Have any? I have a few favorite: 1. so, how many fingers do you use?
2.what is your favorite piece?
3.why would you need to practice every day?!?
4.How can you be looking at your instrument and the music at the same time? (and here are all the conductors yelling at me; LOOK AT THE STICK!!!!!!!)

why do you like music, its sooo gay!!!

thats one i often get! and

why do you spend your free time practising...do something better! ..erm NO!!!

and they find it amazing that i dont need to look at the piano to play the notes!

And then you get the people who say 'oh I wish I could play an instrument' but do nothing about it.

"wot do u want to play the sax for its soooooooo gay why dont you play the guitar or the drums?" BECAUSE I DONT WANT TO OK!!!!!

ha i like that one uberzoldat i hear a lot of people say that

Doesn't it just drive you up the wall? ("oh, sniff sniff, I could never do that") well TRY!

I dunno about annoying questions from The Ignorant, but I DO remember my (EX) cleaning lady saying to me one day "You must have such a nice life. I mean, it's not like you have a PROPER job - all you do is blow and move your fingers". Said ex-cleaning lady ended up in A & E having my Hoover surgically removed from her person. Bah.

"The clarinet, is that like the flute?" NO! "Is it like a recorder?" No......wait, yes, it's like a big recorder

"What's in the briefcase? (My clarinet case)" Something heavy that's going to make contact with your head in a few seconds

Like when they stare at you when you say you actually LIKE the harpsichord....and say WHAT THE HECK IS THAT??????

QUOTE (Bagpuss @ May 3 2005, 05:06 PM)

I dunno about annoying questions from The Ignorant, but I DO remember my (EX) cleaning lady saying to me one day "You must have such a nice life. I mean, it's not like you have a PROPER job - all you do is blow and move your fingers". Said ex-cleaning lady ended up in A & E having my Hoover surgically removed from her person. Bah.

Your hoover was surgically removed from where?
Wonder how that one slipped the eagle-eyed Madame Moderator... ho hum

QUOTE (Saxophonist @ May 3 2005, 08:43 PM)

"wot do u want to play the sax for its soooooooo gay why dont you play the guitar or the drums?"

I get stupid similar stuff like that.

my flute is being discriminated!

I also get:

1) What's the point of taking music?
2) How can you read those notes?
3) Hw do you play the instrument?

and the statement I always get: 'TEACH ME!'

and I hate non-music people touching my instruments! they always handle my flute like a piece of stick T_T

QUOTE (Bagpuss @ May 3 2005, 10:06 PM)

I dunno about annoying questions from The Ignorant, but I DO remember my (EX) cleaning lady saying to me one day "You must have such a nice life. I mean, it's not like you have a PROPER job - all you do is blow and move your fingers". Said ex-cleaning lady ended up in A & E having my Hoover surgically removed from her person. Bah.

Also:

"Do you know all the conductors signs?" That one baffled me at first since I didnt know how to explain he was beating time...

"Is that like a recorder?"

"Why? Theres no point to it"

"oooh is that a musical instrument?"

"That must take a lot of hard work"

when i'm on the bus and i get

"are you gonna get out your gun" (my clarinet!)

I'm not in bugsy malone for heaven's sake!

Also:

"So how many strings does a clarinet have?"
"Why does your saxophone look like a clarinet??!?" (Because it is a clarinet)

And worse of all

"Do you use it to tune pianos!" (?) By my v. non-musical aunty.

"What do you want more lessons for? - You know how to play it!"

QUOTE (Bagpuss @ May 3 2005, 09:06 PM)

all you do is blow and move your fingers".

... said the actress to the bishop!



Amber
x

PS. My mother: "I don't know why you do all this singing. After all, you've got your family and work to think of."

Maybe I should just change my name to Cinderella?

QUOTE

"What do you want more lessons for? - You know how to play it!"

Even though I'm a professional violinist, my mother still asks me that question when I book a few lessons. It's more about exchanging ideas and helping each other, but it's still learning, and therefore a lesson.

I have a rectangular case for my violin to avoid the need of carrying extra bags with music etc. I remember on the train once someone asked me "what sort of keyboard do you keep in that case?" ???

But, I also went through the mill at school of being picked on and told I was boring because I played an instrument and could read music. Looking back, it actually makes me wonder if was because they were jealous of the fact that I could do something they couldn't
Tables have turned though, I'm not the one with a boring life

The other question that really niggles me is when people ask how much a good instrument costs. They think a couple of hundred quid buys a really decent violin. When you tell them to add a couple of extra zeros on the end they say "Wouldn't you have rather bought a brand new car?" Errrrrr, no, I wouldn't actually. In the long run my violin is my pension fund, it won't rust away and fall apart like a car, it will be worth far much more than I paid for it when I eventually sell the instrument.

Crazy people out there, but I guess it takes all sorts to make a world

QUOTE (Bb Clarinet @ May 4 2005, 09:17 AM)

"So how many strings does a clarinet have?"

No....

Seriously??

That is just blatant stupidity.

"so you can just look at a note and play it!?" yes!
the best one of all was "what do all those dots on that page mean" really!!

I get God Soph you are so boring music is rubbish why do you like it?
How do you play this flute? (yes people pick up my flute without asking and get all their slobber on it)
Why are you so good at music can you help me?

How about this one:

"Why do you bother to practise scales on the flute? It's always the same: Your fingers just go up and down!"

OK, a rhetorical question, why is it that when people (having slobbered all over it!) find they can't blow my flute, do they start singing while holding it up instead...

QUOTE (tamsin @ May 4 2005, 04:56 PM)

OK, a rhetorical question, why is it that when people (having slobbered all over it!) find they can't blow my flute, do they start singing while holding it up instead...

That is so stupid......I'm sorry Tamsin!!!!

what does a conductor do?

(after answer)

o that sounds easy or do you not all just like play together or so the way he waves his hands means something i thought he just did it to look cool!

i have an open hole flute and every single time i get it out, i get asked why there are holes in the keys! Even by my flute playing friends!

Do you just make it up as you go along? Are you going to play your flute? No but I'll play my clarinet!

How do you know which buttons to push?

This one came yesterday from an adult pupil of three months' standing - "When will I be able to play everything?" After I had explained that with music you never finish learning she said "When I learnt to type there was a point when I could do it properly. When will that be with piano? How many more tutor books are there?"

I think this is going to be an ongoing discussion point!

I also get people expressing surprise that I still take lessons.

QUOTE (Suepea @ May 4 2005, 07:30 PM)

This one came yesterday from an adult pupil of three months'

u really shouldnt teach pupils that young

QUOTE

This one came yesterday from an adult pupil of three months'   u really shouldnt teach pupils that young

LOL

oh yeah i play the cello and i walked down a corridor with it and some idiot said what guitar are you learning what was that about

worst question ever asked to a trumpet player-
How do you get so manys notes with only 3 "buttons"?
"bangs his head agaist the desk as the thought of being asked that question comes bck to him"

the most annoying thing that happens to me is some silly chavs come into thier practice room and start banging on the piano when im trying to practice!! - or they stand out side the window dancing and making rude/stupid jestures, they did this once when me and two other trumpet players were practicing for this girls GCSE exam, she was not pleased and so went told them exactly what she thought of them, slapped them both and went back to practicing! - they haven't bothered me since - unless im playing bohemian rhapsody with oddball and my guitarist friend ( well friend when he's not snogging his girl friend in rehersal!)

also people in my tutor group try to take my trumpet out of the case and play it!! - i have to tell them that they can play my cornet (property of the band and therefore not as important and more "expendable" than my precious bach strad trumpet) when i bring it in

me asking year 7 classes- whats my flute made out of?

them- brass

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

QUOTE (Suepea @ May 4 2005, 07:30 PM)

I also get people expressing surprise that I still take lessons.

Me too...

And when they say...but you're so good you don't need to take lessons....that's just annoying

QUOTE (Suepea @ May 4 2005, 07:30 PM)

This one came yesterday from an adult pupil of three months' standing - "When will I be able to play everything?" After I had explained that with music you never finish learning she said "When I learnt to type there was a point when I could do it properly. When will that be with piano? How many more tutor books are there?"

Not so much an annoying question as interesting proof of what people don't know-from husband booking lessons for wife-'how many lessons do you think she'll need?' I had to explain it's not the same as learning to drive.

QUOTE (Oddball @ May 4 2005, 09:30 PM)

And when they say...but you're so good you don't need to take lessons....that's just annoying

Especially when you know how good you aren't! It's impossible to explain to people when they see any level of musical ability as being "wow!"

I hate it when a parent/guardian hears a piece of music and it's very difficult and they ask, "could you play that?" Obviously not!

QUOTE (Hulk @ May 4 2005, 09:48 PM)

I hate it when a parent/guardian hears a piece of music and it's very difficult and they ask, "could you play that?" Obviously not!

ME TOO!!!

my favourites...
1)"why can't you play that song from memory?"
2)"is that a mini guitar?"when they see my violin
3)"why don't you learn the drums?or the guitar?"
4)"can you show me your bazooka?" I feel like punching them when they ask me this!
5)"can you teach me?in one day?"
6)"how do you play without looking at the keys?" (piano) I'll shoot back with "how can you type without looking at the keys?"
and the best...
7)"how come there are black and white notes?" (crotchets and minims!)
ARRRRGGGHHH!!!!!!!!

Also, you poor flute girls who get the "this one time at band camp" quotes from the highly original non-musical people!

And what gets me is that my yamaha clarinet once was assosciated with motorbike spare parts! Like "WOW! I love your new art piece, is it made from old motorbike pieces??????" What??? They had just seen the yamaha sign.

Seriously.

No joke.

I nearly killed myself.

i do not envy musical people with small instrument cases - my cornet case is the perfect size and weight for bashing annoying year 7's !! it also makes a good battering ram for those annoying corridor squeezes, the edges are pointy as well - ouch!!!

aim for the ones that take the mick out of your musicality!

QUOTE (Bb Clarinet @ May 5 2005, 04:44 PM)

And what gets me is that my yamaha clarinet once was assosciated with motorbike spare parts! Like "WOW! I love your new art piece, is it made from old motorbike pieces??????" What??? They had just seen the yamaha sign.

just a thought:would you prefer a clarinet made from motorcycle parts or a motorcycle made from clarinet parts?should give yamaha some ideas...

by the way:smaller cases are easier to swing

QUOTE

would you prefer a clarinet made from motorcycle parts or a motorcycle made from clarinet parts?should give yamaha some ideas...

none of which seem safe!

QUOTE (Bb Clarinet @ May 5 2005, 09:44 AM)

Also, you poor flute girls who get the "this one time at band camp" quotes from the highly original non-musical people!

Yes. It happens all the time. I don't think anyone realises that they are not being original. If I had a penny for everytime someone makes a joke about American Pie, I could buy myself a gold flute *insert sarcastic smily*

QUOTE

i do not envy musical people with small instrument cases

Its quite convienient actually! I, detest getting on the bus with my violin case, but my flute case, no problem! When I was at my old school I used to give up getting on the bus and just walk! But now I would get home 3 hours later. Bah. So I suffice with sticking it in the luggage rack I have alsorts of guesses, ranging from guitar to cello But I can usually just stick my flute in my bag!

*screams* NOT THE AMERICAN PIE JOKE!!

Seriously, does no-one get the fact it simply isn't funny.

Someone once asked my why I was carrying around a fishing rod in school. I wasn't sure wether to take them seriously or not.

i get the "this one time at band camp" i dont even play the flute...............

Not even a funny film in my not-at-all-humble-on-this-point opinion! Fortunately most of my friends have a better sense of humour than to repeat the joke, or maybe they're just scared of what I'd do if they did!

I play cello, and often people think its a guitar, or they call it a big violin.

Most annoying is when you get on the bus, and the driver asks if your cello needs a ticket as well, and they then laugh as though they were the first person to think of it!

Also, people often ask why you sit down with a cello, and not play it sideways like a guitar!

When I say I play in a band and people think I mean like a rock band/guitars+drums band, rather than a concert band and I have to explain to them!

that happens to me as well. very annoying

yeah i know nic!

my mum keeps calling my band an orchestra. im like MUM NO its a bloody big band!!!!