Swell-box, Being dispatched by a hymn-book should render a person eligible for instant heavenly reward - what better way for a pious person to go?
Here Lieth Margaret Smith
As doth the Elbow of the Organist, so moveth God in Mysterious Ways:
Margaret was hurried to Heaven's gate,
By a blow on the bonce from Mission Praise;
A hymnal of considerable weight,
It brought an end to her mortal days.
Uninsured, she rests with Him,
who summoned her to Him, with a Hymn.
Reader, ensure your insurance is paid,
And your arm is still as you sit aloft,
Lest Adam's fall, the fall of a book,
Be blamed on an action that you took.
With God and Aviva be unafraid,
though Law be Heavy and Heads be soft