Once again I seem to have ended up being wlaked over by a parent. I had a lady contact me over 2 months ago wanting to reserve a space for her 2 girls for lessons t the house. As I had someone stopping a couple of weeks ago (6 months notice btw), I said that would be fine. She's put it off twice, as the piano wasn't there, and 2 weeks ago tried to put it off till after Xmas. As I had worked her in to my budget, I said I would prefer she started when we had agreed. I then asked if she wanted to get a couple of recommended books, but she asked me to get them as she was too busy.
The girls and mum duly arrived last Thurs and had there lessons. Unfortunatly I had to have them both in the room at once as I have had problems in the past with 'spare' children running riot round the house while I am teaching. This is not helped by having a 3 year old myself, who welcomes any new playmates with great fervour. Things got off to a bad start when she was disinclined to buy both the books I had ordered, and wanted them both to work out of the same one. I managed to persuade her otherwise, as one girl is 5 and the other is 9.
Second lesson was last night. The lessons went not too bad, but there had been no practice done and mother sat with a bit of a face on throughout. Left them with some work to do over the hols, but not loads obviously.
Today she sent me an email from her work to say that she wanted to cut it down to two 15 min lessons, instead or the 30 mins each. Her reasons - the children are too tired, and her shift pattern has changed and she's on 3 out of 8 Thursdays now instead of 1. She then went on to say that if I couldn't manage this then she would have to stop the lessons for just now.
I can't help but think she would have known this last week. The girls come straight from swimming and she works for NHS 24. She was a little too eager to ensure me she could manage the half hour but not the whole hour. I think she's going to be phoning me later and I don't know what to say. I'm angry that she's kept me hanging on this long, and clearly has no commitment whatsover. 2 lessons they've had, and she expects me to drop either £11.50 or even £23 a week from immediatly after the hols, even though I have a months notice policy. I realise that in her head she thinks that as they are in the room together, they will learn the same things, and why pay for 2 lessons when you can cram it in to one, but the older one is bound to go ahead of the younger at some stage, and there's no way 15 mins would be enough. Anyway I don't do 15min lessons.
Am I being unreasonable?

No! This mother is pulling your leg! 15 minute lessons sound to me like a big fat waste of time.

I would tell her about your notice period and then happily allow her to sling her hook. She sounds like to much hassle in the long term!

No, it's completely understandable. The mother is the problem. I don't do 15 minutes lesson too! I think nobody ever gives a 15 minutes lesson. I would let the students go if the mother only provide me 15 minutes for each. Maybe you could tell her let the 9 year old take the lesson first; or the other way around. Haha..so you got the 30 minutes lesson. Try to explain to the mother about what you are expecting in the lesson, such as teach the rhythm, name the notes, theory, play, etc. It's impossible to squeeze all of them in a short time. Maybe you should notify her that the longer the time, there will be more things you can teach her children.



Hope it's helping.

Ernie

Get rid, immediately! She obviously has no regard at all for the fact that you are a professional person doing a professional job. Life's too short to saddle yourself with problem parents like this!

As others have said, you're being messed about and I would certainly not continue with them. For a start, asking you to get the books for her was out of order, unless you offered to do it first.

Stick to your terms and if she does phone be quite firm about why you don't teach 15 minute lessons.

Don't allow her to dictate to you!

rude people

I think you need to establish if she actually wants them both to learn piano. Similar things to this happened when the girls danced and their teacher always tried to provide what was asked for. It usually ended in her loss' Just sort it out with the parent pull no punches, tell her your terms and that she's got to stick with them. The dance teacher often went down the route of pandering to parents and her school went from thriving to empty in a couple of months. I know this won't happen with Piano because it's not a group learning situation but the dance teacher lost the co-op0erative parents (they were fed up of being messed around) and the demanding ones at around the same time.

That's awful

It's fine to be good at what you do but you need to be able run a business too. That's something I think I'm starting to get the hang of, and this forum has certainly helped me be a bit more assertive when it comes to dealing with problems in that respect!

The Dance Teacher fairly often played parents off against one another so it was always a matter of time before it caught up with her. I don't think it ever does any good though bending to suit this type of parent. We all need to be cut alittle slack at times but why start something that you change after 2 weeks? Doesn't quiter make sense.

Oooooooh this is making me seethe with anger! You should NOT have to deal with this sort of behaviour from a parent, you don't need this and I'd end the lessons. So far you have done nothing but tried to accommodate this woman and her two children, and she is showing nothing but disrespect in return. Lets see her try and find another teacher under these circumstances, and who is being as understanding as you have been up to now. Good Luck to her. And it's the kids I feel sorry for.

End it now I say.

Even more annoyingly she hasn't even phoned me yet. Not everyone checks their emails several times a day.
I have re read the email and she actually says, and I quote,"if it was just for the half hour I would just manage and I also think it would be enough for both of them if I ensure we put the time in at home. Let me know what you think, if not I think we will have to stop just now and revisit later. Sorry to muck you about"

So, she's going to find it too difficult to attend an hours lesson in her packed life, but she's going to put the work in with them at home. I think not.

If I was in your position, I would have to put my foot down and say that a 15 mins lesson for each child is unacceptable. It is not enough time to cover hardly anything at all.

Unfortunately, some parents do not understand that to learn how to play an instrument involves commitment and time. This person does not show any commitment whatsoever and obviously prefers to be rushing around in her busy lifestyle.

Time to say bye bye to that one I think, it is unfair to be messed around like that!!

It could be that she's just chancing her arm - but don't go down the road of the dance teacher and trying to please everybody; it doesn't work. I'd just politely tell her your terms and tell her you want an immediate commitment to them, or you're not prepared to do it. I don't like the idea of having one at the piano and one hanging around either - whether for 15 minutes or 30. When parents have two or more children, then the running around and hanging around is a problem - but it's not your problem.

I'd just politely tell her your terms and tell her you want an immediate commitment to them, or you're not prepared to do it.

I agree. You have kept the lesson-time for her children (as I understand it) during another pupil's notice period. You might have turned down other enquiries during that time who would have liked the space. In other words you have been committed to your original verbal agreement with this mother - now it's time for her to recognise that and offer some commitment of her own.

Totally agree! I'd wait in the car wiht the opposite one in her position or og somewhere else for half an hour or have them on different days. It wouldn't work for us to have one of them sat there whilst the other was playing and I'm sure most siblings owuld find it difficult.

It's not always a problem.
I had a brother and sister aged 14 and 10 who came together and the one waiting would bring something quiet to occupy them. At one time I had both parents and the child with back to back lessons and again they brought books/crosswords/gameboy for when it wasn't their lesson.

Just out of curiosity, since she's taken the cowards way out and emailed me with the promise of a phone call that I'm still waiting on, do you think I should phone her, or wait and let her phone me, and claim I hadn't looked at my emails for days and this is the first I've heard of it. Trouble is it could be long enough before she gets round to phoning at this time of year.

No. Cut your losses and tell her you don't do 15 minute lessons, and look for someone else to fill the slot. This parent sounds like she's going to be nothing but trouble.

Liz

I would certainly tell her that you don't do 15 minute lessons. She will need to pay you for the full hour, and then if she can't / won't stay that long, it's her problem. But they do sound like they are too much trouble.

She still hasn't phoned yet either! Tuts. Thats a week since the lesson now.