As some of you may know I am taking my MA in Music Education in January. Because of timetable clashes with some of my schools and pupils I am having to rejig my timetable a bit.... luckily most parents and pupils are being very supportive and accommodating about this, so I'm very lucky.

HOWEVER, something has happened in the last week - before I even knew about being accepted onto the MA course - that makes me a tad concerned. I'm hoping teachers on this forum can give me some advice? I have been teaching a mother and daughter the Piano for about a year now, and know the family really well. The daughter is in Year 2 in Primary School. The mother wanted lessons so she can support her daughter whilst she is learning, which is brilliant, and we get on really well. But, last week, the mother told me in the lesson that she has to quit lessons for two reasons; firstly she cannot afford them anymore, and secondly she has 2 young children and cannot get enough time to practice, so the lessons are becoming a chore for her. She is genuinely upset as she did really enjoy her lessons before she had financial and time issues, but she just doesn't have the time or the money anymore. Fair enough.

What I am concerned about is the commitment of her daughter. Just to give a bit more info into this situation, I used to live round the corner from this family so it wasn't an issue travelling to them. Since then though I have moved to the other side of South London and getting to them is REALLY difficult (I use public transport). I also teach in Kent on the same day so it takes me an hour and half to get to them. When the mother told me she had a chat with her daughter and explained that she wasn't doing the lessons anymore, the daughter was upset because she clearly sees it as a mother/daughter thing, which it was. She is very young, and she doesn't really practice much as it is to be honest. I know she enjoys her lessons but I have noticed that this is becoming less and less evident as the work gets harder (I know, only natural). I'm concerned that this alongside her mother quitting is going to mean that she quits too.

Pupils sometimes leave, I understand that, but I have 2 issues here. 1. I have to travel for an hour and a half to get to this family now, which used to be for 2 half an hour lessons and now it is only for one. I'm not sure I can afford to do this because I'm now doing an MA and can use the time to research, and I can also fit 2 extra pupils in that timeslot! 2. I have the distinct feeling that the daughter will want to quit after her mother has, and I would rather she do this now than in January when my MA has already started. It will just cause a lot of problems and stress all the way around.

I have known this family since I started teaching, and I don't want to cause any bad blood, but I am at the point that I have to know whether the daughter really wants to carry on or if she wants to quit. With all these factors in mind (travelling, my MA, etc), what do you think I should do? Shall I have a chat to the parents? I have asked them already to pay me the 6 weeks notice fee because the mother wanted to stop lessons immediately, so this is just going to add more confusion isn't it?

Help!

To be honest, I think you should cut your losses and finish with them at the end of this term. It surely isn't worth all that travelling just to teach one half hour lesson, and the family will realise that too. Your circumstances are changing, and you could spend the time doing other things. Why not have a chat with them now and plan some fun activities for a last lesson in the next week or so.

Sad to let go of someone who has been with you from the outset, but this relationship has run it's course.

Firstly, congratulations on starting the MA - I'm sure it'll be an interesting journey!

Secondly, re the pupil - I think that this is an easy one. You haven't got the time. But I understand you don't want to let anyone down. I've had to let go of schools to which I'd become attached, as I've managed to get more teaching at bigger institutions closer to home. I've salved my conscience by, in each case, finding a reliable replacement for me.

So perhaps you can find the name of a reliable teacher or two with a vacancy close to this girl, and then say to the family "I'm really sorry, but I'm not going to be able to carry on teaching you from whenever, due to the demand on my time that the MA will demand. But I know that xxxx has vacancies and would be happy to meet you to see if you can have lessons with him/her."

If that sounds like something you could live with, whatever you do, you must be resolved that you simply will not have the time to teach her (and I guess you won't!) - don't leave yourself open to being persuaded to carry on. You have a completely valid reason to stop now.

Good luck!

Thank you everyone, I'm seeing them tomorrow so will have a word with the parents.

I feel bad because last week I sent them a letter saying I needed 6 weeks notice fees, as they wanted to stop immediately. Now I'm going in there tomorrow saying I want to stop at the end of this term, for the reasons I outlined. So what do I do about the notice fees? The terms and conditions I wrote state 6 weeks from both parties, so that's what I should give isn't it? Unless we can come to some sort of arrangement?

Can't you just waive fees on both sides. The mother owes you 6 weeks because she is giving up and you owe the daughter 6 weeks lessons because you want to stop teaching her. You could argue that the two lots of six weeks cancel each other out.

Well, surely you can compromise by waiving you notice period in return for finishing early yourself.