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echelon
I have a 10 year old who's learning the viola. He is very enthusiastic and says that he enjoys playing and I fixed up private lessons for him with my viola teacher. However, he also has adhd and finds it difficult to sustain concentration. His academic work at school is very good, so I know that he can do stuff when he wants to. The problem is, that he's only actually playing for about 10 minutes every day sad.gif He whizzes through the pieces that his teacher has given him and perhaps does a couple of scales, then that's it! As a consequence, his progress isn't great and when I try to encourage him he just makes a face and puts his viola away.

Should I be setting some kind of duration for practise each night, or just let him go with the flow? His progress has been much better since I set up the private teacher, but he's just not doing much each day and I think that he should be doing perhaps half an hour. I'm not being pushy, I just don't want him to lose interest because he keeps complaining that he's not to Grade 1 standard yet. I've tried explaining to him that you need to keep playing the same things over until you've perfected them, but he just doesn't seem that bothered. It's like practise is just another chore, but when I ask him if he feels this way, he says not and that he's really enjoying what he does. He would soon let me know if he wasn't interested as he's not shy and always speaks his mind.

What could I do to encourage him to do a little more? Strings aren't easy and he should work a little harder if he wants to get anywhere with it.

I know that some kids do more practise than others, but what would be a reasonable length of time for a 10 year old? I've heard some musicians say that they're glad that their parents made them practise when they were younger otherwise they wouldn't have managed to master their chosen instrument, but I don't want to turn into a nag - like the mother of my schoolfriend who wouldn't let her come out to play with us until she'd done her piano practise each evening. Is learning an instrument work or leisure or a bit of both? I need to get it straight in my mind before I approach this dilemma as I don't want to put out the wrong message to my son.
sbhoa
This is not strings specific but I'd let him go with the 10 minutes for now and maybe see if he'll do a second session if there's time in the day.
Practice isn't always about how long but about how well.
It's possible he will get to the point (with encouragement from his teacher) where he sees for himself that he's not managing to do much with 10 minutes a day.
With those who don't practice for long I prefer to suggest that instead of a time limit they try to set a target.
I discuss possible targets in the lesson..... it might be something like learn 2 bars a day so that you can play them correctly 3 times in a row. I point out that this can take 5 minutes or half an hour depending on how well they concentrate. We also consider the point that if a task is completed very quickly you can extend it if you like. This gives them some ownership of their practice and can lead to more being done than you ask.
echelon
Thank you. Those are good points and your advice is welcomed smile.gif
clarebear
Hi,it is hard to encourage practice without putting kids off completely and falling out with them,my daughter is now 10yrs too but is now doing grade 4 work.She varies with her practice times,sometimes flying through it in about 15 mins (not long enough in my opinion)other times she will be there for about 30mins,never really any longer.She is lucky though because she picks things up quite easily and "gets away with"not doing much practice sometimes.I would recommend about 20-30mins if you can get him to. Otherwise, scales may suffer if he is just running through the pieces.Hope this helps although i am not a teacher so others can probably offer more advice.
notmusimum
QUOTE(sbhoa @ Apr 22 2009, 11:49 AM) *

This is not strings specific but I'd let him go with the 10 minutes for now and maybe see if he'll do a second session if there's time in the day.
Practice isn't always about how long but about how well.
It's possible he will get to the point (with encouragement from his teacher) where he sees for himself that he's not managing to do much with 10 minutes a day.
With those who don't practice for long I prefer to suggest that instead of a time limit they try to set a target.
I discuss possible targets in the lesson..... it might be something like learn 2 bars a day so that you can play them correctly 3 times in a row. I point out that this can take 5 minutes or half an hour depending on how well they concentrate. We also consider the point that if a task is completed very quickly you can extend it if you like. This gives them some ownership of their practice and can lead to more being done than you ask.



Sbhoa raises some excellent points.

When my daughter is stubborn over practice, which she used to be on Piano, I let her Teacher set the targets with her. That way you can provide the encouragement to meet the teacher's targets. She was almost 13 when she started with her current teacher and it's took over a year for him to persuade her/train her to practice properly. Even though she's much better at doing so now it's an ongoing project.

On the plus side your son is getting his instrument out and playing for 10 minutes. It's got to be easier to move fomo this to effective practice than for someone who is not getting the instrument out at all.
Dora
Practice is between 1 hr 45 mins and 2 hours a day for my 12 year old across 3 instruments. My 13 year old does towards an hour a day across 2 instruments.
Things that have worked for us:
A check list to tick. My daughter loves this. She writes out each scale by name and ticks it each day she practices it. She finds playing it 3 times perfectly too hard to self monitor.
Timing herself. My daughter has a stop watch on her watch and she times every practice to the second. She stops it for any break she takes so when she says she has done 43 minutes of practice then that is what she has done.
Learning 2 bars a day. This has just been astonishingly successful for my son but we have tried it before without the same success. I think the reason it has worked this time is partly age and partly that he hasn't done anything else over the last 3 weeks during his practice. He obviously needs to focus very much to learn a new piece in a timely fashion.
Getting very involved in practices. Thankfully my input is less essential now but for a long time I have been required to be chief cheerleader. No need to criticise or anything, just praise was all I did. Calling out scales to play is probably the most boring task but it certainly led to an increase in scale practice.
It is possible to extend this so now I will leave someone to practice but at the end of the practice I'll ask them to show me what they have done. Extends practice and they don't even realise it. No reason not to play for Dad when he comes home or the dog when it wakes up or anyone, grandparents, neighbours, friends have all suffered at my hands. Again no criticism needed. Children have teachers for that. Comments about amazing progress are all that is required.
My husband can't help himself and always used to wade in with criticism. And guess what. He can't read music or play anything. Nuts. Fortunately he knows better now.
Enjoy
Dora


Claudia's Mum
I believe practising every day is the important part, rather than the length of the practice.

My 9 year old does only 10 minutes 3 times a week on piano (grade 4) as this is the hated instrument (not actually enough practice to play the piano proficiently although it gets her through exams - she will give up the moment she has done grade 5!) and about 15-30 minutes on the violin (grade 6 standard) about 5 times a week although on some days she is enjoying herself so much that it can become 45 minutes to an hour. So I let her do what she feels like - 15 minutes is probably the minimum time she needs to get through what the teacher has set if she plays everything through once.

It was only about 10 minutes a day in the earlier grades on the violin.

I often wonder how good she would be if she did a little more practice but I never push her (except minimally on the piano) as I want her to enjoy her music.
maggiemay
I included a paragraph on practice in one of my last term's parents' newsletters.

I agree with Sbhoa that quality is more important than quantity. Here's the paragraph in case it helps ...

Parents sometimes ask …
'How much practice ?'
Little and often is a good rule. A regular few minutes every day is usually much better than infrequent longer sessions. However, a more useful question might be 'what kind of practice? Setting a time can result in unfocused time-filling. Ten minutes of really focused attention, ideally with a target (I will practise that tricky bar until I can't get it wrong; I'll work on the third line until I can play it hands-together) may achieve more than half an hour of simply 'playing through' – which tends to reinforce slips and stumbles. A long practice the night before the lesson after a fallow week is often counter-productive: conversely, the most valuable practice is often the first one after a lesson, when corrections and advice are freshest in the pupil's mind.
all ears
Key issue with us has always been WHEN practice is going to be done - there's a tendency to assume that time will magically make itself available if everything is left to the last minute! So I don't ask how much practice is going to be done, I just ask what times have been mentally assigned to practice, under the guise of needing to know when not to schedule bath-cleaning, homework, or other excitements.

Bit hard to remember, but I think that 10 was an age when the desire to practice in a planned and focused way (rather than just play) was just starting to appear. I've heard the same thing about study - that most kids are 11 before they consistently motivate themselves to do things. Viohazard's violin and Airman's maths certainly took off at about age 11, but I have a feeling girls might mature a bit earlier!
echelon
Thanks for all the replies - it's very helpful to hear of other parent's experiences around this tricky subject.

I have moved the music stand and his viola into the dining room because there's more room and it's a nicer environment - we were practising on the landing outside the bathroom door, so that I could supervise my younger son whilst he had his bath and help my eldest son do his viola practise at the same time, but the landing is only small and fairly miserable. I also have a piano in the dining room, so I can demonstrate different notes to him such as the difference between F and F sharp, which he hasn't grasped yet - it's easier to demonstrate stuff on a piano sometimes I think, so that he can hear and see the differences a little more clearly.

I'm going to try and encourage him to do about 20 minutes each evening and set some small goals for him to achieve. I'll also have a word with his music teacher to try and get her to persuade him to do a little more rather than do a rushed effort each night. I could perhaps split it into two 10 minute parts as well. I know it's more a question of quality rather than quantity, but he he has neither at the moment, so I need to improve something.
Crotchetymum
When my nephew was learning the violin a very long time ago, his teacher said that the instrument should, if possible, be left out, somewhere accessible (though safe, obviously), where he might almost pick it up in passing. His point was that an instrument that looks ready and waiting to be played is more likely to be picked up and played (and voluntary playing, however little, is worth an awful lot) whereas one that's away in its case, or just generally out of sight, might stay there. As the instruments played at the moment in our house are guitars and piano, which are out all the time, I have no idea whether this works or not - would anyone else know?
Misterioso
QUOTE(echelon @ Apr 22 2009, 01:33 PM) *

I'm going to try and encourage him to do about 20 minutes each evening and set some small goals for him to achieve. I'll also have a word with his music teacher to try and get her to persuade him to do a little more rather than do a rushed effort each night. I could perhaps split it into two 10 minute parts as well. I know it's more a question of quality rather than quantity, but he he has neither at the moment, so I need to improve something.

Have you considered small rewards for efficient and / or longer practice sessions? As I said in another thread, my own children had computer / playstation time linked into practice: no practice = no computer / playstation time. But it could be anything that he really enjoys. Hopefully, after a while, he would start to enjoy his practice more because he is playing better, and the whole thing becomes self-perpetuating so that the rewards are no longer needed. Just a thought.
Mad Tom
It astonishes me that a child can reach Grade 5 on piano with 3 practice sessions a week of 10 minutes each.

A boy that is keen on soccer will spend every spare minute - countless hours, practicing Cruyff turns and "keepy-uppy". Young swimmers are expected to turn up at training every week-day morning for anything from 40 minutes to 2 hours or more of intense work in a pool. Young mechanics will spend whole days taking machinery apart and putting it back together, just for the fun of it.

When a child becomes really keen on their instrument the question is not "How can I encourage them to practice more", but "How can I drag them away from it" ! Of course they do not see it as 'practice' or an imposition. It is just a fun way to spend time - more fun than anything else they can imagine doing.

As for rewards, money, treats, gold stars - all have their place, but eventually they must give way to joy in the music itslef, the delight in increasing mastery of the skills - both physical and intellectual, and the satisfaction of entertaining others through performing. One of the skills of a good teacher is engineering the transition from external to intrinsic motivation.

echelon
QUOTE(Mad Tom @ Apr 22 2009, 03:07 PM) *

As for rewards, money, treats, gold stars - all have their place, but eventually they must give way to joy in the music itslef, the delight in increasing mastery of the skills - both physical and intellectual, and the satisfaction of entertaining others through performing. One of the skills of a good teacher is engineering the transition from external to intrinsic motivation.


I agree, but I think that that might come as he gets older and is perhaps involved in the school orchestra or something - he needs something to keep his interest keen and playing with other musicians is a great way of developing that enthusiasm. I guess that some kids are more devoted to their instruments than others.
Clari Nicki1
Echelon,
I have a 10 year old violinist and she does not enjoy practising. She has been playing since she was 6. I remember her telling me she wants to be able to play but doesn't want to have to practise. Learning an instrument has been one way of helping her see that to get good at things, you have to apply effort .
She is also a gymnast and does 14 hours of gym a week- but getting her to do 20 mins a day practice is hard. However, she does realise she has to do it if she wants to get good. She likes the fact she is fairly good at an instrument (she's doing her Gr 4 this term).
I don't time her now. She did have schedules with rewards after 4 weeks of 5 times a week practice which helped her to get into a routine with the violin. Her teacher has shown her how to practise the pieces (little bits at a time), but she will not do scales unless I say 'Scales?' or play the piano with her while she plays!!!!
Madtom, sometimes she doesn't want to go to gym either- but she loves it. It's just hard work too.... and sometimes you just don't want to do hard work!
She finds practicing the piano easier as she doesn't have to get the instrument out.

As a teacher (not of violin!!!) I don't expect my young pupils to do loads of practice every day- 5 -10mins for a beginner, 10- 15 mins a day as you approach Gr 1, 15-20 mins for Gr 2, 20-25 mins etc for Gr 3. The practice just needs to be more focused so they parctise what needs to be practiced.

Good luck echelon !!! I think it's quite common not to love practicing.

anacrusis
Don't worry about this, at this age and level - to some extent you can go with the flow, and yes, the idea of two short sessions in a day will probably reap more rewards than an hour of slog. I'm in two minds about parents being hugely involved in practice - yes, it's good to be supportive, but if parents attempt to become extensions of the teachers, it is likely to go pearshaped once kids hit adolescence, and start to form their own opinions and ideas. I tended to steer clear of the stories so often presented in playgrounds, of the parents whose entire existences revolved around their kids, leaving them no space to develop other than into their parents' predetermined moulds....or not: the stories always seem to be aimed at making others feel hopelessly inadequate - look at how industrious and clever my child is, and what a good job I'm doing of rearing him/her stuff. Comparisons are rarely helpful - one kid can practise ten or fifteen minutes a day and still make good progress, if the practice is of the right kind; another might doodle mindlessly around for half an hour every day and go precisely nowhere. Some kids respond well to tick lists and star charts - my two did not, but enjoyed occasional duetting with one of us.

I know it's a bit off topic, but one thing does bother me about the posts I sometimes see on here - how reluctant to play does a child have to be before its parents will say, okay, enough, you may stop?
BerkshireMum
QUOTE(Crotchetymum @ Apr 22 2009, 02:09 PM) *

When my nephew was learning the violin a very long time ago, his teacher said that the instrument should, if possible, be left out, somewhere accessible (though safe, obviously), where he might almost pick it up in passing. His point was that an instrument that looks ready and waiting to be played is more likely to be picked up and played (and voluntary playing, however little, is worth an awful lot) whereas one that's away in its case, or just generally out of sight, might stay there. As the instruments played at the moment in our house are guitars and piano, which are out all the time, I have no idea whether this works or not - would anyone else know?

When my son started clarinet (aged 9) it was left out most of the time (on a clarinet stand in a quiet corner of the room), because he found putting it together a big disincentive to practice. I did have to encourage him to dry it occasionally, but it doesn't matter too much with the plastic student instruments. It definitely led to more practice in his case, as he'd pick it up for just an odd ten minutes from time to time in addition to his regular practice time.

By the time he'd got keen (at around the age of 12) and got his first wooden clarinet we were past the stage where he needed to leave it out, as his practice time was much longer by then.
Crotchetymum
QUOTE(anacrusis @ Apr 22 2009, 05:32 PM) *

I know it's a bit off topic, but one thing does bother me about the posts I sometimes see on here - how reluctant to play does a child have to be before its parents will say, okay, enough, you may stop?


I stopped nagging my older to son about his jazz piano practice to see how much he did. After a few weeks of no practice at all, I said that he had to practise or give up. He really enjoyed the lessons, but I wasn't going to pay for him to miss school lessons for half an hour so that he could go and have a jolly good natter. He gave up smile.gif


QUOTE(BerkshireMum @ Apr 22 2009, 05:42 PM) *

When my son started clarinet (aged 9) it was left out most of the time (on a clarinet stand in a quiet corner of the room), because he found putting it together a big disincentive to practice. I did have to encourage him to dry it occasionally, but it doesn't matter too much with the plastic student instruments. It definitely led to more practice in his case, as he'd pick it up for just an odd ten minutes from time to time in addition to his regular practice time.

By the time he'd got keen (at around the age of 12) and got his first wooden clarinet we were past the stage where he needed to leave it out, as his practice time was much longer by then.


It would be interesting to know how much those extra 'practices from choice' added to his pleasure in and enthusiasm for the instrument.
BerkshireMum
QUOTE(Crotchetymum @ Apr 22 2009, 07:07 PM) *

QUOTE(BerkshireMum @ Apr 22 2009, 05:42 PM) *

When my son started clarinet (aged 9) it was left out most of the time (on a clarinet stand in a quiet corner of the room), because he found putting it together a big disincentive to practice. I did have to encourage him to dry it occasionally, but it doesn't matter too much with the plastic student instruments. It definitely led to more practice in his case, as he'd pick it up for just an odd ten minutes from time to time in addition to his regular practice time.

By the time he'd got keen (at around the age of 12) and got his first wooden clarinet we were past the stage where he needed to leave it out, as his practice time was much longer by then.


It would be interesting to know how much those extra 'practices from choice' added to his pleasure in and enthusiasm for the instrument.

I suspect they added quite a lot, not least in stamina. When you start on clarinet you can't play for very long, because the lip gets tired, so the regular practice time isn't very long. I'm sure picking it up again later in the day must have helped strengthen the lip, and then made the regular practice times easier.
Dora
QUOTE(anacrusis @ Apr 22 2009, 05:32 PM) *

Don't worry about this, at this age and level - to some extent you can go with the flow, and yes, the idea of two short sessions in a day will probably reap more rewards than an hour of slog. I'm in two minds about parents being hugely involved in practice - yes, it's good to be supportive, but if parents attempt to become extensions of the teachers, it is likely to go pearshaped once kids hit adolescence, and start to form their own opinions and ideas. I tended to steer clear of the stories so often presented in playgrounds, of the parents whose entire existences revolved around their kids, leaving them no space to develop other than into their parents' predetermined moulds....or not: the stories always seem to be aimed at making others feel hopelessly inadequate - look at how industrious and clever my child is, and what a good job I'm doing of rearing him/her stuff. Comparisons are rarely helpful - one kid can practise ten or fifteen minutes a day and still make good progress, if the practice is of the right kind; another might doodle mindlessly around for half an hour every day and go precisely nowhere. Some kids respond well to tick lists and star charts - my two did not, but enjoyed occasional duetting with one of us.

I know it's a bit off topic, but one thing does bother me about the posts I sometimes see on here - how reluctant to play does a child have to be before its parents will say, okay, enough, you may stop?


My son was desperate to take up a third instrument, the violin despite not doing fantastically well on his first two. I was really reluctant to say no so he did it. After a year he had made little progress and it was crystal clear to me that he couldn't manage 3 instruments. I argued with him for weeks and he was adamant that he wanted violin lessons for another year so I made the commitment to them because when it came to it I wasn't willing to stop them in the face of such determination to have lessons. Of course the determination did not translate into practice.
A couple of months later both his other instrument teachers began to protest about lack of progress and I finally persuaded him to call it a day on the violin.
So here no reluctance for lessons and I have to say both mine do practice without any nagging at all.
I think I would do the reasonable thing if they had wanted to give up. When you start you make a commitment for a certain length of time and at the end of that time you review your decision. I'm keen for my children to have outside of school interests and I'm keen for them to try lots of things but I wouldn't insist on anything if they started to say no. Neither of mine are really into sports so I make sure they get exercise in other ways and pretty much leave it at that. I would have been exactly the same with music if they were not keen.
You name it my kids have tried it. They have decided what they want to continue.
In terms of practice I was very involved last year, at my daughter's insistence, but I am hardly involved at all this year. She is getting older and she is getting better at self management of practice. In about 2 years time I really expect to have largely withdrawn from an active part in her musical exploits, except for writing cheques and providing transportation of course.
Dora
burl
We made it clear from the start (at 7) that our son having clarinet lessons involved daily practice. Children are more malleable at that age, and we had a couple of sticker charts with big treats at the end of a month (concerts in London at the Barbican) if he had played every day. This really worked for us, after 2 or 3 months his progress was simply astounding, and he didn't need the charts any more.

As the he progressed through the grades and the music became more intersting, he needed less and less encouragement to practice, and will quite happily run through his orchestra and chamber parts, imagining the rest of the band as an accompaniment.

Now nearly 10, he has strated work on grade 8. He practices 5 days a week, from 7:30 to 8 in the morning, for about half an hour each day, and on Saturdays he has 5 hours of music at the RCM, so he gets Sunday off, except for a monthly NCO regional orchestra practice. During the shorter holidays he tends to keep his music on tickover, playing 2 or 3 times a week, unless he has an exam coming up in which case it is business as usual, but over the summer, he has extra lessons - 10 weeks is too long without guidance and progress.

He tends to find that he misses the clarinet if he is away from it for too long. However, he would cheerfully do away with the piano altogether if given half a chance!

Burl
dolce@piano
I would love an enthusiastic ten year-old who played 10 mins a day !

Unless his teacher in majorly concerned that he's not practising, I would go with the flow - lots of encouragement and maybe 10 will turn into 15 into 20 all by itself, or two times 10 at the weekend or whatever.

Clari Nicki1
QUOTE(Dora @ Apr 22 2009, 11:20 PM) *



I know it's a bit off topic, but one thing does bother me about the posts I sometimes see on here - how reluctant to play does a child have to be before its parents will say, okay, enough, you may stop?



There is a difference between not wanting to have lessons and not wanting to practice. My children have done a fair amount of extra-curricula activities. If they have really wanted to give something up I have let them- but not on a whim. If they do an activity they have to attend it if they can. I won't let them pick and choose. I run cubs and I have a waiting list. One boy only came 4 times last term and it really annoys me as I think there are others on the waiting list who would be better attenders and get more out of it.
If my children say 'I don't want to practice,' I say 'That's ok, but if you don't practise enough we're not paying for lessons'. They usually practise. I meet a lovely mum with a very able musician daughter, who said that she agreed a minimum amount that the girl had to practice and if she didn't do it, the girl had to pay for her lessons that week! She'd done her Gr 8 bassoon at 13 and got distinction and still wasn't enthusiastic about practise as it's hard work.
I encouraged my son to give up the trombone. Getting him to practise was a nightmare and it became a real battle ground. He enjoyed his lessons but he made little progress as he really didn't want to practice. He's good at singing and I am trying to encourage him to keep that up as his teacher is leaving and he doesn't want a new teacher. He only really does singing and scouts. However if he really doesn't want to and stops being prepared to practice then I will let him.
I think there's a balance between encouraging practice and forcing your child to do something they don't want to do.


anacrusis
Good to hear that: I've seen comments like, nobody gives up in our house, and wonder sometimes whether such kids become themselves or something their parents have predetermined for them. We had found that daily practice wasn't quite possible - there were days when the kids were simply too tired or had been out doing other things for too long, such as attending birthday parties or visiting friends for tea: since I don't practise every day either, I didn't feel it reasonable to expect my kids to. They have had the chance to explore music, and have opted to hone skills in other directions. We haven't done the mass of extracurricular activities thing either, and I'm rather relieved about that - thanks to different ages and therefore different groups for the few things they have done, I was at full stretch as a taxi some days even as it was. It does worry me though when parents so totally immerse themselves in their kids that they forget themselves too - I wonder what will happen when their nests are empty? It's one thing to produce well-rounded individuals to replace us in the community: it's another to manage to stay well-rounded in one's own right whilst doing so.

I do agree though that the the deal has to be some work needs putting in - to whatever skill is being developed: it is something we all need to be able to do in adulthood too. I just wonder if families don't suffer somewhat from overload, with everything that is taken on, including three instruments, scouts/guides, swimming, dancing and whatever else is felt necessary.
chickenfingers
Not sure if other parents find the same problem: how to get enough time for them to practise.

Typical day for my 8 yo daughter is this:
0645 wake up 0700 breakfast 0730 off to childminder (both my wife and I work, childminder sends off to school and bring them back after school)
1815 collect from childminder 1830-1900 practice piano (whilst me and wife cook) 1900-2000 Tea/dinner
2000-2030 Shower 2030-2050 violin practice 2050-2115 Homework, reading etc 2115 sleep

I can't possibly squeeze anything more in, and there are people in this forum who feels that as a non musical parent I do not understand how much it takes for a child to succeed in music, as my kids aren't doing enough practice!! I am not underestimating, and she will practise too, if there is more time. Already my child is sleeping late for a child her age; and note no TV nor computer. As she grows older she will need for time for homework, but she will also need more time to practice. I do not know how we will manage.
Fantasia in P major
QUOTE(anacrusis @ Apr 23 2009, 11:05 AM) *

Good to hear that: I've seen comments like, nobody gives up in our house, and wonder sometimes whether such kids become themselves or something their parents have predetermined for them. We had found that daily practice wasn't quite possible - there were days when the kids were simply too tired or had been out doing other things for too long, such as attending birthday parties or visiting friends for tea: since I don't practise every day either, I didn't feel it reasonable to expect my kids to. They have had the chance to explore music, and have opted to hone skills in other directions. We haven't done the mass of extracurricular activities thing either, and I'm rather relieved about that - thanks to different ages and therefore different groups for the few things they have done, I was at full stretch as a taxi some days even as it was. It does worry me though when parents so totally immerse themselves in their kids that they forget themselves too - I wonder what will happen when their nests are empty? It's one thing to produce well-rounded individuals to replace us in the community: it's another to manage to stay well-rounded in one's own right whilst doing so.

I do agree though that the the deal has to be some work needs putting in - to whatever skill is being developed: it is something we all need to be able to do in adulthood too. I just wonder if families don't suffer somewhat from overload, with everything that is taken on, including three instruments, scouts/guides, swimming, dancing and whatever else is felt necessary.



agree.gif

I am a great believer in routine for younger children as they know where they are.

80/20 - My rule of thumb. As long as practise gets done 80% of the time it gives enough room for other things.

Don't we all strive to get the balance between homework, music practise and downtime?

violincjj
QUOTE(chickenfingers @ Apr 23 2009, 11:21 AM) *

Not sure if other parents find the same problem: how to get enough time for them to practise.

Typical day for my 8 yo daughter is this:
0645 wake up 0700 breakfast 0730 off to childminder (both my wife and I work, childminder sends off to school and bring them back after school)
1815 collect from childminder 1830-1900 practice piano (whilst me and wife cook) 1900-2000 Tea/dinner
2000-2030 Shower 2030-2050 violin practice 2050-2115 Homework, reading etc 2115 sleep

I can't possibly squeeze anything more in, and there are people in this forum who feels that as a non musical parent I do not understand how much it takes for a child to succeed in music, as my kids aren't doing enough practice!! I am not underestimating, and she will practise too, if there is more time. Already my child is sleeping late for a child her age; and note no TV nor computer. As she grows older she will need for time for homework, but she will also need more time to practice. I do not know how we will manage.



You could spend less than an hour eating dinner?
Dora
QUOTE(violincjj @ Apr 26 2009, 06:49 AM) *

QUOTE(chickenfingers @ Apr 23 2009, 11:21 AM) *

Not sure if other parents find the same problem: how to get enough time for them to practise.

Typical day for my 8 yo daughter is this:
0645 wake up 0700 breakfast 0730 off to childminder (both my wife and I work, childminder sends off to school and bring them back after school)
1815 collect from childminder 1830-1900 practice piano (whilst me and wife cook) 1900-2000 Tea/dinner
2000-2030 Shower 2030-2050 violin practice 2050-2115 Homework, reading etc 2115 sleep

I can't possibly squeeze anything more in, and there are people in this forum who feels that as a non musical parent I do not understand how much it takes for a child to succeed in music, as my kids aren't doing enough practice!! I am not underestimating, and she will practise too, if there is more time. Already my child is sleeping late for a child her age; and note no TV nor computer. As she grows older she will need for time for homework, but she will also need more time to practice. I do not know how we will manage.



You could spend less than an hour eating dinner?


The bigger problem with this schedule is the time spent at the childminders. My children have nearly a 3 hour shorter, out of the house day than this child unless they stay at school for a musical activity. Is it possible for her to do homework at the childminders and thus get to bed before 9.00 which really is a very late bedtime for many 8 year olds. How do things like Brownies, swimming or piano lessons fit into this schedule?
Things might actually ease as your child gets older and is able to come straight home from school and let themselves into the house alone. They will then have a large, hopefully, window to do homework and practice in.
Dora
violincjj


Oooh maybe I should be a Practise Supervising Childminder...that might be fun!
all ears
Chickenfingers, I know EXACTLY what you are saying!

I know kids who started aural/solfege and piano almost as early as they started violin, and they are doing HOURS of violin practice every day before they even turn 10, in addition to a lighter piano schedule. In almost every case I can think of, these are only children from well-off homes where the mother does not work, look after elderly relatives, or have much involvement in PTA or other community efforts. Mother simply spends almost all of the time her child is not in school encouraging or assisting with violin practice.

It doesn't matter how ideal such a schedule might be - it just isn't possible for many of us. I used to literally worry myself sick, with half of my acquaintances telling me I was blighting child's future through lack of sufficient practice and supplementary lessons, while the other half told me I was blighting the child's future though excessive hothousing.

So one day I stopped worrying...in the end it's my son's future, not mine, and he will pick up on whatever we have been able to provide him with, and do his best with it (or not).

As your child grows, it may be possible to move some of the practice time to early morning - that works well for us, and I think is healthier.

If it's any consolation, quite small children go to bed at 9 pm in Japan ( 9 pm is considered kids' bedtime from kindergarten throughout elementary school, in fact). Not only does each kid have slightly different needs (I have one kid who needs plenty of sleep, and one who thinks sleeping is for mugs), but I could swear that adequate sleep doubles the effectiveness of time spent practicing (or studying for that matter).

I'm against cutting down on mealtimes (and bedtime story time) for a busy family, as these are invaluable chances to hear and see what's going on with our kids. Nobody says much when invited to "talk about the day", it's when other things are going on that little clues slip out.

Also, actual practice is not the only time when musical education is going on - what's listened to at home, what's heard incidentally through the day, and what's discussed are all big influences.

And finally, at least in the UK you have some chances to do music through school, and maybe free periods at high school that can be used for practice...so try not to worry that the time squeeze will only get worse...there will be changes, but some will be good!

QUOTE
80/20 - My rule of thumb. As long as practise gets done 80% of the time it gives enough room for other things.


Excellent idea - it helps if kids know when practice is going to happen, so that time isn't wasted negotiating it every single day, but I often try to arrange early bedtime or later rising time one day midweek.

Dora - I did actually stop one son's violin lessons, because while Viohazard might moan about starting practice, he would get the bit between his teeth once he started and be hard to stop, while Airman moaned the whole way through. Although he complained about lessons being stopped, he has not tried to continue independently since then. He has become very involved with other interests...so while I think music might have been more successful if I had managed it better, I don't think that stopping lessons has left a gaping hole in his life.
Dora


Dora - I did actually stop one son's violin lessons, because while Viohazard might moan about starting practice, he would get the bit between his teeth once he started and be hard to stop, while Airman moaned the whole way through. Although he complained about lessons being stopped, he has not tried to continue independently since then. He has become very involved with other interests...so while I think music might have been more successful if I had managed it better, I don't think that stopping lessons has left a gaping hole in his life.
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Jamie hasn't missed the violin at all. He hasn't got it out once in the last 6/7 months. And his progress on his other two instruments has been much improved since he gave it up. It was the right decision. Now I need to get rid of a 3/4 student violin.
Dora

QUOTE(violincjj @ Apr 26 2009, 09:03 AM) *

Oooh maybe I should be a Practise Supervising Childminder...that might be fun!


I suspect you'd be popular but I should think it is very difficult to get one child to practice while others are playing if you are a childminder.
Dora
LooneyTunes
QUOTE(Mad Tom @ Apr 22 2009, 03:07 PM) *

When a child becomes really keen on their instrument the question is not "How can I encourage them to practice more", but "How can I drag them away from it" ! Of course they do not see it as 'practice' or an imposition. It is just a fun way to spend time - more fun than anything else they can imagine doing.

As for rewards, money, treats, gold stars - all have their place, but eventually they must give way to joy in the music itslef, the delight in increasing mastery of the skills - both physical and intellectual, and the satisfaction of entertaining others through performing. One of the skills of a good teacher is engineering the transition from external to intrinsic motivation.

Wise words, as always!

My (just) 9 year old has lessons in piano and violin. Given that she practises sporadically (usually the day before the lesson - in a good week one or two additional sessions), she has, through gentle nagging, managed to pass grade 2 piano and grade 4 violin. As her violin teacher remarked, if she practised more she could be a really good violinist.

I'm passionate about music. I've chosen to take up the piano and violin (from scratch) as an adult learner. I know how much time and effort is required to reach a high standard - and I struggle to give the time that is required to make noticeable progression at my current level. Too many work deadlines.....

I don't see the same passion (yet) in my daughter. It may come, it may not. She wishes to continue with lessons at the moment but a time may come when she decides to stop. I'm fully aware of the additional pressures she'll have when she starts senior school.

My intention is to set a sound musical foundation for her whilst she's still young (and flexible!). Music is a part of her life, not her whole life. She has enough on besides musical activities, having recently been chosen to represent the region in chess (lovely weekends away!), climbing and ballet (she gave up horse-riding thankfully!) and I don't feel I can push her any harder - she needs time to relax! She enjoys her music lessons, and I'm lucky to have found understanding teachers who appreciate the demands of 'modern' parenting.

My 5 year old has now started on her musical journey..... ph34r.gif It may be an easier ride with this one - she's already telling me to go away when she practises! laugh.gif

At the end of the day, as others have said, as parents we strive to bring up well-rounded, well-adjusted individuals. We provide what opportunities we can within time and financial constraints. We shouldn't make comparisons with others because the dynamics within families are very different; what works for one doesn't work for another. It would be lovely to have some sort of daily practice schedule but that needs to be motivated from the child otherwise there's a risk of it becoming a 'chore'.

echelon
Crikey, we have had a bit of a breakthrough!

My son practised for 30 minutes today - no nagging, no prompts - he actually enjoyed it and I could hear him playing the same two bars over and over in order to correct a mistake that he had been making. I can't believe it! He was happy to be doing it and he demonstrated to himself that a bit of work does improve his playing.

He's not quite ready for his Grade 1, but when I mentioned him doing a Prep Test the other day he jumped at the chance, so his teacher has entered him. He's getting excited at the prospect of having a certificate to hang on the wall and he's starting to take some pride in his playing!

What a difference a week makes! Perhaps my moving the music to the dining room has had some magical effect!
Flossie
QUOTE(echelon @ May 9 2009, 09:13 PM) *

Crikey, we have had a bit of a breakthrough!

My son practised for 30 minutes today - no nagging, no prompts - he actually enjoyed it and I could hear him playing the same two bars over and over in order to correct a mistake that he had been making. I can't believe it! He was happy to be doing it and he demonstrated to himself that a bit of work does improve his playing.

He's not quite ready for his Grade 1, but when I mentioned him doing a Prep Test the other day he jumped at the chance, so his teacher has entered him. He's getting excited at the prospect of having a certificate to hang on the wall and he's starting to take some pride in his playing!

What a difference a week makes! Perhaps my moving the music to the dining room has had some magical effect!

yay.gif Hope the progress continues. smile.gif

Having the prep test to work for may be just the inspiration he needs. smile.gif
Dora
QUOTE(echelon @ May 9 2009, 09:13 PM) *

Crikey, we have had a bit of a breakthrough!

My son practised for 30 minutes today - no nagging, no prompts - he actually enjoyed it and I could hear him playing the same two bars over and over in order to correct a mistake that he had been making. I can't believe it! He was happy to be doing it and he demonstrated to himself that a bit of work does improve his playing.

He's not quite ready for his Grade 1, but when I mentioned him doing a Prep Test the other day he jumped at the chance, so his teacher has entered him. He's getting excited at the prospect of having a certificate to hang on the wall and he's starting to take some pride in his playing!

What a difference a week makes! Perhaps my moving the music to the dining room has had some magical effect!

That is so cool. My son, 13 has only just begun to appreciate the purpose of practice.
Good luck with the Prep test.
Dora
echelon
Thank you. I'll let you know how it goes.
The Boyz Mum
#1 son - aged 12 no longer really practices, but now now he's playing in a local orchestra I'm not too bothered as he is still getting about 3 hours a week - and as he says music is not his passion!!!

#2 - who is due to do his G5 this session does about 15-20 minutes of scales every morning before school and then about 1-1.5 hours a day - plus 2 lessons and 3 hours of orchestra every week. Hey as long as he's still enjoying it we don't mind - its lovely listening to him - even the scales:P
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