I have a 13 year old daughter who is learning the violin but never practises!
It is really becoming quite an issue with me. I have said to her that I am going to stop her lessons but this has no effect on sudden bursts of practice. she has been learning for some years now, she is about Grade 4. She says she wants to continue learning but I don't understand how she can hope to improve without ANY practice.
I am now thinking of changing teachers but is that silly? Surely, the motivation should come from her.
She happily plays in the school orchestra, not fantastic standard but they have fun.

Katie

QUOTE (Katie @ May 22 2005, 10:34 PM)

I have a 13 year old daughter who is learning the violin but never practises! It is really becoming quite an issue with me. I have said to her that I am going to stop her lessons but this has no effect on sudden bursts of practice. she has been learning for some years now, she is about Grade 4. She says she wants to continue learning but I don't understand how she can hope to improve without ANY practice. I am now thinking of changing teachers but is that silly? Surely, the motivation should come from her. She happily plays in the school orchestra, not fantastic standard but they have fun. Katie

No at 13 I don't think you will find that the motivation will consistently come from the student, especially with so many "other" things changing in their lives. I find with my son in that age that encouragement is extremely necessary. I also recognise that there are times when other priorities are around that it is necessary to "tough it out" for a while, until the interest is rekindled. (I also have to be honest enough to admit that I could be like that at that age!)

If she really enjoys orchestra, and she is around Grade IV, it seems to me a terrible waste to write everything off. (Given a couple of good years at some stage, she could be up around the Grade VI level, playing quite adult repertoire which is extremely interesting and rewarding)

I'll try a little checklist...
What is the extent of involvement of whole family in music? Does anyone else play an instrument - if so, play it more! Do you take her to concerts to see the role models in orchestra and as soloists? Does everybody sing? Do you play good music on radio and CDs? Where is she at with theory - would she benefit from a concentrated effort in that area?

As a side comment, I attended a seminar on bullying in schools a couple of years ago, and the opening statement made was this - EVERYONE needs positive encouragement in life - adult and child.

Katie, grade 4/age 13 was around the time I had my Damascene conversion. I'd been learning the piano for four years, doing reasonably well but hated practising - poor parents were constantly getting grumbles from my teacher. It's round about this level on the piano that you start to get good things to play (well, at least this was the case back in the early 80s, before Christopher Norton and co livened things up). Once I was able to play things that I thought sounded good, I started to play more with less coercion.
The other thing that helped was doing a deal with my Mum on what I'd keep up. I think at that stage it was ballet Monday, brownies tuesday, ballet wednesday if exams were coming up, piano thursday and swimming friday. We agreed I'd keep up the swimming and piano, and I've kept up both since.

As it happened my original teacher took very ill at the end of my Grade 4 year and couldn't continue teaching. I switched to a much younger lady who gave me some more interesting repertoire. In hindsight, I think this worked out very well - my original teacher wouldn't have had me playing anything written after 1890 I suspect. I don't know whether this was material in my 'keeping going', but I think at 13 you're still needing motivation from your parents and teacher.

Thanks for above suggestions.
The trouble is that I play a lot, all classical music and my daughter doesn't like classical. She has a very good ear and sense of rhythm and does like music. She has started drums at school and enjoys that, not too much pratice there but more than the violin and voluntarily.


Katie

Have you considered getting her into Jazz stuff? There are a few jazz stringers round here who could point you in the right direction (Violinia, you about???!)

I agree that 13 year old self-starters are probably rare!

Elder son Airman is now 13. He truly regrets every time he doesn't put in the necessary work on something and it comes crashing down on his head, but the very next day, it's the mixture as before. He thinks that he should do xxx and that he is going to do xxx "any minute now", and is genuinely surprised to find that the day has finished, and xxx remains undone.

However, it's a time to support what commitments there is, I think - and despite ups and downs, usually it's obvious which areas attract the child most strongly, and I can see the mental commitment strengthening as time passes, although the actions lag a bit behind.

My 14 year old daughter is exactly the same - I play a lot in the house and she does love to be involved in music activities outside with me but practising is always 'next on the list'. I found when she became involved in small groups doing music she was more keen on that she went to work more readily. She is Gde 4, is working for Gde 5 but getting her to work for that is not easy either. This is my second daughter so I've previous experience - I think they pass through and provided the right circumstances exist their interest is rekindled.