Hi everyone,
I am going on tour to Germany in the summer with a wind orchestra (a mixture of 2 bands I think) and then the week after I come back I am going on a week long flute course where I'll have to stay in accommodation on my own.

I am going because I know, once I am there I probably will enjoy them, and if I don't get into a band this year then touring will be a fantastic experience, I mean, I don't think I am ever going to be a professional musician, so to perform in another country is fantastic. The thing is that I don't know anyone who is going, and that obviously I'll have to choose someone to share a room with etc., and I am just going to be really worried and lonely if I don't know anyone. A;so, the music will not be easy. We are playing a mixture of things that I have played in my band and some stuff which the band above my band play (which most likely Grade 8ish stuff).

With the flute course, it is slightly different. I am going on this week long course, but most people who go on this course don't stay in accommodation. The reason I am is because I live too far out to come to the course everyday. Anyway, at the same time there is another course going on, but this is for university students, people who are going to become professionals in music type thing, and will be much better and older than me. The thing is at dinner time/breakfast, I won't know anyone and as they are so different to me, I'll feel uncomfortable. I do know the director who runs it's daughter, and possibly someone I know will be going, but I'll still be worried, especially since my course ends at 4. I'll then have to do something between 4 and 8ish as there are evening concerts.

I just would hate to go and feel lonely all the time, and I would feel like I would have let my parents and some of my money go to waste. I really wouldn't like to feel like this, as it does cost a lot to do these things.

I am sorry this is so long, but I just wanted to make the right decision, I am already going on tour, but as yet haven't sent off my application form to the flute course, but have to on Tuesday.

All advice/tips would be welcome, sorry for the length of this!

Go for it, Nicki! Just make a point, both on the foreign tour and on the flute course, of beginning conversations with other people rather than sitting quietly on the sidelines. This can seem very awkward and a bit 'forced' if you are naturally a shy person, but it will pay dividends - you can bet that there are other shy people there too,who will be only too pleased to talk to you, and once you have a group of people-you-know, you won't be lonely. You can make lifelong friends from these sorts of trips/courses!

I hope you have a lovely time - and hope you'll be able to make the Forum Users' concert too!

Yes, my Dad said to me "Why let something as small as not knowing anyone stop you."

It is just like when I started at band, the first day I hated it as I couldn't play the music and knew nobody. I thought everyone else knew each other, but then 2 people had been told to get to know me as they knew people who knew me. Now I love it! I am not naturally shy, but do feel initimated by extravert people.

I plan to either go with the people I know, if I know anybody or, with the person I share a stand with. Could be a bit daunting!

Thanks, I'll keep you posted about the course, tour and my audition results!

You will get to know loads of people on tour - I toured with my orchestra last year and I only knew a few people, but it was much more comfortable by the end. Even if you're not going to be a professional musician, experiences like this will serve you well in later life when you get a new job and don't know anyone. Once you realise it's easy to meet people you won't feel so nervous about it later on. You're doing a very brave thing - lots of teenagers and other adults who might appear confident in a group of friends would be terrified of doing things alone. You should be proud of yourself for living life to the full and taking advantage of every opportunity! I'll do anything on my own if I think it'll be interesting/worthwhile. Just remember, it can only get easier. Hope the exams go well next week. Don't get too stressed, I'm sure you'll do fine.

Thanks Hannah. I am throwing myself in the deep end, but I want to keep my motivation going throughout the summer. It is just really daunting though! Thanks so much for the best wishes about exams, I hope they go well

Hi, Nicki,
I think you should apply for the flute course as you will probably enjoy it and meet loads of great people. It's a really brave thing to do and each time you do something like this it becomes easier to do it the next time. I'm very shy normally but I've been on work experience for a fortnight and I didn't know anyone there. On the first day I was terrified but within about an hour I felt comfortable because I was talking to the other people there and they were making me laugh. Now I've finished my work experience and plan to keep in touch with several people there. It has helped my confidence enormously and I feel a lot more comfortable with other people, even when they are older than myself.

Anyway, the point of me rambling on is to say that it will be a great experience for you and I'm sure you will meet lots of new people. You are obviously very friendly and you've helped me with some of my musical problems and so I'm sure people will want to talk to you. Hope you enjoy yourself!

Goodness, this is going to sound so silly, I am fine with older adults, but when it comes to like people who are 20ish, I get really shy!
I was fine at work experience, but the most terrifying thing for me is being on my own for a week. It should be good, but I like knowing people. Arghhhh, plus it doesn't make me feel any better that my flute playing is abismal right now.

QUOTE

I am fine with older adults, but when it comes to like people who are 20ish, I get really shy!

I'm the same, not exactly sure why!

QUOTE

It should be good, but I like knowing people

I know what you mean. For example, my music centre's senior orchestra taster day is the same day as my friend's (who is also applying) theory exam. Therefore, I'll be on my own and terrified!

Awww, I hope it goes ok for you. The worst thing is, I couldn't tell whether people knew each other when I first came to band, and I thought they all did, so I stayed on my own . It was only by luck that I made friends.

QUOTE

Awww, I hope it goes ok for you

Thanks! The people I [/B]do[B][/B] know in the senior orchestra are very nice but I don't know very many of them. I'm terrified that I do something stupid or can't play the music so the conductor will try to stop me from coming next year.

Hi Nicki! You are so lucky to have both these fantastic opportunities. Don't worry about not knowing anyone. You will be surprised how many people there are in the same position as you and you will make lots of new friends very quickly. I know I was apprehensive about similar things when I was your age but I really enjoyed it and knew nearly everyone within a day! It also improved my viola playing immensely! Have a great time, enjoy yourself and I look forward to reading about it on the forum when you get back.

Hi Nicki. I would jump at something like that, as it must be a wonderful opportunity. You will definitely enjoy touring. I am really shy as well, but I try not to let that be a barrier to doing things I want to do. Enjoy it.

Oh DO go on it! Even if you feel a little shy and find yourself at a loose end in the evenings, that's surely bearable for the sense of community and belonging while you're doing the course and music-making. The bonus would be the one or two friends you may make and keep contact with over time. You wont be the only shy one there.

Lovely. Go for it! You may regret afterwards if you don't. Chances like this won't happen often.
All the best.

Nicki, there are no such thing as strangers, just friends you haven't met yet! You must be good enough if they've accepted you on the course, so don't worry. You'll be amazed at how much you'll learn from other people as well.

Music tours rule! Our choir went to Paris three years ago, and sang the Faure Requiem in La Madeleine to an audience of about 700, something we could probably never manage on our own patch. That in itself made the tour worthwhile, but the bonding really paid dividends for subsequent performances as well.

QUOTE (Deborah @ May 29 2005, 11:59 AM)

Nicki, there are no such thing as strangers, just friends you haven't met yet!

Thats so true. I must remember that!

QUOTE

I'm terrified that I do something stupid or can't play the music so the conductor will try to stop me from coming next year.

Ditto. We played a joint piece with them, and they were fantastic. When I go on tour, we're doing a mixture of their pieces and my band's pieces.

QUOTE

It also improved my viola playing immensely!

This is one of the reasons why I want to do flute things in the summer, to keep my motivation up!

QUOTE

Hi Nicki. I would jump at something like that, as it must be a wonderful opportunity. You will definitely enjoy touring. I am really shy as well, but I try not to let that be a barrier to doing things I want to do. Enjoy it.

I am definitely going. Feeling a bit more confident about the flute course, for instance, know some people which are going, but have never met them before. Touring, well, hopefully I'll be more settled after my 3 day, intensive course!

QUOTE

Lovely. Go for it! You may regret afterwards if you don't. Chances like this won't happen often.

Exactly, I mean who else gets to tour foreign countries and go on courses with top flute players. It doesn't happen that often, and I really wouldn't want to regret something. It is like the time we went to Wimbledon (tennis tournament) with the school, and my friend and I got offered Centre Court tickets from this couple who were leaving, and we didn't take them because we got told not to accept tickets by our teachers! But it would have been fantastic. Thanks for the best wishes.

QUOTE

You must be good enough if they've accepted you on the course, so don't worry.

I really don't know why I am on it, obviously someone dropped out, as I wasn't originally asked to go. But even though I am 4th 1st flute, I don't feel like I am good enough to go.

QUOTE

That in itself made the tour worthwhile, but the bonding really paid dividends for subsequent performances as well.

If I got into the highest band, it would make it easier if I already knew these people. I won't know whether I get in though until after I have toured. I SO want to get in.

Hi Nicki,

I know exactly how you feel as quite recently I moved to UK from a foreign country, and had to cope with a new country, school, house etc. A couple of weeks ago I went on my first county orchestra residential course. I was really nervous about it as I didn't know anyone at all, and I am quite shy. I was also worried that I wouldn't be good enough as I only started the viola relatively recently and don't feel that confident. In the end I really enjoyed the week and it was really good for me (my musicianship improved measurably and I became a bit less shy!). I also have a tour later this year which I feel a bit worried about but I will force myself to go as I'm sure I will benfit from it.

Enjoy your tour and course! And good luck for the rest of your GCSEs! (My next one is geography on 6/6)

Hi Puff Cat!
That must have been hard moving to the UK, I would not envy your situation.
I am glad you enjoyed the course, like you I know I should go on these things, I will learn so much, and of course if I go to university, I won't know anyone there, so it will help me with situations like that.
Thanks for the best wishes, I have Science on the 6th, ergh!
What GCSEs are you taking?
Nicki

Hi Nicki,

My GCSEs: Music, Geography, Classical Civilisations, Italian and all of the usual ones (Maths, English (x2), Science, French).

Let me know how your tour and course go!

Wow, you've got some interesting GCSEs there, good luck with them.
I'll post a topic when I've done my tour, that'll be in late July