from parents, change of lifestyle etc. It's a big jump but it's also a necessary one.

Take one step at a time - go with the timetable that's emerging and then see what happens. What do your teachers say by the way?

It sounds to me like much of this is to do with confidence. Take a deep breath, and go for it. Best of luck.

I've been to see Cambridge, and liked the place. But I don't like the course and how they assess you etc - in London universities they have end-of-year exams every year which all count towards the degree, but at Cambridge it's all down to the finals in the 3rd year.
I've never lacked confidence before, and I know that I have a good chance of getting in if I go to the interview. If I do get a place there's going to be no choice for me but to go there - my parents have made that clear. So I'm kind of stuck...I don't want to fail the interview because then they'll see that as a failure, but if I get a place I can't go anywhere else. What I really want to do is to withdraw my application, but it's not looking like that's a choice either
My teachers say do what you like, but I think my dad's going to Parents' Evening this week to let them know exactly what he thinks

I don't think it's that simple for Maths at Cambridge. You won't get a place, you will get an offer which depends on doing very well in the STEP papers at the end of June. These are very difficult, so if you really didn't want to go, you could deliberately not do too well in them, I suppose. Just make sure your insurance UCAS option is the university of your own choice.

Also, you may not even get an offer, as virtually everyone who applies has fantastic AS results. AS Maths is really not difficult to do well in if you work hard, which is why Cambridge interview almost all those who apply. They are looking for real flair, and getting an offer will just depend on what you get asked on the day and how well you respond.

The STEP papers are really worrying me too - my college says that they give 3 offers for every 1 or 2 places, so the chances of actually getting in are really small. But my parents don't really know how it works, and every time I mention Cambridge to them it ends up as a shouting match. Also doing deliberately badly goes against everything that I am, and I won't be able to bring myself to do it.

if you enjoy Maths, you'll like STEP papers! Yes, they are difficult, but they're a wonderful challenge, and a refreshing change from the spoon feeding which A-level questions have become (you know what I mean - show this, then do that; what happens if the next thing). They give you something to get your teeth into, and some of your other universities will encourage you to take them too.

To be honest, if you don't like the challenge offered by STEP, you wouldn't enjoy the Cambridge course anyway. Not that I've done it myself, but my niece went; it's certainly hard work, but she has ended up as an actuary, which is very well paid, though it meant lots more exams after Cambridge.

I was in a similar position... I had one offer for a uni I wasn't especially keen on going to following the interview. Aware most applicants only got offered one place, I was happy with that offer. I was preparing G8 piano, had taken on musical direction for the school musical and then *bang* suddenly another interview appeared on the horizon. Right when G8/show was going to be. Panic set in, as you'd expect. I postponed G8 entry (indefinitely as it now appears...) and concentrated on the interview, using show rehearsals as a de-stress. Magic! Show was a hit, and gave me something interesting to chat to interviewers about. Interview a success. G8 remains a possibility

I didn't have to deal with much parental pressure, which certainly helped. I was however one of those top few in school facing being average at med school. I thought about working really hard and striving to be top....it lasted about six months! I much preferred running the musical, playing for variety shows and generally living life. I finished ranked in the top 40%(ish) of the year, but no higher, but I did so much other stuff it was worth it. I stayed reasonably close to home (mostly because I was teaching and didn't want to leave my students) and This gave me the opportunity to come home if it all went pear-shaped, but allowed me to live independently.

My advice to you is go to the interview doing as much prep work as you feel you can do without compromising the rest of your commitments. Enjoy it for what it is, use it as prep for other interviews and use your playing to relax as well as to work for your exam. Don't panic about the competitiveness, you will find that in varying degrees whatever you do and wherever you go. And don't worry about the offers-to-places ratio, they all do that. Good luck

I'm actually quite excited that two of you have Cambridge interviews. Whether you get in or not is immaterial, but I do wish you all the best. The Cambridge Students I know are generally happy there. I was born there. My mum was the Cambridge graduate and mum and dad moved there so mum could do her PhD.(which she got). She loved the place. She didn't come from a privilidged background she was a Grammar School Lass on a State Scholarship. So that knocks the Cambridge is for snobs idea on the head.

I wasn't Cambridge material at 18, however if I do a Masters its a place I would consider as they run a course right up my street and have library facilities to die for. Also I wouldn't have to move as for a post grad I meet the residency rules by 100yds.

See if its for you at the interview. My Step-dad also went to Cambridge and Read Mathematics, then specialisued in Computing for his PhD and set up two companies on the back of that. I've been brough up amongst the "Cambridge set" most of my life" - theyre actually nice people, not "up themselves" at all - infact rather down to earth. True they are polymaths with an interest in everything, but that just makes them more intersting and intreguing, and great company at parties!

It would be good to have some forumites around. You never know you might get yourselves carted off to Burwell for some music making and afternoon tea!

I don't think I did ANY reading in preparation for my interview - they really do look for potential not pre-polished material.

Then you can decide if you hate it or not... the interview also gives you a chance to ask questions about the course, so you can talk about the aspects that are worrying you!

I personally prefer the fact that it's only this year's exams that count - it meant I could try out lots of sports and clubs etc in my first 2 years without having to worry about the outcome! And it means that I don't have to worry about my result last year (a 2.ii) dampening my chances of doing better this year.

Good luck in your interviews. I will already have gone home, but I'll be thinking of you anyway!

I didn't do any preparation for my interview either. Maybe that was why I didn't get an offer, but I suspect that has more to do with lack of sleep (Pembroke is a drafty FREEZING place, however pretty) and the fact I got interrogated about C3 maths, when I'd spent the last 6 months doing M1 without thinking about that stuff!

(also I was applying for Chemical Engineering through NatSci: and compared to all the Alevel students that seemed to all have done 5 Science Alevels, I guess just Chemistry and Maths didn't seem as good.)

Similarly, like you, I wasn't really sure I wanted to go. I hadn't been to any open days (too expensive to travel that far)

After the interviews I was pretty sure the place wasn't for me. For a start, I didn't meet anyone else from a Comprehensive School in the 3 days I spent there. Secondly, no-one understood my sense of humour at all (I suggested (jokingly) one evening, that we all went and sat on the raised table reserved for professors or whatever, as it was probably the one time we could get away with it... you'da thought I'd suggested stripping and dancing naked on the tables from the looks I got...) Not only that, the majority of people found it downright weird that not only could I chat about Science, but I'd cheerfully discuss novels with those applying for English, building styles with the Archatect wannbes, and hold a conversation in German, with someone applying for that subject. I got thoroughly sick of curious questions along the lines of "So what ARE you applying for?" I just didn't seem to be specific enough!

On the other hand, I did find my interview a highly positive experience, and did enjoy the three days I spent in Cambridge. I learnt so much Chemisty off one of my interviewers. I treated the whole thing like a short break from all the stress of coursework, and college.

So definetly do your interview, but don't stress out about it. Afterwards, you'll know whether you've made the right choice or not.

And if you get a place, you really don't have to take it up. One of my housemates got an offer from Cambridge for Maths (having done ridiculously well in STEP) but turned it down to come here to Bath, mainly because he wanted the opportunity to study for a year in Germany (he did AEA in that too).

Your parents might not be happy, but you won't be living with them anymore, and as long as you excel and are happy in what you do after, they'll come round.

As for your concerns about living away from home, everyone has them, and you soon get used to surviving. House and flatmates are an invaluable mine of information, and if you have the intelligence to apply to Cambridge, you surely have the intelligence to open a book. And books do exist on cooking, cleaning and surviving as a student.

All the best with whatever you decide to do.

Thank you everyone I'm going tomorrow - leaving at 5 am...! I'm going to try my best, because, as my headmistress said last week, otherwise I might have regrets later on. I'm actually looking forward to going there, it's such a pretty place

Good luck!
MTTx

Best of luck, BBTOTW!

I have fingers and Bagpuss has paws crossed for you!

and have fun - that's the main thing

Good luck - you're right - it is a very pretty place, and there's a wonderful feeling of history as you walk round the older colleges.......thinking of all the past students studying there since 1209! (Although obviously not all the colleges were built then!!) Reading a history of Cambridge is very interesting......and also reading Susanna Gregory's historical whodunnit series which is set in the medieval university......

Good luck!

My interview's on Wednesday

One of my lovely Kodály students (taught her since she was in Reception ) has her Cambridge interview today (music). She wants to get in SOOOOO badly so I have fingers and toes crossed for her...

Is this one you want whisked away to Burwell to meet CW?

My friends Maths interview is tomorrow

I'm back It wasn't too bad, although I really didn't get on with the main maths tutor. But the other two tutor who interviewed me were really nice I wouldn't like to live there though...it's ok to be there for a day to enjoy the history etc, but living there would be a completely different thing I feel. But it's over now, I don't have to think about it till January! Good luck to everyone else who has interviews!!

Well done! What sort of things did they ask you? My son has gone up to Cambridge this afternoon - interviews are tomorrow morning.

I'm a bit late but...

1. GOOD LUCK. XDXD

2. WELL DONE.



Glad it seemed to go okay hon.

Mine on Wed now ... I'm still trying to cram. And I keep finding things that I probably should know that I ... dont.

*dies*

They asked me things on my personal statement, and a lot about whyI wanted to do maths. In the subject interviews, they got me to solve problems and there wasn't much talking
GOOD LUCK CPPF!!!! I'll be thinking of you on Wed!

Cambridge is a beautiful place in the spring. However If you don't feel comfortable with the place. There are many other good uni's other than Cambridge. I didn't study there, but having been born there I do have a love of the place.

I think Cambridge is a lovely city.
It also 'feels' academic, and I have always loved the times I have gone over there.

But of course, it isn't the ONLY university.