Oh dear, there seems to have been a bit of an outbreak of dyspepsia. Hope we haven't got 'the Hestons' here... I recommend strong liquor to kill any lingering bugs!

I think you might be right. A large G and T, please, and hold the T.

I need something large and alcoholic, I may only be 16, but I think I need it! I've been asked this evening to fill in as the Celesta player in the Planets by Holst at the last minute for a concert on saturday, and i've just recieved the music! Neptune has so many notes that it makes me dizzy, and they're all extremely quick arpeggios of obscure chords! oh dear!

Jacob.

Here, get this down your neck.. You're going to need it..

Oh dear, you've made me all panicky Jacob. I'll have a scotch with you.

Got any non-alcoholic beer, Sue?

How many days of Lent are there still to go...?

I'm sure we've got some here somewhere.....
Howzat?
We're less than a week into Lent, HG - something tells me its going to be a loooooooong one for you!

Can I have a drink too please?

Less than a week? I thought it was nearly over!

DO keep up, Hovis.


You can have a sneaky tipple in here if you like, I won't tell anyone...

Thankyou, Sue! I think i'll be ok, but if not, I'll be back here on saturday after the concert for 5(+) more of these!

Oooh, scotch, I've never had one of those, I think i'll have one as well!

Jacob.

Cripes, whisky chasers - it must be bad... Steady on there, old chap or you'll be.....argh, too late - *steers Jacob towards couch in corner* - we need a blanket and a bucket over here, please.

oops, sorry! Mixing drinks isn't a good idea, I think I need to go home to bed Goodnight!

Jacob.

Taxi for PFO!

Just time to pop in here for a large cherry tamato salad and a pint of rhubarb wine. Anyone around or can I hog the seat by the log fire?

Hi Ratty,

I'll just move up to make room.

*shuffles along*

Just enjoying a pint of "Brewer's Revenge" real ale, so I might have to go leave quickly. Its powerful stuff.

Mole

*comes in out of the rain*

I'll have a pint please - bit early in the day for me, but I've had a tough morning..

Hi Mole.
This fire is lovely after a walk in the rain. I think that I'll have another pint of rhubarb wine, as my first student is late. I've left a note on my door telling her where to find me. That seemed the professional thing to do.

Hi Sue.
Rhubarb wine?

Mmmm, don't mind if I do, although I have a feeling I'll regret it later. Might cast a rosy glow over my after-school torture session lesson.

Hi Sue,

Yes I think I have some of the Rhubarb wine, too. The Brewer's Revenge is burning the carpet where I spilt it.

My rosy glow was quickly dispelled by the Muppet (Most Useless P__ Plays Everything Terribly)

Gimme a laaaarge gin, gasp!

Deer Teecher,

I've just got home and logged on, only to find that you call me the Muppet...

whinge whinge whinge...

...hearing from my solicitors shortly...

Yours, etc

can i have some gin please?

Can I have something strong please?

Here's a black coffee for you, Sarah! And a G & T for LK!

Slice of lemon in that, LK?

Hmm...coffee...not quite what I had in mind, but thanks anyway HG. It is very strong though

Hello..can I have a medium dry white, please?

Here's a glass of potato wine, DC. Drink it in one. It'll put hairs on your chest!

Lovely...thank you.

Why exactly would Daisy need hairs on her chest???

Dear Muppet,


Make my day!


SueHM

Hey SueHM!

Would proud mum like a pint of whisky?

Thank you! Better make that a half. You didn't take long in A + E. Nice plaster cast - can I be the first to sign it?

Here's a pen.

I could do with a pair of trousers though, after what the ruddy ambulance men did to the last pair. There was no need for them to do it, I'm sure. I noticed one of the old dears passing them a £20 note before they got the scissors out....

Please can I have a drink...?

What would you like Flossy?

I think that hospital gown suits you rather well, actually. William, have you got any spare duds in your locker, mate?

*William rummages and produces voluminous pair of Hawaiian shorts*

Here you go....

*William asks for proof of age....*

We all went to the birthday party a few weeks ago. We know she is 18 In a ghostly voice.

William just asked May and Maddie that too. He just gets bigger tips that way.

I don't have any proof.

I'll vouch for you. Here, have some of my pint while I attract William's attention again - yoo-hoo Wills! Over here sweetie!

*William hides behind a barrel whilst thinking to himself "Oh no! Not HER again"....*

No, here he is now.

Sorry Ratty, I am hard of hearing. William has bigger what????

Hands, May, HANDS dear!

All the better for a massage dear

Are *all* of those drinks for Sue???

Well Helloooo William, is that a corkscrew in your pocket...?

Has anyone seen Fido taday?

He isn't around.


Could we have some chicken curry over here when you've a moment Wills?