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That sounds rather annoying, personally, I wouldn't bother with them any more, i think you said the other 11 babysitters had left due to coming into full time employment? That sounds somewhat unbelievable, I wonder if they left because of being given the run around....

I wouldn't think about the little girl, and i know its heartless, but that is irrelevent, if they aren't going to stick to the contract, and what was agreed on, then tough, they will have to help their daughter deal with it.

And with regards to the apple fiasco, surely there is more stuff in the spray that there would be pesticides... why dont they just buy organic apples. :confused:

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You do not want to be working for anyone that peculiar! If they are that weird at the point at which they are trying to persuade you to take the job they will be a complete nightmare later on. Run while you can. The problem with that sort of set up (and I did a bit of similar work during holidays from Uni, but through an agency) is that they see you as servant. The one family I worked for we all ate together and then one Sunday they announced they had friends coming for lunch. They spent all morning cooking roast beef, and then just as they were about to serve turned to me and asked what I was going to get for myself once they had sat down. I wouldn't have minded having my meal separately, but they didn't even offer me a slice of the beef on a tray. I ended up with a boiled egg because there was nothing else to eat.

That hardly sounds fair! Seen this sort of thing on TV!! Some people just want blood for nothing.

Take care in this situation Melody Armour. Do you really want this job???? Why not leave little girl to no. 13. Then YOU won't be letting her downas you would perhaps feel if it gets unbearable after you'd started.

Walk away - you don't need the hassle.

And breathe!

My goodness. I think there are just a few too many things there to put up with, particularly when you'd think they'd be trying to make a good impression at this stage. Perhaps if they were paying you £99 an hour...

Argh. Sounds a nightmare situation...personally, I would cut my losses and not go back...

I wouldn't

Thanks so much everyone for answering. I didn't sleep particularly well last night. I am going to ring these people and say that I cannot keep a space open for them until January. To be honest, mother is so against having a contract that it probably comes down to me wanting to say I don't want them before they say they don't want me after all.

Good luck

Just a thought, not that it should change your mind at all, but is the mother so fanaticalbecause the child has some serious health issues - allergies etc at all???? or a compromised immune system....

Still sounds all too bizarre to put up with though.

For a whole host of reasons too numerous to post, I'd walk away from this Melody Amour. You are doing the right thing, in my opinion.

And another vote for the 'walk away' club. What sort of family employs 12 different baby-sitters? There are so many alarm bells ringing about this set-up - they are going to be a nightmare to work for. Stick to your guns with any future clients as well - why would anyone object to a reasonable contract? After all contracts are there for the protection of both parties.

If the child had a compromised immune system or serious allergies, would a responsible family really be happy to leave her with any one of 12 different sitters? I think they are just bizarre and trying to take whatever they can get from you. D-o-n'-t g-o b-a-c-k!!

I agree 100% with the other posters, I would also be concerned what the kids are like, as it wouldn't surprised me if they played you up to get back at the parents and unless you are hired to be a behavioural supernanny, it wouldn't be very comfortable.

It's the parents' responsibility, not yours, to worry about the effects that 12 babysitters may be having on their little girl. If the mother said that they "have" (not "had") 11 other babysitters, I would take that as meaning that they have a pool of babysitters, so that if one isn't available, they can call upon another one.

Why do your friends think you should keep going? They presumably know you better than we do on here, and know more about your circumstances.




I don't know what I would do, so I'll put forward some pros and cons...

In favour of continuing:

- This is business, not personal. It helps if you like your clients but if you're only going to do business with people you like, you're restricting the amount of business that you take on.

- When you first start a business, it's not uncommon to have to take whatever business comes your way until you get more established.

- Taking this business may lead to more business. For instance, you may be called upon to pick the child up from school/nursery one day (I'm not sure how old she is), which would enable you to meet other parents who may be interested in your services. Don't expect this mother to recommend you to her friends though - she's more likely to want to keep you available for herself.

- If there's the possibility of earning £300 a month from this business, that's not to be thrown away lightly.

- This may well be the first of many difficult clients. Learning how to deal with them and accommodate their personal idiosyncracies is all part of building up experience.

- What's the little girl like? Most of the time you'll be with her, not the parents. Is it worth putting up with the parents for the sake of a pleasurable time with the child?


Against continuing:

- They've bothered you quite a lot. If clients get to the stage where they drain your energy or sap your confidence, it's better that they go.

- Time spent with this family could be better employed on other business.


The fact that I've put more individual points in favour of continuing than against doesn't mean that I think you should continue - only you can decide whether your stress level in dealing with them outweighs all the other factors.

As far as the contract goes, I wouldn't do business without a contract either, although having said that, I can understand their reluctance in this instance because I think it's unusual for babysitters to have a contract. But nevertheless, if you're running this as a business, that's what you need to do. But contracts don't have to be set in stone - it's not uncommon for individual contracts to be negotiated. By using some creative thinking, and if you want to continue subject to contract, could you tailor a contract which both you and they would find acceptable?

Best of luck with your business, whatever you decide to do. And if you decide to carry on, at least for a short period, make sure that they agree in writing to replace your shoes if they go missing and to pay for a taxi home if you have to make your way home without them!

I don't know whether this is just a temporary job for you or something you're looking at more permanently, and I also know nothing about the baby sitting "business" but I presume it's pretty much like any other service. So, for what it's worth...

I have been self-employed for all of my working life and my approach would be to:

First ask myself if I really need this client (financially). The answer to that is probably fairly obvious, and if it's "yes" then the decision will make itself, until you can find someone you'd rather work with.

If not, then just say no. Being able to do this and not even having to justify it is one of the few advantages/pleasures of being self-employed!!!

I've always adopted the approach that if you know you're own bottom line, i.e. the point beyond which you're not prepared to go, before you start negotiations, discussions, etc. then things become much easier and more relaxed. So, even if a written contract is not absolutely necessary (as I said I don't know the sector*) but drawing up your own conditions on paper and then at least having them in your head sounds like a good idea (and also communicating them to would-be clients, of course).

I repeat, having the possibility of choosing whom you work with is one of the few advantages of being self-employed, so there's not really any point in taking on a whole lot of unnecessary constraints (and these people do sound frankly weird).



(sounds funny talking about baby sitting like that but, as I said, I presume it's no different from other services in terms of commercial arrangements))

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I'm glad you've resolved it and that you no longer have to have anything to do with this woman - she does sound like Big Trouble, and sometimes clients just aren't worth having because of the stress they cause. Good luck finding better people to do business with - they are out there somewhere!

This is the thing that would worry me too. It seems this mother is not really prepared for "life" to happen to her child. We all want to look after our little ones, but we do not all behave as she has done.

I agree with everyone else and think you've done the right thing.

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I'm glad everything has come together for you.

Me too.

Just saw this thread.. the first family reminded me of the book 'The Nanny Diaries'... if youi've not heard of it, find it and read it.... it will sounds scarily familiar!!!

So glad for you that you extracted yourself from the situation of family #1... the 2nd family sound lovely.
And being musical a real added bonus

Oof, I'd say you were well out of that one....
Chaos and control-freakery all at the same time, not a good combination. And now, to have a musical family to help out instead, with parents who can understand that the world does not rotate around them - a far better bet. I'm also pleased for you that you do have a contract sorted out ahead of time - in a situation like that it almost certainly rescued you from what would have been the worst sort of "on call" job, what a relief!


Enjoy the job you found instead, and I hope more in a similar vein can come your way as and when you need it .