Hi friends,
I have a boy of 7 who's quite stubborn and restless, gives me real headaches each time I taught him the piano. I take him out of pity because the mother insists I be his piano teacher. The mother knows the son and how troublesome he is but insists he must learn the piano. Now I'm facing real challenges of teaching rythm and simple melodies but he frustrates me a lot. Pls advice me on how to make this child better so that the mum gets value for her money. I really wish to see him get better but most times I get discouraged and I think its not ideal for a good teacher to drop students. I only studied piano as a performer not teaching but if I fail to help, then I'm seen as a half musician.

Try fitting words to the tricky rhythms, getting him to say the words, then clap them as he says the words and finally play them.

You can do your best as a teacher, but a difficult 7 year old may just not be ready for lessons yet. I would suggest you try for a while but be prepared to suggest a break until he is older if you are really not getting anywhere.

First of all - you are not only half a musician, because you don't have a miracle cure for a stubborn little boy who from what it sounds from your post, is made to come to piano lessons by his Mum.

Secondly, I think the child psychology part of our job comes as a shock to all of us when we are first faced with the reality of a real live child who doesn't want to do it.

You need to approach this in two ways firstly be honest with the Mum, say that you are happy to continue, but if he digs his heels in and really doesn't want to learn, or practise(?) she will need to accept that she will not get full value for money, and where possible give her regular updates as to what you are trying to achieve. Support from home is half the battle.

The second way is to limit the amount of time in the lesson that you are doing solid technical work, if he is being stubborn and won't concentrate to learn a melody, or a rhythm. Play games with him around that rhythm, often with youngsters marching around the room and making up different rhythms on the piano can spark their imagination where sitting at the instrument looking at the book will not. Ultimately you will need to cover the theory on the book, but a little each week until he matures enough to sit down and concentrate properly.

I would also add that a good teacher knows if dropping a student is the right thing to do - at both ends of the learning process, but above all be honest with the bill payer. If you don't think it's for him, say so and let them make up their decision. In a similar way students can outgrow their teacher and need to travel and move on if they are to advance.

Good luck - don't give up D x

You describe a situation here which I would not tolerate : a child who does not wish to have piano lessons and only does so because Mum insists. When I start young children off I always ask parents if their child WANTS to
play the piano or if it is only the parents who want the child to play. By meeting BOTH parent(s) and child beforehand I have to satisfy myself that it is the CHILD who wishes to play. If it is clear to me that the child doesn't then I do not accept the pupil.
If I DID have your situation I would discontinue the lessons which is not admitting defeat but possibly avoiding the child's alienation from and aversion to music for the rest of his life. He may later grow to like it and really wish to play then.

I feel pretty strongly about the potential for aversion to music.

I didn't read it quite like this - I'm not sure that this child actively doesn't want to learn, just that he's being awkward and not concentrating well. I'm also going to take a punt and guess that the OP is writing from somewhere in Asia and that his or her expectations of a seven-year-old child might be slightly different.

So I think it's important to remember that this child is very young and to offer a variety of fun musical activities, changing them frequently to keep his attention. On the other hand, if the child really doesn't want learn, then it would probably be better to stop lessons, at least until he is older.

Does the mother sit in on the lessons? I pretty well insist on a parent being present when I teach this age group, and I expect the parent to intervene if the child is refusing to listen or to do a certain activity. My role is to teach piano, not to be constantly calling the child to order.