I am prompted to post this because of the number of posts about badly behaved pupils - ie attitude in lessons - sudden cancellations - lack of support in schools etc

I am wondering if there is not an unspoken attitude in society that it is OK to demean and sometimes assault teachers because after all they are not important. This seems particularly applicable to music and drama teachers as they are not considered to be core subjects.

I don't teach in the state system and I teach what could be considered as "populist" instruments such as rock guitar - blues - jazz piano - electric bass etc. However I do teach classical singing techniques and classical guitar

I do not get a lot of aggression from pupils because although 62, I am a big, pig ugly and quite muscular
I also have parents sit in on my lessons which reduces the attitude levels

I am wondering what other teachers find. I have been teaching for about 6 years and have had a background in public speaking/training and lecturing which goes back to 1965 so I am not inesperienced, however, next year I will be introducing for new pupils terms and conditions which I have not done before

! Are you sure your not a bouncer? I'm sadly just pig ugly!

I am not a bouncer - too much hair - any parents would object to kids bouncing around the room
One male parent did look interested when I suggested we strangle his 7 year old and bury hin in the garden and drink Belgian beer instead

Before you call the police - I am very fond of the little pupil concerned
He knows it and he knows it is just a joke
We have both explained to him that it is all a joke and he knows it - I have just advised the parents on a new guitar for him

I must day that I haven't really noticed a lack of respect that's specific to music teachers. If anything I find most people are grateful for effort put in. But then I only teach privately and at home, so it's pretty well guaranteed that my pupils are there because they want to be, and the parents are on their side - and mine. The occasional blip has come with regard to insufficient notice for termination of lessons, but the people concerned genuinely hadn't decided to quit until the last minute - I'm not excusing them for this - but I think it's indicative of our society rather than indicative of a lack of respect for music teachers in particular.

I don't have, and never have had badly behaved students. Last minute cancellations have only ever been for emergencies/illness, as they are made fully aware at the start of lessons that these must be paid for.
I think that how Joe Public perceives the private teacher is down to the teacher's demeanour, and whether they command respect in the way they behave and deal with the public.
However - I only teach one-on-one. I wouldn't teach in a school classroom for all the tea in china.

You are not! I've seen your profile pic

I think it's not only music teachers but teachers of all subjects that get less respect now than they used to, especially in schools. Perhaps it's because the authority teachers have is contantly undermined? It seems now that students and parents are far quicker to complain to a school about a child being told off, when before it was just tough luck.

I know what David means about people thinking private teachers just wait by their instruments all day and do nothing in between

Yes this has been my (limited) experience. I have two girls who travel about 20 miles to have singing lessons with me at the same time. They are cousins and one of their mums brings both of them each week. Every week I check at the end of the lesson that they are ok for next week. Along comes next week, 4 hours before lesson I get a text saying they forgot that neither mother is able to drive that week!


I have also found that it is the adult pupils who think they can get away with whatever they like. Another pupil recomended me to a lady who wasn't happy with her current teacher. I carry out a free consultation lesson we get on great and we book her in for a month of lessons starting in a few weeks time as she had to complete the lessons she had already paid for with her current teacher. I turn up on the agreed day at the right time - she opens the door half asleep in her pajamas, barely recognises me and then realises that she forgot she had to work a night shift and wouldn't be up to the lesson! She apologises and says she'll pay me for the lesson still. I'm prepared to go there again - a few hours before lesson she calls to say shes got a migraine. The next week she says shes still not well and she'll call me when she's ready for lessons again - well that was about 7 weeks ago and I'm not holding my breath! I came to the conclusion that she didn't have the guts to cancel with her old teacher in the end but it annoys me how there are only a few businesses where people think they can get away with messing you around like that.


Sarah

Right now, following a most unpleasant convo with a pupe's parent, I feel I am the absolute lowest life-form known to man.

Honestly, self-esteem has just taking a serious nosedive...

I think the general feeling is that what we do isn't a "proper" job - let's face it, all I do is just blow and move my fingers. Nowt skilled in that surely?

Sorry, going away now to lick my wounds....

Bag x

This is why I insist on contracts. Explain this is my job, my qualifications, and that I am a member of a professional body supporting professional musicians. I think all MU and ISM members should stress that bit. I pay particular attention to cancellation charges and notice periods, explaining that it is at my discretion that they may be waived and it should not be assumed.

Too many adult pupils and parents are likely to think that just because you teach at home it is a hobby or just pin money. You have to be hard nosed where money is concerned. If I have learnt anything since I've started teaching it is not to be too leanient!

How true that is! A pupil once asked a piano teacher friend of mine what he did for a living

When I started out in teaching nearly 20 years ago, and moved to this town, I started to advertise....I got the phonecalls coming in - and interested-sounding voices - until I told them the lesson fees......."How much???? Miss X only charges HALF that amount!!!!" Yes, but Miss X was in her 70's back then, and she was teaching to make a bit of pin money - I on the other hand was trying to make a living!!!

I feel very fortunate in having had a collection of parents and pupils who seem to respect me and what I strive to do for my pupils. Occasionally I've had one or two who take a liberty, but they have been rare and I have been able to put them down to experience.

Having taught classroom music very briefly in a state primary (really only to get the school a good ofsted report I subsequently discovered), I may say that I felt a little undervalued there, although the other teachers all worked extremely hard and were no doubt under serious pressure.

However in conversations with friends who teach in classrooms full time, or lecture at universities, I feel that they think that I "don't do a proper job" because I'm only teaching "little ones" or "at home", on a one to one basis. I find that quite hard and demoralising and therefore tend not to mention my music teaching at all, or at least be quite dismissive of it. I am trying to talk myself out of this frame of mind because I feel I do a valuable job and I'm reasonably successful.

When peopl.e say it is "easy" to teach at home point out

1 Marketing to recruit pupils
2 Retention of pupils
3 Preparation
4 Money chasing
5 Dealing with cancellations and sickness

It is a business and not a job and involves time, talent and capital to build up
I am proud of my teaching business - no one gave it to me, I made it myself

This should be be the attitude any private teacher tell your "friends" they are payroll bandits who are too
scared to cut it on their own

Here, here! Tony! I had a pupil's mum who joked and said but it will cost you a stamp. I said yes, and the cost of the envelope too, however that is taken account of when I set my lesson fees.

I've another one for you
6. maintaining your own technique so you are still good enough to teach to an appropriate level.
7. Professional development.
8. Dealing with your own administration which may include accouting and tax or at least appointing someone to do that for you.

I'm proud of my business to and in addition to your list to took tenacity to build it up. I'm a sole trader, I teach my way based on the sound teaching I received from the teachers I had from Childhood onwards, and recent comments on exam sheets completely vindicate my methodology and raison d'etre that I am training musicians as well as good technicians on their instruments.

Wow!! Do you want the pupil if the parent behaves like this?

As a parent I value any help that the girls receive from whoever is teaching them, formally or informally. I don't see the point in paying for something or agreeing to participate if you are not prepared to do your best. The girls know this and hopefully behave accordingly despite their imperfections and raging hormones.

On the other hand I am more inclined to speak out if they are told off for something unfairly(if it's fair then I will always tell them that). This has happend at school to by eldest recently (not music related). I suppose that I expect the teachers to respect my children in return for being respected. I think it's important in a society where manners and correct behaviour are often not reinforced at home sometimes school staff will treat all pupils the same. It's never been a problem with their music teachers though.

Over my years of experience, I learned one thing: The status of a (private) music teacher very much depends on how we present ourselves. Many people teaching at home forget that they are running a business. I always stress out, although I am teaching in a place that is my home the rest of the time, that I am running a business, as others have already mentioned. If I don't get that across, I cannot be surprised that people don't take me for serious.

For me, this means:
I do not meet my students like friends. I don't wear my oldest jeans or my baggiest jumpers because they are comfy, but rather "business-like" clothing. Not over the top of course, but who of you wouldn't feel strange if their solicitor greets them in his oldest clothes? This has to do something with professional attitude. I DON'T mean that the guys have to wear a suit and the girls dresses, but the joggies are not necessary either

I make clear straightaway that I am a pro, that this is my main source of income and that I have Terms & Conditions (which I still have to modify every now and again because there are still people who try to take advantage). If I present myself like I do this for a bit of pocket money or as a hobby, I cannot be surprised that people treat me like an amateur.

I always try to keep professional distance, because I am not a buddy. If I don't, I again cannot be surprised of being treated as such. It is normal that we as teachers connect stronger with some students than with others, stil there is a fine line between being a professional and getting too personal (and I DON'T mean this in a s'exual context, please no discussion about this subject ).

To cut it short: I think the lacking respect towards private music teachers is partly the teachers' own fault. These Forums showed me more than once the lacking professional attitude of some teachers, their fear (!) to be strict about their T&C's, being almost apologetic if they have to ask for money and their negligence of running a PROFESSIONAL business, with everything that involves.
It doesn't help either if the ones who are more hard-nosed about certain things are frowned upon as being too strict or unforgiving. If parents and students experience that some music teachers charge widely under the going rate, don't charge for missed lessons etc., they will expect this from every other music teacher. The surprise is big if they find out that other teachers don't work this way, and then we get those endless discussions ("But teacher X did this and that and didn't do this and that!").

It is a homemade problem, and every music teacher should really question themselves whether they present themselves in a professional manner. Those ones who don't make it very hard for the ones who do. I know this sounds harsh, but this problem is far bigger in our business than in others, and I still don't understand why things that are considered normal for so many other professions are not valid for our profession, and the teachers themselves feel reluctant to just RUN A BUSINESS...

Thanks Mezzo. Even when I wear jeans they're smart jeans, though mostly I tend to wear a skirt and a longsleved top. When I turn up to accompany for an exam, I treat it as if I'm dressing for a proper concert. Contracts are always in place, and receipts always issued. All correspondence always carries my professional qualifications.

Things will look even better in January when the Piano is moved out of the Dining toom into my "office/studio"

A room where there is space to teach theory, my music library will be fully at hand, the piano will be clear of music , a full length mirror will be placed on a wall for singers to see themselves, and a solif rather than collapsible music stand will be available.

The cats may still walk in and out, but by having a clearly defined space, My LRSM and Degree Certificates on the wall, and some other music related posters the plus the contract the accounting and everything else, then I hope the word Professional will basicallly speak for its self.

You are right though, too many teachers are just not hard-nosed enough about the business skills! That reminds me I need to write a letter to a Pupil's father who quit owing me cancellation fees and not paying his notice period. I'll do it gently, before I call in the ISM.

Thanks, both. Very eloquently said. That's what I was trying to say in two sentences! LOL
I do agree it helps to have a room dedicated to music and teaching - I call mine my studio. But my dogs are never allowed in there - to me that would be introducing domesticity into a professional environment. (sorry, Jod, we'll have to agree to differ on that one!).

From the perspective of an adult student, I mostly agree with Mezzo1974. I don't care what my teacher wears (within reason!) but I do expect professionalism, and that includes an awareness that I'm a busy person too and I'm paying for a service. I've had teachers who are so disorganised that they postpone or cancel lessons at the last minute; who are not there, or not expecting me, at the agreed time; who waste time during the lesson, or cut the lesson short; who have no idea what they plan to teach, or how they plan to do so. I'm sure the teachers in these forums don't behave like this, but it isn't really very surprising that the general public doesn't have a high regard for music teachers.

Then I'm afraid teachers as you describe give our profession a bad name.

Mezzo 1974 well said. If we run our business like a part-time cottage industry there is no way we are going to be taken seriously.

Susie - there is one word which I find helps when people ask what I do - and that word is
FREELANCE. I'm a freelance music teacher. Try it next time someone asks - and say it as if you're thinking "aren't I lucky !"

Thanks maggiemay, I'll remember it when I'm out having conversations. It'll be part of my New Year Resolution to improve my morale.

*feels very unprofessional*

I teach in my dining room which has the piano - table folded; instruments, stand, music brought through. I usually wear jeans, though at least not dirty or ripped jeans. I don't display my certificates as it's hardly appropriate for the rest of the week or to put them up and down for the few people I teach at home. My only 'professional' feeling comes from my qualifications and the care I conduct my actual teaching, the latter being what really matters. And of course I am in the MU.

I agree musicians in general can be seen as somehow not worthy of the profession it is, and I don't think it's our own fault all of the time. It's just an attitude in our society. Music (as we know it anyway) is not a priority for society as a whole like many other things are.

.

It's worth pointing out that this is a problem (though they might not know it) as much for the client as for the professional private teacher. On more than one occasion I have known pupils change teacher because of the teacher moving away/starting a family/etc, and been horrified at having to turn up every week or else pay twice as much for the missed lesson as they would have paid for the ones they deemed to go to in the past. So their response was to find another unprofessional teacher - who probably wouldn't have so many pupils if his/her 'calibre' was assessed purely on teaching ability.

Yes I've recently taken on some pupils who were previously being charged £6 a lesson, and although my fees are quite average, it's still a lot more than they were paying before.

The new pupils' playing shows they have been taught well, and I know the past teacher is qualified and experienced. This teacher has done a good job....but for so little!

I think the fact that anyone can set themselves up as a private teacher means you have to go that extra mile to prove you mean business and take the whole thing seriously.

One of my first students was an older lady, and after her first lesson she asked to be reminded of the fee. "£8! No no, you'll take ten and I don't want any change!" She obviously valued me more than I valued myself at the time!

Well I'll see how people feel about this subject at the ISM Advent Party on Wednesday. Thus far I have been teaching in my dining room, but unless my kids are ill, they do not interrupt lessons. It's a golden rule. The extension has been built to accommodate the fact that they are now getting older and are likely to be up later.

The cats are around, but they do not stop me from concentrating on teaching. I suggest that all teachers who want to be taken seriously join either the ISM or MU.

I joined EPTA last year and leave the magazines in the rack for parents who arrive early. It's just another way to help them see that I do a lot more work out of teaching hours.

The dog sleeps beside the piano during lessons at my house. There would be an outcry if I took her out of the room now!

To be honest, I'm not sure how many people do think of music teachers in general as unimportant, or doing a professional job. I've encoutered a few ignorant people outside of work, but the parents of my pupils seem genuinely appreciative and I don't get the feeling they think I'm second rate simply because I work at home. I get that more from "friends" who tease that I have an easy life!

I know Bagpuss has, from time to time, been on the receiving end of comments from parents such as, 'Oh, I see you're knocking off early today!' (5pm on a Sunday) and, on more than one occasion, 'It must be nice to work part-time'...

A general question from an adult learner and parent - and being something of a devil's advocate......

Do you enjoy what you do? I ask this question because Mr LT is a brilliant artist. I have often wondered whether he should give up the day job to concentrate on his art but he rather wisely says that it might cease to be a pleasure if he was expected to make money from it.

Does the teaching of music detract from your enjoyment of it or are you able to dissociate at the end of a long teaching day? And if you don't enjoy it but do it because it pays the bills, is it possible that this translates into your teaching?

Pupils pick up on more than you think and there's nothing worse than a lack-lustre teacher that fails to inspire. I know that I would prefer to have a less well qualified teacher who made lessons enjoyable than a highly qualified teacher who would rather be somewhere else.

The wide variation in teaching ability does have a negative impact on public perception of music teachers and letters after a name do not a great teacher make - which makes us all the more sceptical. And appearance isn't everything - it doesn't bother me if the teacher wears jeans - recently my piano teacher has been wearing slippers!

Yes - I do enjoy what I do - in fact I was only thinking this evening that I would do it for nothing except that that sets a precedent and would deprive me of my income. It's the teaching bit that I particularly enjoy.

I have to say that I do not play so much for my own pleasure now, and I suppose I have turned what I had started as a child as a hobby, into my job, which means I need to look elsewhere for the hobby. But I think that music is simply something I do, I don't think of it as being a hobby, or being my job - it just is.

I sing in a choral society which is the hobby aspect of things, but then I'm applying my musical knowledge there - it's all too confusing - the only thing I can say with any certainty is that I would find life totally unbearable without music.

And I'm always wearing slippers when I teach as that's what I wear in the house.

I love teaching piano

I know a lot of people seem to have less time for their own music, but I've found I practise even more than I did before I started taking on pupils.

The students all have different tastes, and with the more advanced ones especially, I'll spend a lot of time finding music I think they'd like and learning it myself as well. Lots of the music I may never have played if it hadn't been for them.

Then there's the times in between pupils. Once I've had my coffee I'll go straight back to the piano again and wait for them, so all those little breaks add up to even more practise! I don't find I get sick of looking at the piano when I've been teaching all day, as I'm doing different things in my own time than I do with the students.

It's true I'm not earning a fortune at the minute, but then I'm lucky in other ways in that I look forward to work rather than dreading it, which lots of my friends do.

It's comforting to read your replies `Music just is' is a great way of putting things......

My violin teacher (jeans, rude T-shirts) and piano teacher (slippers - no curlers - yet ) have both said much the same. They both live for music and can teach solidly for hours - they're positively energised by the interaction with their pupils, even if they've had a rough day/late night before.

I suspect it's not for everyone - it takes a certain temperament to be able to teach and to inspire/be inspired by teaching.

As a parent two things that wouldn't really effect what I thought of a Music Teacher.

What Certificates they hold

How they dress particularly in their own home (providing it wasn't inappropriate).

A well behaved pet being present would only be an issue if the girls were distracted by it, as they both love animals, they might be inclined to play it too much attention.

The only thing that interests me when I'm paying for a service is how that is delivered. The teachers attitude and ability to teach would far out weigh anything else in how I responded to them.

I think society's attitude has deteriorated generally and that is the biggest factor in how people relate to one another. What right have we to judge how someone lives their lives? We are paying them to teach Music and it's only this issue that should be important to us, it's none of our business as long as the children are not being put at any risk.

The worse thing was when I did my LRSM. A lot of my friends are doing NVQ level 2 and 3 qualifications and there I was doing an exam, they asked what level it was, and were astonished when I said Level 6! It was then they realised that I was a pro. I went for lessons was doing all this research work at home and practice for an exam they could never dream of. They now I'm starting the research work into my FRSM, and have pro level work coming up as well as teaching. Eventually I think the penny is dropping.

One of the kids at my son's carol concert complained when I joined in with "we wish you a merry christmas" well I was asked to sing it and sing it I did, unfortunately It was louder than everyone else put together. I wasn't risking my throat that day so had to sing it properly, and that was only piano! Beside's that something I sing classically rather than use natural voice or Belt and Mix!

I've just learnt to be organised and hard nosed. Having a PC in a room is useful, as I can quickly check syllabi, titles of music, and for my schubertline subscription print things out in the lesson.

Lessons are planned in advance, and back up plans are in place if a student has done no practice.

I'm sometimes in slippers too or stocking feet, but I'm teaching in a house, and not a school or university environment.

The only thing that interests me when I'm paying for a service is how that is delivered. The teachers attitude and ability to teach would far out weigh anything else in how I responded to them.

Yes, I think these are important things. Commitment and a professional and organised attitude to work and timekeeping really are vital.

Neil and others - I don't think using an ordinary domestic room makes you less professional. It was a long time before I had a room that I could (more or less) regard as my teaching studio. You just need to be very determined and very tidy !

What we wear is an interesting one. Can't help feeling a touch of bohemian flair fits the musician image and although I hate to be sloppy, it's possible that a too-formal appearance could be slightly intimidating for a nervous or a very young student.

I'll happily teach in jeans (tidy though and not baggy) and flipflops in summer, but not track-suit bottoms, and I draw the line at slippers I'm afraid - unless they are the ones that look more like indoor shoes. I try to make sure the cat is fed before I start, and in fact she rarely comes into the room when I'm teaching.

yes, I enjoy what I do - at least most of the time. I like the sound of your violin teacher, LT!

The only time I actually change my clothes when teaching is in the summer if i've been wearing shorts all day for comfort. I'll put on a skirt or dress before students arrive.

I've discussed this with parents as well and other teachers! The general feeling is that they aren't fussed on what I'm wearing.

I'm always tidy, clean hair & make-up (well, at least a bit of touche eclat...can't be seen without that!) but mainly wear jeans (not scruffy ones) and a top.

Sometimes I put a dress on, but then the pupils ask me why I'm "all dressed up"

I'm careful where I get my clothes now after an incident where a ten year old pupil was wearing the same t-shirt as me last summer. I'm small, and picked it up in the supermarket when I was shopping. I rarely try things on if they look the right size, and it fitted fine. It turns out it was a kiddies top, and mum probably knew where I'd got it from too

So, some days I look more like a "teacher", and other days I've got Zippy from Rainbow on my t-shirt... The main thing is, I'm clean, I'm present at the right time, the house is tidy and the lesson is planned!

The dog being there is a nice ice-breaker for first time students who are nervous. If she was a big smelly dog she'd be out, but she's a spoiled little dachshund who gets pampered and brushed every day and usually smells of tea tree shampoo

Things have been more chaotic this term, however everyone was warned about this in advance. There is always some disruption when you are having building work done. The to top it off I was ill to and as soon as I was up to it taught.

However I still had everything to had ahead of the start of a lesson.

I unfortunately lost two pupils when my husband decided to start a blazing row with me as they were arriving. I was extremely cross with him for doing this. It reflected very badly on me. It was perfectly possible for him to eat his meal elsewhere.

He too has got to understand this is my Job and not my hobby. If he doesn't the children never will and this is so it is so important I move out of my dining room into my studio. The space will be clearly demarkated for everyone to see, pupils and family alike.

Roll on the completion of my studio.

I know how you feel, Jod. My husband hated being the other side of the dining room door and listening to singing all night and every Saturday. As it was a lounge/diner he had nowhere to go other than the conservatory, and he had to go outside through the rain because he couldn't get through the dining room patio doors. When my studio was built it was heaven. And, believe me, the students really do see you in a different light when you have a room dedicated to teaching which isn't part of your living accommodation. Hubby is happy too!

Yes, very much, because otherwise I wouldn't do it. I made the decision to cut down performing in favour of teaching some 3 years ago and haven't regretted it for a single minute since. But I agree that not everyone can teach - it is surely not a "second-best-solution". You need a certain character for it ...



Yes, students DO pick up a lot, and that's why I don't greet them in my comfy-clothes, but in neat and tidy ones. I don't think that the discussion here went right by most of the people going like: "But I do wear jeans and it's not a problem..."
I never said anywhere we shouldn't wear jeans, what I said was said I don't wear my OLDEST jeans and my BAGGIEST jumpers. I am a working professional and want to be seen as such. I cannot see myself as one if I run about like I am too lazy or too sloppy to tidy myself up. And I strongly believe that this DOES affect the way other people see us.
It would be an absolute no-no for me to greet my students in slippers. If other people want to do so, that's fine, but it's an abolute no-go for me since it would show that I feel like I want to chill out in front of the TV. Someone said: "That's what I wear at home". I think this is one of the problems: Many people mainly see it as the home, not the place where business happens. There are times when this is my home, and there are times when this is my office, and this is NOT the same. I normally don't wear slippers in an office, do I? I don't greet customers in slippers in a shop, do I? For me, dressing tidily has to do something with respect for myself and my students. It is exactly this "bohemian attitude" and the complete negligence of the smallest business-123 that gets musicians into trouble all of the time and makes it difficult for them to be taken seriously. And then they wonder why most people still see us as amateurs or people who earn a bit of pin money

And the most important thing:
I am NOT a private person when I am teaching. That students see us as such is exactly the point where problems arise, because if we get too private, that normally means we lose the healthy distance we need for teaching, which makes it easier for people to see us rather as a buddy than a professional (or even lose respect). And it makes it harder for ourselves as well to be hard-nosed in certain aspects. I notice that myself: I have some students I bond stronger with, and deep inside, I feel more inclined to have a more relaxed attitude. Which isn't good, because it opens the door towards not treating everyone equally. That's a reason for me to really always try and keep professional distance, and one way of doing this is not giving away too much of my privacy and not to meet them like having a chat with my best friend ...

One thing at the end:
Exactly the sentences: "There's nothing worse than a lack-lustre teacher that fails to inspire. I know that I would prefer to have a less well qualified teacher who made lessons enjoyable than a highly qualified teacher who would rather be somewhere else" shows me one of the main problems:

To put it in a sentence like the above one gets the picture wrong. Of course letters behind the name are not a guarantee for good teaching. But this was, imo, not the original question (we had discussions about this subject before). The question was how society sees us. And I am afraid that if we show them people in slippers with untidy hair who teach between nappies, dishes and breastfeeding (I am deliberately exaggerating now, please don't get me wrong!), that's exactly what they will see: Not a professional ...

Some of my unprofessional moments: (Just some examples;I'm sure there's lots more!)

1/ When the new kitten wee-ed on somebody's music.
2/ When every pencil in my jar needs sharpened.
3/ When two new pupils and 4 parents all arrived at the same time - self having been the one to get it wrong.
4/ When I assured somebody that they'd payed me and I'd lodged the cheque - and then it fell out of a book in front of our eyes.
5/ When my music room is quite simply a bombsite.

However I think we need to differentiate between what affects our performance in the job and what is simply 'appearances' - and I think pupils and parents know the difference too. When the two new pupils arrived at the same time I didn't take the money from either of them - I managed to conduct a thirty minute 'finding out' session, after which all seemed suitably impressed and decided to continue. And the reason pupils often arrive to find the music room a mess is because I've been rummaging for appropriate back-up material when somebody needed something with simpler pedalling, for instance, in order to get the hang of how to do it well in the piece that they're trying to master. (Random example...) Rather than tidy up my rummagings immediately I prefer to leave it till later and squeeze as much as possible out of the pupil's half hour.

What I've never done is cancel a lesson or be vague about what I expect from the pupils in exchange for what they can expect from me. Something that I think is probably the most unprofessional thing of all is to continue accepting money on behalf of a disinterested child. Whether you wear slippers or stilettos is beside the point.

A very interesting thread which makes one realise how many different circumstances there are in which people teach.

The status of teachers in general is a question to which I think it is time society paid serious attention. There have been a number of cases here of classroom teachers being physically attacked and I imagine similar things happen in England. There are, out there thousands of very nice young people who are brought up in a spirit of respect and who work hard at their education and who will eventually take their rightful place in society as responsible and informed adults. But there is a growing number of people, both parents and children, whose attitude to authority ( and I mean authority exercised with respect and with the well-being of the child in view) is one of total intolerance.

This past week I witnessed a three year old hitting his mother because she couldn’t find his teddy bear, which he had thrown on top of a high cupboard. I was not unduly shocked that a tiny child with difficulty in expressing himself in words should throw a tantrum. I was shocked that the mother ignored it. I also had a father who more or less told me I didn’t know what I was talking about when I suggested that the reason his daughter had difficulty in playing her recorder was that it wasn’t the make I had asked parents to buy but a very old recorder he had used as a boy. And for the very first time I had a child in a piano lesson try to defy me – an intelligent five year old girl who is physically big for her age. She has six older brothers and over the last few weeks gate crashed the lesson of the next brother up so I said I would take her with him as a shared lesson. This looks as if it will work well but I am going to have to be fierce until she realises that we can’t have fun together unless she toes the line.

On the point of status I feel that we are often undervalued because “anyone can show a child how to do something”. Every one has been to school so everyone thinks they know how to teach and when teachers don’t do what parents think they should, tension arises. I don’t mean that teachers are always 100% right, but we do have professional training and experience. After all, no one tells the electrician or the plumber how to do his/her job.

I feel particularly undervalued by the president of the Association for which I work. I get on well with her, she leaves the content of my music lessons to me, she is mildly pleased at our AB results. But I know she thinks it’s all rather like a game. Over the past eleven years I have had 127 exam successes with a reasonable proportion of merits and distinctions. Not once has she suggested we put an item in the local press, not once has she ever supported me when I have talked to groups of parents about the value of instrumental learning. When I asked if there was any possibility of changing our 12 year old Roland for something more worthy of my older pianists I was given the impression that I really was asking for rather a lot!

There is a similar attitude towards music at the college and lycée where I have tried to introduce a bit of musical education. Music is not essential. It is just a cherry on the cake and time is not to be devoted to it. What gets me is that no one realises what can be done. I’m banging my head against a brick wall.

However, there is a ray of hope. Things go well at the junior school and are appreciated and this year I have managed at last to persuade the college to let their first years join with the junior school for a musical nativity play. Rehearsals are now going well and I know it will be enjoyed. But I suspect that very few teachers and parents apart from my junior school colleagues will realise what a real educational experience it is for the children to take part in this sort of thing. For every one else it will just be a show – another cherry on another cake and it doesn’t really matter if we do any more music or not.

What we are really talking about here is respect - something that is sadly in short supply whatever profession you are in - and a sad reflection of our society in general.

I was a youngster when "Grange Hill" was first aired - and I strongly believe that this show spelled the beginning of the end of respect for teachers in schools. Kids always want to 'get one' over adults - I encounter such with my kids every day - and to most of us school-kids watching the show back then, we knew it was an exaggeration of school life created for 'entertainment' purposes. However, little by little, as more of these types of show appeared (Tracey Beaker springs to mind...) the authority of adults has slowly been eroded away, compounded by lack of discipline in the home. It is no surprise that, now some of these kids are parents themselves, they continue to exhibit the sort of behaviour that they see as 'normal' - because they don't know any better. Until society changes as a whole and re-adopts traditional values, this lack of respect will continue.

Status is built on respect. Given what I have just said, if you feel that appearance and the way you present yourself improves your status/standing in another person's eyes, then I'm afraid that is a delusion. It may create a favourable impression initially, and obviously I have always looked smart at a job interview (given that usually it is my one and only shot at a job), but in the long-term people can see beyond appearances.

Carry on teaching in slippers! It won't change the respect that I have for teachers - and it won't make a sodding difference to those people who have a lack of respect for others in the first place!

Of course you are right - but if appearance is a way to show respect for others and oneself, than it is IMO part of the game. If I have little respect for myself, others won't respect me. And lacking self-respect (just in my opinion) is sometimes shown in sloppy appearance - not always of course, sometimes it is simply bad taste or not giving a sh.. about other people's opinions (which again COULD be a problem).

And who said that a good appearance covers a bad attitude or bad teaching? It doesn't necessarily exclude each other, nor does a sloppy appearance immediately make someone a bad teacher.
I just tried to say that appearing as a private person whilst teaching (and wearing slippers IMO is private, but it is not only the clothing - this is in fact avery small, yet important detail) doesn't necessarily make it easier for people to see a professional - isn't that what so many teachers are moaning about?

Same with me: I never had problems with any of my teen students - it's exclusively been adults/parents that had/have a bad attitude ...

Similarly here. It's the adults that are the problem. I may be able to diferrentiate my roles, Mother, Wife, Associate Priest's Wife, Housekeeper, Me as a person, Me as a Professional, however other adults have a problem with it. Despite headed paper, comp slips, receipts that always contain my qualifications and good organisational skills. The Studio will help, particularly as we have double-doored it away from the bulk of the house, and the fact that my kids and hubby will be less able to pinch all the pencils and biros from the room!

Why do adults feel that a woman working from home is doing this as a hobby? Mayby I should buy a magazine rack and keep all my ISM Journal's in it!

Therein lies one of my biggest problems! I always look like an idiot with no writing implements - not cos of the husband, as I don't have one of those any more, but the kids use the jar on the piano as their first port of call when they're doing their homework.

I've never had students being disrespectful and I have a rather cluttered bohemian home and tend to wear things like sparkly shoes and somewhat eccentric clothes when teaching at home, and a modified version of the same when teaching in schools. I think it's the way you approach the students and what you expect from them that engenders respect, not how smartly you're dressed or how smart your home is....

I agree!