It's time for the chaps out there who commonly end their text messages to chums with an affectionate "x" to come out of the closet - because demonstrating your "metrotextuality" is apparently nothing to be ashamed of.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/11/04/metrotextuals/

I must admit I do this sometimes with close friends, usually of the female variety. However, whenever I accidentally append one to a text to one of the lads, I usually get an amusing reply like "Love you too, honey" or a bemused, "what the *&@! was the x for?!"

My best mate sometimes literally adds a few dozen to virtually every message she sends, which I find a bit annoying but I suppose as she's a girl, it's forgivable! I'm sure half the time it must take her into a 2nd SMS when only one was required!

What do others think?

I don't know if this applies to me, given that I am of the female variety, but I have guy friends who end their texts with an 'x' when texting me - whether or not they do it to their guy friends I don't know! And anyway, is it so wrong for boys and men to show a little affection to each other?! Girls do it all the time and it isn't considered weird in any way!

That normally only happens after several pints, though... picture a guy giving his friend a hug and slurring:

"I love you I do..*hic*... yer me besht mate...*hic*...you're great you are!"

This I have seen But it'd be nice if you lads showed each other a little affection without it being considered mild taboo. I suppose I can understand the 'x' thing, because that would essentially mean giving your guy friend a kiss, but as I said, girls do it all the time.

I routinely sign off texts to friends with x (usually just one). Several years ago I realised just before my boss was due to go into an important meeting on the other side of the town that there was an error in some of the figures I'd provided him with so quickly texted him to warn him, I so nearly added the "x" but stopped myself just in time - he can appear quite strait-laced and I didn't know him very well at the time. I would have been more embarassed by the x than I would have been by the error in the figures.

Call him 'sweetheart' for good measure

Could work wonders for promotion prospects!

I see the point though, to the wrong person, it could easily be misunderstood!

What's a "text"?











Only joking -I'm not quite that old!

It's very common for guys over here to say things like 'je t'embrasse' (I kiss you) to each other and the end of phone conversations, or to end text messages with 'gros bisous' (big kisses) - they don't appear to have hang ups about being affectionate to one another at all. Perhaps this comes from the language only having one verb for 'like' and 'love'. Who knows?

The x symbol doesn't mean anything over here though - it would be so much quicker to text if it did! On the rare occasions I've mistakenly used it (ten years in England will do that to you) - people say things like 'was there a missing word at the end of your text?'...

I do the x at the end of texts, PMs and such like, and have on occasion done it out of habit to people I don't know very well.

Being half-French with half of my family in France I can definitely vouch for that - when we go over, family and friends greet each other with kisses (it does get quite tedious when you're at a big gathering and you have to greet thirty people in that way - it gives me an awful crick in my neck!). The guys aren't worried about it.

Stephie, I know exactly what you mean! I always try not to be the last person to arrive at any party we go to - it takes ages and you have to try to kiss everyone and remember their name!

Much easier to be one of those who is kissed by the newcomers rather than being the person who has to kiss thirty people all together!

My best male friend has a system. Girls like me, and the couple of girls who are like sisters to him, who he's known his whole life get no kisses. Girls he's "just friends" with and not particularly attracted to get one because "maybe one day I'll change my mind", girls he fancies get two, and girlfriends get about six million. I imagine he doesn't send any to his guy friends, though.

I always send two (that have to look like this: "Xx") to just about everyone. Sometimes I refrain if I think the recipient could take it badly, but honestly now it's automatic, my fingers just go to those buttons naturally when I've finished a text. I suppose it's different for girls though.

What I'm finding interesting about this thread is that, inspite of our constant demands for equality, we're all quite old fashioned at the bottom of us and really believe that rules are different for boys and girls. We're a funny lot!

I'm in favour of pure equality - everyone treated the same - no special treatment or considerations because someone happens to be male or female, and certainly no discrimination either.

If someone wants to put kisses at the end of a text, I can't see that it should matter whether that person is female or not - I'm going to put loads of kisses right at the end of this message now and shall finish all my texts thus for the rest of the day.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Doesn't it rather devalue the currency if EVERYONE gets one? What do you do for people you actually like?

Thats why I cringe a bit when I overhear phone conversations about a shopping list or something and it finishes with "...love you!"

Ah that's a different question - I agree that it's over used. My issue is with people saying 'it's ok for her to do it - she's a girl' - so what?!

Definitely Plus, if they're from different parts of France, then they'll go for a different number of kisses, which can be confusing Embarrassing too, if you go in for a third and fourth and they're all like, 'No it's just two'...

I think blokes just don't know what they can and can't do nowadays what with all the conflicting views and the amount of effeminate men in the media! Just look at Cristiano Ronaldo... Oh Lordy!

Indeed! Vive la difference, I say

I usually add an X for Wife, Daughter, Mother in Law, Daughter in Law, and Sister. Oh! and maybe just one forumite ! No males at all including my son.

I would seriously recommend never to work in a theatre (or in fact most artistic environments) then - the lines about what is regarded 'feminine' and 'masculine' are sometimes very blurred in both a behavioural and s'exual context (although one doesn't necessarily have to do with the other), and I sometimes think it's not the worst to be totally honest.
Men being 'effeminate' is something that many people (mainly guys) still seem to react negatively on - what about women who our ancestors certainly would have called mannish? Not because they look like men (very much the opposite sometimes), but more because they do what was solely regarded as 'male stuff': being the main provider, working all day, not staying at home with the kids etc.

I like and dislike a lot of men of both the butch and rather 'womanish' kind (which again has not necessarily to do with s'exual orientation btw), and I think that the westernised concept of 'male identity' is something that you e.g. won't find that way in other cultures. It's all very relative ...

I don't like the 'xxx' very much, but I don't mind if they are used by men or women - if overused, they are ridiculous either way. An occasional one is fine though, and I use them here and there myself.
I also don't mind the cheek-kisses, although we don't do them in the 'normal German world' (we are passionate 'handshakers' ).
They are used in German theatres though, and most blokes use them as well to greet each other, no matter if they prefer girls or boys

Women being the main income provider etc is fine, I wouldn't say that's "mannish". I cringe at "laddish" behaviour though, ie: when they start downing pints of lager in 3 seconds flat.

I've been to a few parties where arty types have been there and can't say that effeminate/camp guys really bother me at all unless they are ridiculously over the top with it.

Fact is that a lot of guys are not comfortable with outwardly making their feelings known, so it just seems odd when a minority do that! Whether it's a genetic or culturally ingrained thing, I don't know

There really needs to be a character that depicts "bloke punching mate on arm, in a matey way" instead of an X.

I wonder if anyone else saw the youtube clip showing 2 boxers about to get started and standing face to face listening to the referee giving his talk.

Boxer 2 gives boxer 1 a quick kiss on the lips.
Next instant boxer 2 is flat on the canvas, out cold - boxer 1 had clearly taken offence before the match had even begun.

Who is going to take boxer 1 aside to remonstrate? You could always send him a text...

Any chance of a link?

try this
www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZv9qlu3dJ0

Hope its the right one... hey! it doesn't work as a link - don't know why not.

You need to put [url] and [/url] tags around it

Awesome! That's hilarious! Wonder if it's staged, though?

That's questionable and vulgar behaviour even in men, though - I can't say I've ever thought 'wow, he's so cool, he can drink really fast and then fight in the gutter after eleven pints which he hasn't even tasted - I wish I were him'...

I was about to say that I don't think anybody would, but I'm sure there are plenty! It's silly behaviour...

I've seen a woman in a pub in the city absolutely demolish the male competition in a drinking contest. I stood there in stark amazement

I find ladettes with no decorum a massive turn-off. I'm not sure who it is they are trying to impress, but I assume most likely their similarly feral male counterparts.

There's having a laugh and enjoying yourself, and then there's taking it way too far. It seems to be socially acceptable for girls to act like blokes nowadays though...

Pass me the DOOOOM BAR barrel and a straw

LOL! And there was me thinking you were most civilised!

It's those damn suffragettes! Kidding... I admire the suffragettes very much.