Hey

If the only way to salvage the remaining shreds of something was to leave and go to another country, would you do it, if it meant leaving your (great) job, friends and relative stability?

I value the opinions of the people here, so any opinions appreciated. If you want to know the reason I'm asking, could you maybe ask by PM, only it's not really forum-worthy!

Sorry...

(Before anyone asks - no, Matthew and I are not arguing!)

Yep, I'd go. I'm pro-emigration, especially at this kind of age.

It's not really imigration - still in the UK, but thanks.

No. I think I'm more important than that. My sense of self-worth has saved my skin a few times over the years. But that's me.

It would depend on the something.

.

It would all depend on the circumstances....

Are you sure it's the ONLY way or is it more running away?

If you are going TO something all well and good but you can rarely run away from your problems, they tend to follow you until you resolve them.

(All a bit deep I know )

Edit: Can I just add that also the words "last remaining shreds..." tend to imply that the something you are trying to salvage is already very broken and possibly un-salvagable so is it really worth the effort to salvage it??? (Unless it's you dignity/pride or self-esteem of course) Which all goes to show how difficult it is to advise without knowing any details. Sorry.

It's hard to explain - apparently, the only way to make things better *here* is by me leaving. I hope that makes sense...

What does your gut instinct tell you to do?

Do you have a friend up there whom you could stay with for a while, Miss Ross? It seems a pity to leave the area now if you're enjoying your job. After all, in another 6 months you'll be in York anyway.

I'd do it

PM if you get the chance - what's wrong?

There's a lot to be said for going on your instinct, having slept on the matter.

We're not being just a tiny bit melodramatic are we? It seems there's a situation which may require some distance to resolve itself, but is it really necessary to 'leave the country'?? What about just going away for a few weeks, or staying with a friend or something?

Sorry if I'm missing the point or have misconstrued what I've inferred, but making a drama out of a crisis, whilst often very tempting, doesn't always help.

Hope things sort themselves out without the need for a passport...

How would you know that? Whatever the situation Miss Ross finds herself in and the reasons for needing a move, is not for us to judge.

A move away for a while is often the best action to take. I've done it myself when things were getting too much for me a few years back. A change of scenery and making new friends elsewhere might be the tonic you need at the moment, Floss. Can you get to York sooner? You already know people there, and might be able to find a job before heading off to Uni. Once the air is clear at home, you can always go back to visit.

I sincerely hope that your folks don't really think they are best off without you around though. Lots of things are said in anger and frustration. I wish you all the best in whatever you decide to do.

I don't know that, which is why it was a question, not a statement. All I was getting at was that even if it is best for Miss Ross to put some space between herself and whatever the situation in question is, I would suggest it's still possible to do so without leaving the country and her job, etc. (although, again, I don't know).

Even in a fairly small town you don't tend to randomly bump into specific people all that often - an 'ex' of mine lives just a few miles down the road and I've only run into him (not in an SUV, unfortunately) once after nearly six years.

I've already said in my previous post that I might not have inferred things correctly, but I'm only giving advice which is what was originally asked for.

Not melodramactic, no. I was just looking for the easiest way out I think, which is never the right thing to do IMO. I was also rather panick stricken last night, having been issued with an ultimatum from my dad (who never does such things.) But today was a new day.

No, I'm going to stay put and sort things out here rather than running away. I can't leave my family and friends - it would make the last 18 years seem worthless. Thanks for all the advice though.

Good luck! I hope all goes well for you.

See! I nearly asked in my first post if things seemed different now you've slept on them...


Glad to hear it!

Good for you! I hope everything works out for you.

As a Highlander who has lived in Devon for many years I would disagree that movement within the four home countries of the UK was not really immigration.

Good to hear you have come to a decision - times can be hard and often leaving is the easy way out, staying makes you stronger.