Slipped on the soap as she took a shower...

When it's Spring again, I'll bring again....

Hashish from Amsterdam


Raindrops on roses, whiskers on kittens

I'll come and visit when you are in prison!!

Love is a many splendoured thing!!

I'll only do that when you've done

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens

Ok I give in!

Its that floaty feel that makes you feel you're on angels wings

(no I don't do Hashish!)

When your'e lonely feeling small

And have no friend in the world at all....

Oh happy dames , that may embrace..... (H Howard)

throw custard pies around the place

There are worse things I can do

Than sit down and make music (or love ?) with you.......

The flames upspring, and cruelly they creep.... (Thomas Sackville)

Towards poor Daisy as she lies asleep.

See amid the winter's snow (into Advent now, so I think carols are fair game!)

Tacky houses all aglow...

Santa Baby! Put a sable under the tree for me...

Daisy baby, how happy we together could be........

When raging love with extreme pain most cruelly distrains my heart.... (Henry Howard, Earl of Surrey)

The christmas shopping forrays tear me apart.

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire

But if they split, and spit, it can de dire.....

My true love hath a heart, and I have his.... (Philip Sidney)

cheque book, so I'll stay a ms.

today is St Nicolas' day, so in honour ..

Jolly old Saint Nicolas, bend your ear this way

Please send me some 'naughty' toys so I can play............

Who is it , this dark night, underneath my window paineth.... (Philip Sidney)

'Tis I!!! And entry to your room I'll gaineth!

Yellow bird, up high in banana tree....

Come down here and make me a cup of tea


Long time ago in Bethlehem so the Holy Bible say

Forums there weren't in Bethlehem - what did people do all day ?

While shepherds watched their flocks by night, all seated on the ground

Some robbers stole into their hut, then left without a sound.

Past three o'clock and a cold frosty morning

I'll shoot that ######..I gave it fair warning!

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house...


**C*ck!**

Floated beautiful music by Bach and by Strauss.

I'm the fairy on top of the Christmas tree

Don't stand underneath, in case I should ###


The Holly and the Ivy, when they are both full grown

Could prick or poison you, so you'd fall down..........

My prime of youth is but a frost of cares........ (Chideock Titchborne)

I've lost count of the times I've fallen down stairs...

Frosty the snowman..

Doesn't have a willyman....

Wake now, my love, wake now, for it is time.......... (Edmund Spenser)

Oh..do I have to? I was having a dream sublime...

I know it's late, I know you're weary, I know your plans don't include me......

Go get along and do the job put up that Christmas tree.

Ding, Dong merrily on High

Please give me a nice mince pie.....

Come little babe, come silly soul.... (Nick Breton)

this is your brekkie now empty the bowl.


Good Christian Men Rejoice

But I cant sing, Ive lost my voice ......

Shall we go dance the hay, the hay......... (Nick Breton)

You betcha! Then in the hay we'll lay lay lay!!!

For unto us a child is born...

and it has screamed all night 'till morn

Wee Willie winkie runs through the town

His winkie flopping about as he jogs up and down.....

Love is in my bosom , like a bee...........(Thomas Lodge)

Will it sting if I get close to thee?

Mary, Mary quite contrary...

Fetch us yogurt from the dairy

Jack and Jill went up the hill

(dare I ask keep it clean please ??! )

for a bucket of soapy water.... (well you wnated it clean!)

A naked house, a naked moor..... (RL Stevenson)

A handsome man lies on the floor...

If I were a rich man..

I would buy a huge love van........

A weary lot is thine , fair maid............ (Walter Scott)

Until you came over and we played and played..


Poor Jenny is a weeping, a weeping a weeping...

Bur now shes content, and sleeping sleeping sleeping....

Absent from thee, I languish still........... (John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester)

But it's giving me time to learn how to trill

Play me a tune, you're the piano man...

Certainly will, a Beethoven sonata I can........


All human things are subject to decay..... (John Dryden)

But our love will last forever and a day!

Silent night, holy night...

Lets have a cuddle, in the moonlight...........

All my past life is mine no more..... (John Wilmot)

You gave it away? Whatever for?

Underground, overground, Wombling free, the Wombles of Wimbledon Common are we...

We pick up the litter, and go on a spree, and all fall asleep under a big tree..

All's over then, does truth sound bitter ...... (Robert Browning)

For goodness sake, get rid of that litter...

I asked the valley of echoes "Does she love me?"..

And the valley repsonded, I do love thee....

An age in her embraces passed......... (J Wilson)

Embrace her again? I can't be ar bothered....

I wanna be your sledgehammer...

Then you'd be my lovely rammer.....

And now, unveiled, the toilet stands, displayed....... (Pope)